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Old 10-26-2020, 02:08 PM  
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Suicide
I found out today that a good friend of mine from high school committed suicide last night. This has never happened to someone I knew closely.

I'm not sure how to process the emotions I'm feeling.
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Old 10-26-2020, 02:59 PM   #16
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He didn't happen to have two teenage sons did he?
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Old 10-26-2020, 03:02 PM   #17
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He didn't happen to have two teenage sons did he?
No.
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Old 10-26-2020, 03:05 PM   #18
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Originally Posted by TLO View Post
I've had friends die in car accidents.
I've had a family member OD.

This just feels... different. I can't fully process the emotions. Mostly I just feel numb.
The thing is that you, as someone who would never do that, will never understand the thought process that went into the decision.

It's not a very helpful answer for what you're going through but like Mac459 said, it's best to focus on the good times and the memories.
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Old 10-26-2020, 03:07 PM   #19
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No.
Just checking, thought we may know the same person. An acquaintance of mine offed himself yesterday as well. Sorry for your loss.
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Old 10-26-2020, 03:07 PM   #20
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Not that hard to understand in cases of older people, over 40 etc.
Can't know about everyone but in most cases, they're just finally sick of all the bullshit. Having to work to live, never getting above debt.. you're single and older. You materialistically will never have enough to have a relationship. Either age or health will keep you from getting a living wage job, no matter how hard you try to find one. At a certain point it simply becomes a moralistic business decision.
What's the point of living if every day is the same struggle till you eventually die anyway?
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Old 10-26-2020, 03:07 PM   #21
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I have had 3 friends who have committed suicide. All were lawyers and 2 had pretty substantial alcohol problems, which undoubtedly fed into this. I have had 2 clients facing lengthy sentences who have committed suicide.

All I can say is that suicide leaves a 'hole,' for lack of a better word, for those who remain that is not there when someone dies of cancer. There will always be questions: Should I have seen this? What could I have done differently? Could I have stopped this? Even if there's nothing you could have seen or done, you will always have questions.

I'm really sorry for your loss.
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Old 10-26-2020, 03:34 PM   #22
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My daughter (adult) died April 18, 2020 under unknown illness/OD and they won't know the answer for a while because COVID has labs tied up in upstate NY. April 18 is my birthday, and having my ex-wife call me really surprised me as we divorced over 20 years prior. She told me that they found her dead on the couch. We named her April because she, my ex and I were all born in April.

She did have some medical conditions that seemed to be more of a nuisance the way she kept them to herself. Maybe it all built up. It is a relief that she is out of pain. I don't really care what the lab results are, if you believe we create our own reality, then all deaths are suicide on some level.

I did go to therapy for a couple of months which helped me greatly. We'll see this coming April how my birthday goes (and every one after that). I doubt I will remember it for anything other than April. Hell of a kid.
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Old 10-26-2020, 03:36 PM   #23
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Sorry to hear that. Stuff like that is never easy.
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Old 10-26-2020, 03:45 PM   #24
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Originally Posted by CarlosCarson88 View Post
Not that hard to understand in cases of older people, over 40 etc.
Can't know about everyone but in most cases, they're just finally sick of all the bullshit. Having to work to live, never getting above debt.. you're single and older. You materialistically will never have enough to have a relationship. Either age or health will keep you from getting a living wage job, no matter how hard you try to find one. At a certain point it simply becomes a moralistic business decision.
What's the point of living if every day is the same struggle till you eventually die anyway?
This person was 31
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Old 10-26-2020, 03:48 PM   #25
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Originally Posted by jallmon View Post
My daughter (adult) died April 18, 2020 under unknown illness/OD and they won't know the answer for a while because COVID has labs tied up in upstate NY. April 18 is my birthday, and having my ex-wife call me really surprised me as we divorced over 20 years prior. She told me that they found her dead on the couch. We named her April because she, my ex and I were all born in April.

She did have some medical conditions that seemed to be more of a nuisance the way she kept them to herself. Maybe it all built up. It is a relief that she is out of pain. I don't really care what the lab results are, if you believe we create our own reality, then all deaths are suicide on some level.

I did go to therapy for a couple of months which helped me greatly. We'll see this coming April how my birthday goes (and every one after that). I doubt I will remember it for anything other than April. Hell of a kid.

Wow, sorry to hear about that as well.
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Old 10-26-2020, 03:52 PM   #26
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This person was 31
Yes. Like I said, not true in all cases of course.
31 is still an adult who deals with pressure.
But at 31 there should still be an amount of hope there.
So depression might be pretty severe for what ever reasons at that age.
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Old 10-26-2020, 03:54 PM   #27
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Can this thread be stickied mods ?


OMG I'm sorry to hear that I lost a friend a couple years ago and he left behind 4 daughters I'm still shook up about it he was a single dad trying to make it.



I'm here for you brother pm me if you want to vent or anything I understand.
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Old 10-26-2020, 04:10 PM   #28
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You have lots of friends here TLO and lots of people care and same with the others in this thread that have had to deal with things like this.



Even for me with my attempts the thoughts get so powerful or overwhelming at times there is no hope and when hope is lost that is the end for a lot of people. Always have hope in life.
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Old 10-26-2020, 04:11 PM   #29
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Originally Posted by CarlosCarson88 View Post
Yes. Like I said, not true in all cases of course.
31 is still an adult who deals with pressure.
But at 31 there should still be an amount of hope there.
So depression might be pretty severe for what ever reasons at that age.
I've battled with depression my whole life. I've never come close to actually killing myself. Has it crossed my mind? Yes. Did I ever feel like I was remotely close to acting on it? No.

I can't imagine what makes a person go to that level.
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Old 10-26-2020, 04:13 PM   #30
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You have lots of friends here TLO and lots of people care and same with the others in this thread that have had to deal with things like this.



Even for me with my attempts the thoughts get so powerful or overwhelming at times there is no hope and when hope is lost that is the end for a lot of people. Always have hope in life.
I appreciate that. It's primarily why I started the thread in the first place. Unfortunately, I knew there would be others that have gone through what I'm going through now.
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