What form of punishment did you receive as a kid from your parents? (both)

[ROYC75]

What form of punishment did you receive as a kid from both of your parents?

Dad - Spring,summer, Fall, a green apple switch, he made us cut it and it better be flimsy.
Winter - Belt, anything he could find.

Sometimes for a milder form, an attention getter, a swift kick in the ass with his size 12 boot.

Mom - You just wait until your Dad gets home!

[BucEyedPea]

Gee, sounds like y'all had parents on the same page with each other as mine were. My ex always interfered in any discipline and friends thought I was already soft with my daughter. She responded to the mildest form of discipline and didn't need it often and he would even prevent that and gang up on me. It would be for things like not getting homework done, whispering to a friend who was over for supper while the other friend was left out. She was simply told it wasn't good manners but noooooo... he even had to interfere in that and protect her. Luckily she turned out well. She never was really bad and was an easy child to handle if you just explained to her why something wasn't right. Then I'd make it her choice.

I did not believe in enforcement of how she had to take care of her room, any of her personal property, or forced sharing with other kids with something exclusively her's/ If it was her's it was her's. Didn't want to raise a commie. Would just teach how to neaten it with no scolding. Gave her a choice on sharing her personal things. She turned out to be a neat-nick too. But she wasn't as a child. I sometimes needed a fork-lift to get into it.

[srvy]

Originally Posted by -King-

I mean weight doesn't really have anything to do with how much something hurts when it hits you.

Id rather be hit with a ping pong ball than a billiard ball. Id take a feather over a mac truck. Id rather be punched by a piano player than George Foreman. You know the piano player won't want to hurt their hand.

[Frosty]

My dad spanked me with either a hand or belt, usually on the bare butt. I was also frequently grounded or had some kind of privilege withheld (I was a perfect angel from age 15 to 16 because I wanted to drive so bad and they kept threatening me with not getting my license). Usually it was a spanking followed by grounding.

The last time he tried to spank/hit me was when I was in jr high. I smarted off to him as I walked by and he took a swing at my butt. Without thinking about it, I put my arm back and blocked him. I got grounded for that but I think he realized I was big enough to fight back at that point. After that, it was endless lectures and putdowns. I actually would have preferred getting hit, I think.

My mom was the one to watch out for. She was usually pretty mellow but if you pushed her too hard, she would snap and work you over with whatever was handy - fly swatter, wooden spoon, Hot Wheels track, whatever. One of the most memorable times was when I was around 7 and she worked over the back of my bare legs with one of those long bean pods from an Indian Bean tree.

The last time with her was when she slapped my face when I was in high school. The problem was I had braces and it shredded the inside of my mouth. I got a LOT of mileage over that. This was around the same time she got religious and I mostly got preached to after that, which was almost worse.

[FlaChief58]

Mom was the instgater, dad was the ruthless enforcer. Mostly with his western style belt but if that wasn't handy, whatever was close. If the laws were the same then as they are now, my brother and I would have been in foster care and my dad would have served some major time. I swore I wouldn't discipline my kids the way he did us. Although I forgave them both, I'll never forget. Those scars cut too deep

[ModSocks]

Originally Posted by displacedinMN

Spare the rod....spoil the child.

When corporal punishment is done correctly, and timely...it is an effective tool. There is a time and place for everything. The problem is when that type of thing is overused or underused. Which is the same for any punishment.

Just need to know what tool in the best in the tool box.

My ex-sister in law would yell and the drop of the hat and threaten time out to her 12 year old. Guess what never worked....anything she ever said. Damn I am glad that woman is gone.

Corporal punishment is effective when needed. It also deters many others from getting the same punishment. It should never be taken away from schools--and yes we should have cameras in school rooms. I would gladly wear on as a test subject.

Idk, man. I find that simply being real with my boy and tellin' him straight up works really well. Garnering respect from your child so that he just wants to do good in your eyes goes a long way. He appreciates being treated like a man. Talked to like a man. And in turn, responds like a man.

And i'd much rather treat him with dignity and respect than to beat his ass with some random object.

Not to bash on anyone's parents, but some of the stuff being told here i couldn't imagine doing to my kid. For what? A lot of it sounds more like a parent being a dick and venting frustration than it does teaching a lesson.

[ModSocks]

Have any of ya'll ever looked at the different parenting types and assessed what kind of parent you are?

I believe my views line up closer to what they call a "Free-Range Parent".

Right now, my wife and i are having a big falling out with her sister, husband and son. We have entirely different parenting styles and we're no longer on speaking terms.

I mean....i could write a story about it, but **** you guys would shit a chicken if i told you the kind of shit they're doing with their 6 year old boy. I personally think they're raising a future psychopath.

They're what the experts would call "Lawn-Mower Parents" and quite frankly it disgusts me.

I believe that as a parent you have one ****ing job, and that's to prepare your child to be an adult.

[jallmon]

My granddad was a preacher. When my brother and I were spending the summer at the parsonage, we got caught at the local store shoplifting some bb's. He picked us up at the store, took us back home and kneeled down with us and prayed for us.

That was almost 60 years ago, and it still makes me feel terrible when I think of how much it hurt him.

My parents, on the other hand, spanked the crap out of us. Mom was especially insidious in that she would (gleefully) have us go pick our own switches which she would use on our bare asses.

[Frosty]

Originally Posted by Detoxing

Not to bash on anyone's parents, but some of the stuff being told here i couldn't imagine doing to my kid. For what? A lot of it sounds more like a parent being a dick and venting frustration than it does teaching a lesson.

