Football Right now - how good a high school quarterback would you be?

**Rain Man** · 07:03 PM

Here's the scenario. It's Friday night. You go out to get yourself some Popeye's Fried Chicken. As you drive over, you see the local high school stadium lit up, and you see a snow cone stand up in the booster club's booth.

Dang, you think to yourself. I could really go for a snow cone right now. So you pull off and park and walk over to get yourself one. There are only 5 seconds left in the game.

At that moment, the quarterback gets Theismanized on a fluke hit. Most of the team immediately starts vomiting. Their helicopter parents, assuming ebola and regretting their stance against vaccination, immediately descend from the stands and take them home, with plans to move them to the soccer team as soon as possible.

When all is said and done, there are only ten players left on the home team.

The team's not great, but it's not bad. They're a .500 club in Class 4A, with a reasonable line and slightly above average running back. One receiver made all-district last year and the left guard may have a scholarship offer to Montana State. The tight end is all-conference and he's only a sophomore.

But they have no quarterback. After exhausting all other options, they look up into the stands where you're just starting to enjoy your blue raspberry snow cone. You have two years of eligibility left from high school even though you're at your current age. and one of the cheerleaders has a pair of cleats in her car that will fit you.

They need a quarterback to finish out the season. You have a dream. Assume that there are six games left on the schedule, and you can be at every practice. By the end of the year, how would you perform?

Remember, this is happening right now. Your current age, your current weight, your current conditioning.

Discuss Thrower · 12-08-2014, 06:55 PM

I'd have a Palko esque velocity on my spiral, wouldn't be able to run a read option, probably get easily confused on which route to throw to.

Hog's Gone Fishin · 12-08-2014, 06:56 PM

Well, seeing how I'm 4 yards away from a heart attack it won't end well.

**BigRedChief** · 12-08-2014, 06:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man

Here's the scenario. It's Friday night. You go out to get yourself some Popeye's Fried Chicken. As you drive over, you see the local high school stadium lit up, and you see a snow cone stand up in the booster club's booth.

Dang, you think to yourself. I could really go for a snow cone right now. So you pull off and park and walk over to get yourself one. There are only 5 seconds left in the game.

At that moment, the quarterback gets Theismanized on a fluke hit. Most of the team immediately starts vomiting. Their helicopter parents, assuming ebola and regretting their stance against vaccination, immediately descend from the stands and take them home, with plans to move them to the soccer team as soon as possible.

When all is said and done, there are only ten players left on the home team.
The team's not great, but it's not bad. They're a .500 club in Class 4A, with a reasonable line and slightly above average running back. One receiver made all-district last year and the left guard may have a scholarship offer to Montana State. The tight end is all-conference and he's only a sophomore.

But they have no quarterback. After exhausting all other options, they look up into the stands where you're just starting to enjoy your blue raspberry snow cone. You have two years of eligibility left from high school even though you're at your current age. and one of the cheerleaders has a pair of cleats in her car that will fit you.

They need a quarterback to finish out the season. You have a dream. Assume that there are six games left on the schedule, and you can be at every practice. By the end of the year, how would you perform?

Remember, this is happening right now. Your current age, your current weight, your current conditioning.

Better than at least a BILLION people.

**The Franchise** · 12-08-2014, 06:57 PM

Let's do this.

**Bugeater** · 12-08-2014, 06:57 PM

I sucked at throwing the ball when I had a good rotator cuff.

**Rain Man** · 12-08-2014, 06:59 PM

Honestly, I would be off the charts bad.

I can run, so I've got that going for me. But probably not nearly as fast as a typical high school kid.

On the passing, I've got a torn elbow tendon right now that completely puts throwing out of the question. But even if it was healthy I'd have a range of about 15 yards maximum. My throwing muscles don't get much of a workout.

In terms of reading defenses and stuff, I could probably pick up on that pretty fast. It would be the execution that's a problem.

Dayze · 12-08-2014, 06:59 PM

How close are the nearest mountains?

**TimBone** · 12-08-2014, 07:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dicky McElephant

Let's do this.

stevieray · 12-08-2014, 07:00 PM

Adequate at slants curls and posts...just no hail marys.
Ii could prolly still make people miss.. a little...lol

Not Al Bundy

ROYC75 · 12-08-2014, 07:00 PM

My current age, my current weight, my current conditioning?

You Tube moment...... Crash & Burn!

Give me my body back in 1975 ( I was a QB ) and my current brain ....... Oh forget about it, no chemistry, just too many odds against it for only 5 seconds & my current age & condition.

**Rain Man** · 12-08-2014, 07:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dayze

How close are the nearest mountains?

Not quite close enough to throw over.

tk13 · 12-08-2014, 07:01 PM

How much you wanna bet I can throw a football over them mountains?

**TimBone** · 12-08-2014, 07:02 PM

Can the TE move to QB, and I move to TE? I know he's all conference, but he's only a sophomore, lots of time to learn a new position.

I'd be much more valuable to the team as a TE. I am inaccurate as a passer, but I can block and I can catch anything that touches my hands.

**Rain Man** · 12-08-2014, 07:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TimBone

Can the TE move to QB, and I move to TE? I know he's all conference, but he's only a sophomore, lots of time to learn a new position.

I'd be much more valuable to the team as a TE. I am inaccurate as a passer, but I can block and I can catch anything that touches my hands.

You can't screw over his scholarship chances. He's got a chance to be all-state at some point.

