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Old 10-18-2018, 07:08 PM   #1
FlaChief58 FlaChief58 is offline
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Originally Posted by Iowanian View Post
I used to date Pats fan's mom.

She was an interesting and talented lady.

My favorite part was on rainy nights, she would turn a lamp on, set it on the floor and turn off all of the other lights as she removed her pants and ease in front of the light so I could muse at her womanly shape. Seductively, she would reach down and grab herself by the meat flaps and twist them into the most amazing shadow puppet show.

It was always impressive as she smooshed it into a turkey neck and I swear....could make a gobble sound from her south mouth. the donkey, the dolphin and the circling buzzard were also pleasing.
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Old 10-18-2018, 07:11 PM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Iowanian View Post
I used to date Pats fan's mom.

She was an interesting and talented lady.

My favorite part was on rainy nights, she would turn a lamp on, set it on the floor and turn off all of the other lights as she removed her pants and ease in front of the light so I could muse at her womanly shape. Seductively, she would reach down and grab herself by the meat flaps and twist them into the most amazing shadow puppet show.

It was always impressive as she smooshed it into a turkey neck and I swear....could make a gobble sound from her south mouth. the donkey, the dolphin and the circling buzzard were also pleasing.


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Look, I dress like a 50 year old lesbian.

http://facebook.com/thepindoctors
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Old 10-19-2018, 08:36 AM   #3
MahiMike MahiMike is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Iowanian View Post
I used to date Pats fan's mom.

She was an interesting and talented lady.

My favorite part was on rainy nights, she would turn a lamp on, set it on the floor and turn off all of the other lights as she removed her pants and ease in front of the light so I could muse at her womanly shape. Seductively, she would reach down and grab herself by the meat flaps and twist them into the most amazing shadow puppet show.

It was always impressive as she smooshed it into a turkey neck and I swear....could make a gobble sound from her south mouth. the donkey, the dolphin and the circling buzzard were also pleasing.
Maybe she worked at that strip club in Boston I went to.
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Old 10-18-2018, 07:10 PM   #4
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Iowanian is cooking with some major fire right now.
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Old 10-18-2018, 07:14 PM   #5
Katipan Katipan is offline
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About the only thing positive about living in Bronco hell is how the local Pats fans are either too chicken shit to display their fidelity or they just don't exist.
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Old 10-18-2018, 07:19 PM   #6
FlaChief58 FlaChief58 is offline
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Originally Posted by Katipan View Post
About the only thing positive about living in Bronco hell is how the local Pats fans are either too chicken shit to display their fidelity or they just don't exist.
Most have infested Florida. Them and the loud mouth new yorkers who think they're the greatest thing since sliced bread. Annoying ****s
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Old 10-18-2018, 07:36 PM   #7
Katipan Katipan is offline
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Most have infested Florida. Them and the loud mouth new yorkers who think they're the greatest thing since sliced bread. Annoying ****s
Pats fans are all geriatric or just naturally drawn to people with painkillers?
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Old 10-18-2018, 07:39 PM   #8
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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Pats fans are all geriatric or just naturally drawn to people with painkillers?

That's not it at all..

Pats fans like Florida because they are drawn to the odor of the pails of day old soiled adult diapers remind them of home.
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Old 10-18-2018, 07:13 PM   #9
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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Lord knows I am peaceful, when I'm left alone.

I've always been an eagle, been a while since I have flown.
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Old 10-18-2018, 07:16 PM   #10
SAUTO SAUTO is offline
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Lord knows I am peaceful, when I'm left alone.

I've always been an eagle, been a while since I have flown.
Spread your wings and fly my man...
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Old 10-18-2018, 07:16 PM   #11
rico rico is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Iowanian View Post
Lord knows I am peaceful, when I'm left alone.

I've always been an eagle, been a while since I have flown.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rausch View Post
Look, I dress like a 50 year old lesbian.

http://facebook.com/thepindoctors
Posts: 13,257
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Old 10-18-2018, 07:13 PM   #12
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Saw a guy at the gym that looked like Tyreek today.

I was gonna tell him his nappy headed look was Tyreek Hill similar.

I stopped when I remembered the backlash I could get from PatriotsPlanet.
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Old 10-18-2018, 07:34 PM   #13
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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At the time I was dating Pats Fan mom, I had a friend who was blind.

One night I wanted to do something nice for him, so I had Ms. Patsfan mom turn on some music. As we danced I placed a blindfold on her face and laid her down on the sofa bed. I worked the combination on her panty lock and off they came. I slowly began press down on the mattress between her hairy toed feet, but I stepped back, and led my friend, the Ronnie Milsap-American into my place. He eased up, spit on his index finger and pushed it into her 2 chute clear to the top knuckle.

Suddenly, he recoiled, pulled away and sat back onto a chair. Oblivious that his finger looked like he had been tarring a roof, he reached for and gulped a glass of lukewarm water he found on the coffee table. He was pale as a sheet and looked like he was going to be ill.

He said "you know I'm blind right"
"sure man" I retorted.
"you know I can read braille"
"I assumed"

"well....when I put my finger in there, the polyps read "Tom Brady has no soul".
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Old 10-18-2018, 07:44 PM   #14
rico rico is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Iowanian View Post
At the time I was dating Pats Fan mom, I had a friend who was blind.

One night I wanted to do something nice for him, so I had Ms. Patsfan mom turn on some music. As we danced I placed a blindfold on her face and laid her down on the sofa bed. I worked the combination on her panty lock and off they came. I slowly began press down on the mattress between her hairy toed feet, but I stepped back, and led my friend, the Ronnie Milsap-American into my place. He eased up, spit on his index finger and pushed it into her 2 chute clear to the top knuckle.

Suddenly, he recoiled, pulled away and sat back onto a chair. Oblivious that his finger looked like he had been tarring a roof, he reached for and gulped a glass of lukewarm water he found on the coffee table. He was pale as a sheet and looked like he was going to be ill.

He said "you know I'm blind right"
"sure man" I retorted.
"you know I can read braille"
"I assumed"

"well....when I put my finger in there, the polyps read "Tom Brady has no soul".
Iowanian on a roll!!!

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tl;dr

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rausch View Post
Look, I dress like a 50 year old lesbian.

http://facebook.com/thepindoctors
Posts: 13,257
rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 10-19-2018, 08:40 AM   #15
MahiMike MahiMike is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Iowanian View Post
At the time I was dating Pats Fan mom, I had a friend who was blind.

One night I wanted to do something nice for him, so I had Ms. Patsfan mom turn on some music. As we danced I placed a blindfold on her face and laid her down on the sofa bed. I worked the combination on her panty lock and off they came. I slowly began press down on the mattress between her hairy toed feet, but I stepped back, and led my friend, the Ronnie Milsap-American into my place. He eased up, spit on his index finger and pushed it into her 2 chute clear to the top knuckle.

Suddenly, he recoiled, pulled away and sat back onto a chair. Oblivious that his finger looked like he had been tarring a roof, he reached for and gulped a glass of lukewarm water he found on the coffee table. He was pale as a sheet and looked like he was going to be ill.

He said "you know I'm blind right"
"sure man" I retorted.
"you know I can read braille"
"I assumed"

"well....when I put my finger in there, the polyps read "Tom Brady has no soul".
Gold!
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