Hypothetical: Helping people versus screwing people over.

[Bearcat]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

I must say, I'm shocked at these results. 14% of you would sacrifice a Class-B friendship to help out a Class-A friend? And 25% would sacrifice a Class-C friendship for that purpose? And perhaps the most shocking of all, 65% would sacrifice a Class-D friend? Wow.

My philosophy is that a Class-A friend wouldn't expect you to destroy relationships to help them, so there's no harm done if you don't. I voted no on everything but the Class-G friendly stranger, and even then I felt kind of bad about it.

I voted no for B and C, but yes to the rest of them... I took D as one of those facebook friends who you might have initially chatted with when the connection was made, but otherwise hardly ever chat with online and might not even remember the last time you were interested in one of their updates or even noticed one.

I'd feel somewhat bad knowing they were on the wrong end of it, but C seemed to be the cutoff as far as those who really mean anything to you... in my mind, there's a pretty good gap between C and D, and there's not a huge difference between screwing over a D friend and a stranger (who might very well be D-friend material).

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by Bearcat

I voted no for B and C, but yes to the rest of them... I took D as one of those facebook friends who you might have initially chatted with when the connection was made, but otherwise hardly ever chat with online and might not even remember the last time you were interested in one of their updates or even noticed one.

I'd feel somewhat bad knowing they were on the wrong end of it, but C seemed to be the cutoff as far as those who really mean anything to you... in my mind, there's a pretty good gap between C and D, and there's not a huge difference between screwing over a D friend and a stranger (who might very well be D-friend material).

Online relationships complicate the question a little. I was assuming that a Class-D friend would be someone who you see in social situations with some regularity because you run in the same social circle. You know their name and remember them and they seem nice, but you're not going to seek them out.

This poll is enlightening to me in a depressing way. If I can help a friend by screwing over a nameless, faceless stranger, obviously I will. But I sure wouldn't convert someone in my social circle into an enemy in a situation that is optional.

[Bearcat]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

Online relationships complicate the question a little. I was assuming that a Class-D friend would be someone who you see in social situations with some regularity because you run in the same social circle. You know their name and remember them and they seem nice, but you're not going to seek them out.

This poll is enlightening to me in a depressing way. If I can help a friend by screwing over a nameless, faceless stranger, obviously I will. But I sure wouldn't convert someone in my social circle into an enemy in a situation that is optional.

In that case, it might also depend on whether the A friend and D friend run in the same circle as well.

On one hand, if they know each other and I tell A about an opportunity and mention D has already expressed interest, it then pretty much falls on A to decide if they're going to screw D... OTOH, I'd still feel bad, since it would destroy a couple of friendships. In that case, I'd probably lean towards staying quiet.

If A doesn't know D, then I think I'd be more likely to tell A and then deal with the fallout of D... except maybe if D is an A friend of one of my other A or B friends... I mean, I only see some people when hanging out with an A/B friend, so that's significantly different than perhaps someone I see due to some other link (a friend of a friend at a tailgate, a former coworker who I didn't work closely with, etc).

[Beef Supreme]

This poll reads like the instructions to that Korean-made bicycle you are putting together at 3 a.m. Christmas morning.

[pr_capone]

Originally Posted by BigChiefTablet

This poll reads like the instructions to that Korean-made bicycle you are putting together at 3 a.m. Christmas morning.

[Predarat]

The thing I am worried about, most likely people on here consider most other ChiefPlanet posters to be class D or lower. Be scared, very scared. And be afraid too.

[BigCatDaddy]

Target is better than K-Mart?

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by BigCatDaddy

Target is better than K-Mart?

Only because K-Mart didn't leverage Jaclyn Smith properly.

[ExtremeChief]

Not interested in the poll but I did see an apricot BMW convertable Saturday.

[RealSNR]

Class F and Class G are gonna get screwed over. Everyone else, no.

The way I'm reading the information in the OP is that this is just one-upping in a quest to get something nice. I'm not burning this person's house down or having sex with his wife or anything.

It's like on The Price Is Right when you bid $1 over the previous contestant. It's legal, it happens all the time, and if you didn't do it, somebody else would. It's a screw over, yes, but I'm not necessarily doing harm to this person to favor my Class A friend.

So if my occasional acquaintance that I see in the hall on Tuesdays doesn't like it, that's just too bad. I didn't do anything wrong. About the worst thing that can happen is they unfriend me on Facebook, in which case they were probably one of those friends I had who posts chains of stuff like "LIKE AND SHARE THIS STATUS IF YOU VALUE HUMAN LIFE." They probably wouldn't have survived the next friend purge anyway.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by SNR

Class F and Class G are gonna get screwed over. Everyone else, no.