View Poll Results: By the end of the season, I would be...
Off the charts state-championship scholarship to the U good.	9	13.24%
Much better than the average high school quarterback	3	4.41%
A little better than the average high school quarterback	5	7.35%
Roughly equivalent to the average high school quarterback	3	4.41%
A little worse than the average high school quarterback	6	8.82%
A whole lot worse than the average high school quarterback	22	32.35%
Off the charts George Plimpton Paper Lion bad (or Matt Cassel during a blitz)	14	20.59%
Not applicable. My mother would never sign my permission slip to play.	3	4.41%
I can't tell you. I would take it one week at a time and not look ahead.	3	4.41%
Voters: 68. You may not vote on this poll

12-08-2014, 06:53 PM
Rain Man NFL's #1 Ermines Fan Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $3058491 VARSITY	Right now - how good a high school quarterback would you be? Here's the scenario. It's Friday night. You go out to get yourself some Popeye's Fried Chicken. As you drive over, you see the local high school stadium lit up, and you see a snow cone stand up in the booster club's booth. Dang, you think to yourself. I could really go for a snow cone right now. So you pull off and park and walk over to get yourself one. There are only 5 seconds left in the game. At that moment, the quarterback gets Theismanized on a fluke hit. Most of the team immediately starts vomiting. Their helicopter parents, assuming ebola and regretting their stance against vaccination, immediately descend from the stands and take them home, with plans to move them to the soccer team as soon as possible. When all is said and done, there are only ten players left on the home team. The team's not great, but it's not bad. They're a .500 club in Class 4A, with a reasonable line and slightly above average running back. One receiver made all-district last year and the left guard may have a scholarship offer to Montana State. The tight end is all-conference and he's only a sophomore. But they have no quarterback. After exhausting all other options, they look up into the stands where you're just starting to enjoy your blue raspberry snow cone. You have two years of eligibility left from high school even though you're at your current age. and one of the cheerleaders has a pair of cleats in her car that will fit you. They need a quarterback to finish out the season. You have a dream. Assume that there are six games left on the schedule, and you can be at every practice. By the end of the year, how would you perform? Remember, this is happening right now. Your current age, your current weight, your current conditioning. Last edited by Rain Man; 12-08-2014 at 07:03 PM..
Posts: 141,659

12-08-2014, 06:55 PM	#2
Discuss Thrower "You like to drink?" Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: "I like to drink." Casino cash: $2996869	I'd have a Palko esque velocity on my spiral, wouldn't be able to run a read option, probably get easily confused on which route to throw to. __________________ Chiefs 2016 Opponents: Home: JAX, TEN, NO, TB, NYJ. Away: HOU, IND, ATL, CAR, PIT Chiefs 2017 Opponents: Home: BUF, MIA, PHI, WSH, AFC North. Away: NE, NYJ, NYG, DAL, AFC South
Posts: 42,886

12-08-2014, 06:56 PM	#3
Hog's Gone Fishin Fish are scared of me Join Date: Nov 2001 Casino cash: $1460477	Well, seeing how I'm 4 yards away from a heart attack it won't end well.
Posts: 40,388

12-08-2014, 06:57 PM	#5
The Franchise Most Valuable Villain Join Date: Dec 2006 Casino cash: $2845047	Let's do this.
Posts: 92,296

12-08-2014, 06:57 PM	#6
Bugeater The Maintenance Guy Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Renovated Bugeater Estate Casino cash: $6232680	I sucked at throwing the ball when I had a good rotator cuff.
Posts: 70,443

12-08-2014, 06:59 PM	#7
Rain Man NFL's #1 Ermines Fan Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $3058491 VARSITY	Honestly, I would be off the charts bad. I can run, so I've got that going for me. But probably not nearly as fast as a typical high school kid. On the passing, I've got a torn elbow tendon right now that completely puts throwing out of the question. But even if it was healthy I'd have a range of about 15 yards maximum. My throwing muscles don't get much of a workout. In terms of reading defenses and stuff, I could probably pick up on that pretty fast. It would be the execution that's a problem. __________________ I'm putting random letters here as a celebration of free speech: xigrakgrah misorojeq rkemeseit.
Posts: 141,659

12-08-2014, 06:59 PM	#8
Dayze Resident Glue Sniffer Join Date: Nov 2003 Casino cash: $4959358	How close are the nearest mountains? __________________ Life is 99% inspiration, 1% Perspiration, and 1% Attention to Detial. RIP & Godspeed: Saccoppo Lonewolf Ed Fire Me Boy
Posts: 37,375

12-08-2014, 07:00 PM	#10
stevieray best in the biz Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Under Pressure Casino cash: $2325273	Adequate at slants curls and posts...just no hail marys. Ii could prolly still make people miss.. a little...lol Not Al Bundy
Posts: 71,350

12-08-2014, 07:00 PM	#11
ROYC75 Time For Your Wake Up Call !!! Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Barn Yard Casino cash: $5439400	My current age, my current weight, my current conditioning? You Tube moment...... Crash & Burn! Give me my body back in 1975 ( I was a QB ) and my current brain ....... Oh forget about it, no chemistry, just too many odds against it for only 5 seconds & my current age & condition. Last edited by ROYC75; 12-08-2014 at 07:27 PM..
Posts: 37,010

12-08-2014, 07:01 PM	#13
tk13 ... Join Date: Nov 2001 Casino cash: $1742500	How much you wanna bet I can throw a football over them mountains?
Posts: 54,988

12-08-2014, 07:02 PM	#14
TimBone Mostly Ignored Join Date: Jul 2013 Casino cash: $8499985	Can the TE move to QB, and I move to TE? I know he's all conference, but he's only a sophomore, lots of time to learn a new position. I'd be much more valuable to the team as a TE. I am inaccurate as a passer, but I can block and I can catch anything that touches my hands.
Posts: 18,096