I'm a first born and my parents were very young and immature when I was born. In fact, I was more than a year old before my dad ever saw me because he was stationed in Korea right after my parents were married and my mom became pregnant with me (I wasn't planned). He admits it was very hard for him to go from partying it up with his army buddies to being an insta-parent. Most of the stuff they did to me didn't happen with my much younger siblings, except for the constant cutting remarks that still happen to this day (and the reason my kids have never been close to their Grandpa).

I didn't want to parent my kids the same way. I did try spanking my oldest a couple of times but found in a hurry it wasn't effective. I found it worked much better to be reasonable with both of them and treat them like rational people (not when toddlers of course but not much older than that). Maybe my kids are unique but we've never had any issues with them and they are productive adults now. We didn't even go through the asshole teenager stage with them.

[Frosty]

Originally Posted by Detoxing

Have any of ya'll ever looked at the different parenting types and assessed what kind of parent you are?

I believe my views line up closer to what they call a "Free-Range Parent".

After Googling that, I think we are/were Free Range Parents with a little Tiger thrown in.

[Johnny Vegas]

Dad would swat my ass and if I ever blocked my ass I’d get more. Shovel snow off a long ass driveway.

Mom wouldn’t drop me off/pick me up from the bus after school and had to walk a very hilly 1 1/2 miles to the house. Except if weather got under 20 she’d be there for the ride.

[ModSocks]

Originally Posted by Frosty

After Googling that, I think we are/were Free Range Parents with a little Tiger thrown in.

Did you read about Lawnmower parents? My Sister in law is one of those (She's a ****ing ultra progressive and doesn't realize it) and we've had some serious words over our children's interactions. We're on completely different sides of the spectrum here.

Sorry, just kinda venting here as this drama is fresh, and it's my first parenting drama ever.

Like i said, i believe your job as a parent is to prepare the kid to be an adult. In order to grow and develop you have to let the kid be challenged in life. Challenge promotes growth. Like a muscle. Your job is not to protect a child from hurt feelings, but instead to teach a child how to cope with hurt feelings so that they're better prepared to deal with it the next time it happens.

My sister in law otoh, is out of ****ing control with her sensitivity and lawnmower parenting.

I know i'm saying too much airing my greivences on a Chiefs forum, but **** it im venting.

For example: The other day my boy's cousins were over. My boy, 12, his cousins being 10, 8,7 and the youngest, 6. My boy and the 6 year old are boys, the rest girls. They decide to play a game of "House". And they've all kinda picked their make-believe ages and roles. One child decides she wants to be the youngest. The 6 year old though (my sister in law's son) decides HE wants to be the youngest. My son asks that he pick a different age as someone had already requested to be the youngest.

Pretty standard kid shit, right? Please correct me if im wrong.

Well, little man (her son) does not like being told no, and throws a tantrum and runs to mom to tell her that his cousins are being mean to him. (This is incredibly common, so common that i instructed my son to remove himself from the situation as to not make the problem worse) My son walked away and came over to hang out with the adults not wanting to deal with little dude and is over-protective mom.

Mom (my sister in law) comes over to my son, face blushed red, angry, eyes watered, chin quivering and with a shaky voice and scolds my son for "Bullying".

Bullying, dude. Bullying.

Her reason? Because my son attempted to make her son play within the parameters of the game they were all playing, and left when her son got triggered, thus causing the other kids to also follow my son, thus leaving her boy with no one to play with (he didn't ask the other kids to follow him, he was doing what i told him to do) that was a form of bullying.

I shit you not.

Now maybe i'm wrong. But personally, i think she's ****ing nuts.

[displacedinMN]

Detox--I believe no discipline is worse than discipline.

Your sister in law in not doing the kid any favors by letting the kid throw a tantrum and be over protective. It is not bullying. She is a Snowplow. Knocking every obstacle out of the way for her kid.

I see a lot of parents that do nothing then come down like a ton of bricks and have nothing to back it up.

There is a happy medium. More people need to find it.

[BucEyedPea]

Originally Posted by Flachief58

Mom was the instgater, dad was the ruthless enforcer. Mostly with his western style belt but if that wasn't handy, whatever was close. If the laws were the same then as they are now, my brother and I would have been in foster care and my dad would have served some major time. I swore I wouldn't discipline my kids the way he did us. Although I forgave them both, I'll never forget. Those scars cut too deep

Same with my father because how the laws are today and I never disciplined my kid the same way either. It took me into my 20's to forgive as well not that I actually said that to him, but just didn't think about it anymore or let it bother me. Though from 13-18 I barely spoke to him and always sat furthest away from him at the supper table. I hated him. Yep, it did leave scars but some therapy helped me with it later.

[Megatron96]

Until I was 10 or 12 it was a switch/belt/bamboo back scratcher. Or being grounded. Grounded meant that other than school/sports or chores, I was confined to my room (no TV or radio/stereo back then).

About the time I turned 13 my dad must've gotten tired of whacking me and my brother, because we began receiving "punishment details."

My father was a retired Marine major, and he had a ton of these PDs. Things like cleaning the garage floor with my toothbrush.

Or painting the shed with a one-inch brush, inside and out, three coats.

Or mow the yard with the mechanical push mower:

Something very similar to this.

Then rake the yard with your hands. I developed some pretty good hand-eye coordination doing this a couple times.

I learned to stay out of trouble fairly quickly.

[BucEyedPea]

Is Free-Range Parenting like telling your 9 year old to go out and play and don't come in until dark?

That's how I was raised. Went everywhere, woods, rivers, lakes, pastures and fields, sand dunes, ocean, mountains, uptown, the city, Fenway Park by subway. Gone all day.