The way I'm reading the information in the OP is that this is just one-upping in a quest to get something nice. I'm not burning this person's house down or having sex with his wife or anything.

It's like on The Price Is Right when you bid $1 over the previous contestant. It's legal, it happens all the time, and if you didn't do it, somebody else would. It's a screw over, yes, but I'm not necessarily doing harm to this person to favor my Class A friend.

So if my occasional acquaintance that I see in the hall on Tuesdays doesn't like it, that's just too bad. I didn't do anything wrong. About the worst thing that can happen is they unfriend me on Facebook, in which case they were probably one of those friends I had who posts chains of stuff like "LIKE AND SHARE THIS STATUS IF YOU VALUE HUMAN LIFE." They probably wouldn't have survived the next friend purge anyway.

I'm probably understating it a little bit. Here's the situation, with some details changed for confidentiality.

An acquaintance of mine has a Class-D friend/co-worker (maybe Class C, not sure) who is up for a promotion at work to a vacant position and is kind of the default choice (and wants it). These two people are in different work groups but have an overlap in their social circles.

However, he has a Class-A friend who is out of work, and he's been going all out to influence the management team to give the Class-A the job, and it's more out of friendship than any work reason. The Class-D friend is aware of this and is doing a slow burn, and word is spreading among the social circle to the detriment of my acquaintance.

I don't think he means harm to the Class-D and is just stoked about helping out his Class-A homie, but he is harming the Class-D and I think he's causing himself some damage in the larger social circle. It's kind of painful to watch, though I'm distant enough that I'm not going to get involved.

[Predarat]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

I'm probably understating it a little bit. Here's the situation, with some details changed for confidentiality.

An acquaintance of mine has a Class-D friend/co-worker (maybe Class C, not sure) who is up for a promotion at work to a vacant position and is kind of the default choice (and wants it). These two people are in different work groups but have an overlap in their social circles.

However, he has a Class-A friend who is out of work, and he's been going all out to influence the management team to give the Class-A the job, and it's more out of friendship than any work reason. The Class-D friend is aware of this and is doing a slow burn, and word is spreading among the social circle to the detriment of my acquaintance.

I don't think he means harm to the Class-D and is just stoked about helping out his Class-A homie, but he is harming the Class-D and I think he's causing himself some damage in the larger social circle. It's kind of painful to watch, though I'm distant enough that I'm not going to get involved.

I may be over simplifying but since Class-A is totally out of work, can Class-D get the promotion, and Class-A fill the vacancy Class-D leaves?

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by Predarat

I may be over simplifying but since Class-A is totally out of work, can Class-D get the promotion, and Class-A fill the vacancy Class-D leaves?

You'd think. But that's not how it's playing out.

[Predarat]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

You'd think. But that's not how it's playing out.

Another oh shit about this, I assume Class D will get interviewed and considered for the position regardless of Class A so if the acquaintance jilts Class D, Class D gets the job over Class A, Class A is still out of work, he is in a lose/lose situation. Especially if the promotion puts Class D in a position of authority over him. Yikes.

[Bearcat]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

I'm probably understating it a little bit. Here's the situation, with some details changed for confidentiality.

An acquaintance of mine has a Class-D friend/co-worker (maybe Class C, not sure) who is up for a promotion at work to a vacant position and is kind of the default choice (and wants it). These two people are in different work groups but have an overlap in their social circles.

However, he has a Class-A friend who is out of work, and he's been going all out to influence the management team to give the Class-A the job, and it's more out of friendship than any work reason. The Class-D friend is aware of this and is doing a slow burn, and word is spreading among the social circle to the detriment of my acquaintance.

I don't think he means harm to the Class-D and is just stoked about helping out his Class-A homie, but he is harming the Class-D and I think he's causing himself some damage in the larger social circle. It's kind of painful to watch, though I'm distant enough that I'm not going to get involved.

IMO, letting the A know about the job and even putting a good word in for him isn't out of bounds in that case, but really going all out might be bad form. Putting myself in the D's shoes, I wouldn't be upset if a coworker recommended an out of work best friend for a position that I was looking at, unless perhaps they were looking at bending some rules, like if the position was up for internal employees only.

If I was the D, I wouldn't destroy the relationship if the guy's friend got the job... a lot of positions are about who you know, and just as I've used connections to help land jobs, I've probably been passed over for someone with better connections.