Poop I learned some stuff about hippos today - Page 2

**RealSNR** · 08-26-2012, 11:39 PM

One of my friends is working in Tanzania currently, and for part of his vacation he went on safari. Some of the pictures he brought back are hella cool. He was telling me that the best pictures he took by far are the ones of the hippos, simply because he was lucky and had a cab driver who wasn't afraid to get close to see them. I didn't understand what he meant, but he explained to me that of all human deaths by animals, hippos are the most dangerous. They kill far more people than any other animal. They will eat anything that accidentally wanders onto their territory. Lions, gazelles, birds, humans... ****ing crocodiles sometimes.

The other reason why the hippo picture was so impressive was because the stench of these animals is un****ingbearable. He was saying that these are some of the most disgusting mammalian creatures in existence. The hippos he encountered were all hanging out in their own pool. That's kind of where they spend all of their time. ALL of their time. They shit in there, too. They spend almost all of their time bathing in their own shit. Literally, the pool/pond is low-oxygen. Turbid. It doesn't drain, either, so they just shit in it day in and day out. Only a few species of fish can survive in there.

I'm posting his side of the story from our AIM chat log. Paraphrasing his words probably isn't going to be as effective:

(4:01:00 PM) and i saw one of them do it
(4:01:11 PM) it stood up out of the water and let out this continuous blast
(4:01:21 PM) but then it also spun its fat little tail
(4:01:22 PM) like a propeller
(4:01:25 PM) so shit literally
(4:01:27 PM) hit the fan
(4:01:28 PM) and went every which way
(4:01:37 PM) onto the heads of its fellow hippos
(4:01:42 PM) then it sat down

I'm letting you all know this incase you ever find yourselves in an area of the world where hippos live in the wild. Be warned by the strong stench of stale watery shit. If you are not naturally deterred and foolishly continue investigating, keep your eyes peeled for hippos. For the love of God, watch out. Because they are assholes, and will eat anything and everything. So unless you want to suffer the shittiest fate imaginable, where you get shit on, ripped to shreds, eaten, and pooped out into a pond of year-old hippo diarrhea, WATCH YOURSELF. Beware of hippos.

Al Bundy · 08-27-2012, 05:40 AM

I don't think Hippo's "eat people" They eat plants, but they do kill people by drowning them, and they also kill Crocs by bashing their skulls in, but I don't believe they ever eat them.

Aries Walker · 08-27-2012, 05:42 AM

Hippos kill more people than any other animal in Africa.

Black Bob · 08-27-2012, 06:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aries Walker

Hippos kill more people than any other animal in Africa.

Hippos are bad ass and most people don't know it. I think the only other animal that kills more people is dogs.

Dayze · 08-27-2012, 06:23 AM

Too fat / Omaha

JD10367 · 08-27-2012, 07:03 AM

Hippos are not to be ****ed with. The saying in Africa is, "Never get between a hippo and his territorial waters." They'll be picking you up with a sponge.

WV · 08-27-2012, 07:18 AM

Funny that two of the more docile looking animals are the most dangerous. The Hippo and the Cape Buffalo.

blaise · 08-27-2012, 07:26 AM

I saw a doc once on South American hippos. A drug lord brought them down to have on his property, he died or got arrested, and now they live in a river there sort of wild.

Radar Chief · 08-27-2012, 07:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SNR

Photographic evidence (this is his picture; you won't find this anywhere else using a google search):

The water even looks disgusting.

Ceej · 08-27-2012, 07:46 AM

I mean -- who else wouldn't enjoy hanging around in water all day, while bathing in your own shit getting a tan?

That sounds magnificent!

**RealSNR** · 08-27-2012, 08:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CJizzles

I mean -- who else wouldn't enjoy hanging around in water all day, while bathing in your own shit getting a tan?

That sounds magnificent!

Agreed. And if I could ever pass gas like that hippo in the video, sign me up now!

blaise · 08-27-2012, 08:20 AM

Hippos will kill other hippos, too. I've seen video where a juvenile comes to close to an adult male and he just grabs it in his mouth and shakes it all around until it dies.

Agent V · 08-27-2012, 08:23 AM

I was at a zoo that had an underwater viewing area of the hippo habitat, and I thought it was hilarious because it's just a murky, greenish-yellow tub of shit and piss. And the accompanying sign explained that all accurately.

It was my favorite exhibit.

Abba-Dabba · 08-27-2012, 08:25 AM

Hippo's and Cp'ers are like two peas in a pod. A bunch of gasbags that can't stop flinging poo.

bricks · 08-27-2012, 08:25 AM

I wonder how many pounds of pressure are behind those jaws everytime it locks down a bite?

I know crocs have like 2000lbs of pressure everytime their jaws clamp. Those pounds of pressure is equivalent to having an elevator filled with 8-10 people.

**Saul Good** · 08-27-2012, 08:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blaise

Hippos will kill other hippos, too. I've seen video where a juvenile comes to close to an adult male and he just grabs it in his mouth and shakes it all around until it dies.

I saw that documentary. It was one of the most disturbing things I've ever seen.

08-26-2012, 11:39 PM
RealSNR Special Teams ACE!!! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Where the hell is SNR Casino cash: $1820208	I learned some stuff about hippos today One of my friends is working in Tanzania currently, and for part of his vacation he went on safari. Some of the pictures he brought back are hella cool. He was telling me that the best pictures he took by far are the ones of the hippos, simply because he was lucky and had a cab driver who wasn't afraid to get close to see them. I didn't understand what he meant, but he explained to me that of all human deaths by animals, hippos are the most dangerous. They kill far more people than any other animal. They will eat anything that accidentally wanders onto their territory. Lions, gazelles, birds, humans... **ing crocodiles sometimes. The other reason why the hippo picture was so impressive was because the stench of these animals is un**ingbearable. He was saying that these are some of the most disgusting mammalian creatures in existence. The hippos he encountered were all hanging out in their own pool. That's kind of where they spend all of their time. ALL of their time. They shit in there, too. They spend almost all of their time bathing in their own shit. Literally, the pool/pond is low-oxygen. Turbid. It doesn't drain, either, so they just shit in it day in and day out. Only a few species of fish can survive in there. I'm posting his side of the story from our AIM chat log. Paraphrasing his words probably isn't going to be as effective: (4:01:00 PM) and i saw one of them do it (4:01:11 PM) it stood up out of the water and let out this continuous blast (4:01:21 PM) but then it also spun its fat little tail (4:01:22 PM) like a propeller (4:01:25 PM) so shit literally (4:01:27 PM) hit the fan (4:01:28 PM) and went every which way (4:01:37 PM) onto the heads of its fellow hippos (4:01:42 PM) then it sat down I'm letting you all know this incase you ever find yourselves in an area of the world where hippos live in the wild. Be warned by the strong stench of stale watery shit. If you are not naturally deterred and foolishly continue investigating, keep your eyes peeled for hippos. For the love of God, watch out. Because they are assholes, and will eat anything and everything. So unless you want to suffer the shittiest fate imaginable, where you get shit on, ripped to shreds, eaten, and pooped out into a pond of year-old hippo diarrhea, WATCH YOURSELF. Beware of hippos.
Posts: 90,851

08-27-2012, 05:40 AM	#16
Al Bundy Damnit Peg Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Overland Park Casino cash: $5111831	I don't think Hippo's "eat people" They eat plants, but they do kill people by drowning them, and they also kill Crocs by bashing their skulls in, but I don't believe they ever eat them.
Posts: 23,364

08-27-2012, 05:42 AM	#17
Aries Walker Back again, again. Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: York, PA Casino cash: $9583357	Hippos kill more people than any other animal in Africa.
Posts: 8,179

08-27-2012, 06:23 AM	#19
Dayze Resident Glue Sniffer Join Date: Nov 2003 Casino cash: $4709358	Too fat / Omaha
Posts: 37,381

08-27-2012, 07:03 AM	#20
JD10367 Cheaterlover* Join Date: May 2009 Location: RI Casino cash: $10010716	Hippos are not to be ****ed with. The saying in Africa is, "Never get between a hippo and his territorial waters." They'll be picking you up with a sponge.
Posts: 12,916

08-27-2012, 07:18 AM	#21
WV Veteran Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: In the Holler Casino cash: $10004950	Funny that two of the more docile looking animals are the most dangerous. The Hippo and the Cape Buffalo.
Posts: 4,983

08-27-2012, 07:26 AM	#22
blaise In Search of a Life Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Plano, TX Casino cash: $9999900	I saw a doc once on South American hippos. A drug lord brought them down to have on his property, he died or got arrested, and now they live in a river there sort of wild.
Posts: 22,188

08-27-2012, 07:46 AM	#24
Ceej BOOM!1! Join Date: Aug 2004 Casino cash: $9195541	I mean -- who else wouldn't enjoy hanging around in water all day, while bathing in your own shit getting a tan? That sounds magnificent!
Posts: 18,789

08-27-2012, 08:20 AM	#26
blaise In Search of a Life Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Plano, TX Casino cash: $9999900	Hippos will kill other hippos, too. I've seen video where a juvenile comes to close to an adult male and he just grabs it in his mouth and shakes it all around until it dies.
Posts: 22,188

08-27-2012, 08:23 AM	#27
Agent V Bring me Geno. Join Date: Sep 2006 Casino cash: $10004900	I was at a zoo that had an underwater viewing area of the hippo habitat, and I thought it was hilarious because it's just a murky, greenish-yellow tub of shit and piss. And the accompanying sign explained that all accurately. It was my favorite exhibit.
Posts: 1,938

08-27-2012, 08:25 AM	#28
Abba-Dabba MVP Join Date: May 2001 Casino cash: $4482970	Hippo's and Cp'ers are like two peas in a pod. A bunch of gasbags that can't stop flinging poo.
Posts: 18,149

08-27-2012, 08:25 AM	#29
bricks Hey Teacher! Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: land of maple syrup Casino cash: $9902559	I wonder how many pounds of pressure are behind those jaws everytime it locks down a bite? I know crocs have like 2000lbs of pressure everytime their jaws clamp. Those pounds of pressure is equivalent to having an elevator filled with 8-10 people.
Posts: 5,513