How classic was your childhood?

[Rain Man]

Prison Bitch's fishing thread got me wondering. How classic was your childhood? Take the enclosed poll to find out, and then let us know how many you checked off the list.

Rules: Count only things that you did BEFORE the age of 13.

Disclaimer: I'm a guy so I don't know what girls did before the age of 13. However, I suspect there's significant overlap so hopefully this list is reasonable for people of all chromosomes.


You can summarize your childhood score here:

45 or higher - Your childhood was so American that it was actually Australian.
40 to 44 - Your childhood was classic American and not a pansy soft American. You're an American who eats steak.
35 to 39 - Your childhood was classic American, but probably from one of the coastal states
30 to 34 - Your childhood might be classic American, but more likely it was Canadian.
25 to 29 - Your childhood was more European than American, but one of the tougher central Europe states like Germany or Slovakia. Or maybe Iceland.
20 to 24 - Your childhood was probably English.
15 to 19 - Your childhood was probably French.
10 to 14 - Your childhood was probably Japanese or some other place that's fundamentally different.
9 or lower - Your childhood was probably in one of those bubbles due to an immune system failure.

[ShiftyEyedWaterboy]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

May I presume that you're one of the three people in the poll who did not build a snowman in their youth?

You're an astute one.

[ShiftyEyedWaterboy]

Originally Posted by Baby Lee

How bayou is bayou?

Spent a lot of summers in the W.Monroe/Chatham/Ruston area where my mom's family is.

So awesome that camping consists of pulling the pickup off the highway and setting trot lines on the bank for fish [and the occasional turtle].

My uncle went everywhere with the trolling boat on the roof, shotguns in the rear window, and Coleman stoves and bedrolls in the truck bed. We were never more than 5 minutes from hunting and fishing adventure [well, hunting in the fall, just plain shooting shit in the summer].

Small world. I'm from Monroe. Right on Bayou Desiard. So sort of bayou. Not quite the same as way down south but the area I lived on was pretty damn swampy. My mother's side is from Houma and I spent a lot of time around there too. Northern LA is great if you're an outdoorsman. Probably no better place for it.

[Rasputin]

Inner tubing down snow slides at winter camp in Colorado mountains.
Zoom

[Nickhead]

there are either 3 liars on this board, or they should never tell a soul again they had sex with a teacher.

[DJ's left nut]

Originally Posted by Frazod

My bad bike ramp story involved landing wrong - it jarred me and my face went into the metal bar between the handlebars. Broke off parts of both my front teeth, the space resembling an inverted V. Had to have both teeth capped.

Mom sure was pissed about the extra dentist bill.

My bike ramp story was a ramp at the bottom of my neighbors driveway. His driveway went along the side of the house, down the hill and back behind the house where they had a big concrete pad where you turned around into the garage (lots of houses built in the 60s/70s seemed to do that; perfect spot for a basketball hoop).

I came flying down the hill and hit the ramp just as his older brother came around the corner of the garage right into the flight path. It was a completely blind corner; nothing either of us could do (well, I suppose we could not set up ramps just before blind corners but I digress). I tried to bail off the bike to keep from just plowing through him. It mostly frisbeed out from under me, I hit the ground and scraped off pretty much every piece of flesh I had from my knees to my ankles, he took the rear tire square in the neck and fell into a heap. We thought we'd killed him. He could hardly talk a week later and needless to say we were not allowed to ramp bikes anymore.

Good ol' Blue BMX; that sumbitch took a beating, man.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by Nickhead

there are either 3 liars on this board, or they should never tell a soul again they had sex with a teacher.

No one has told us stories about that particular question. I want to know.

And I never made a bike ramp. It seemed imprudent.

[Frazod]

Originally Posted by DJ's left nut

My bike ramp story was a ramp at the bottom of my neighbors driveway. His driveway went along the side of the house, down the hill and back behind the house where they had a big concrete pad where you turned around into the garage (lots of houses built in the 60s/70s seemed to do that; perfect spot for a basketball hoop).

I came flying down the hill and hit the ramp just as his older brother came around the corner of the garage right into the flight path. It was a completely blind corner; nothing either of us could do (well, I suppose we could not set up ramps just before blind corners but I digress). I tried to bail off the bike to keep from just plowing through him. It mostly frisbeed out from under me, I hit the ground and scraped off pretty much every piece of flesh I had from my knees to my ankles, he took the rear tire square in the neck and fell into a heap. We thought we'd killed him. He could hardly talk a week later and needless to say we were not allowed to ramp bikes anymore.

Good ol' Blue BMX; that sumbitch took a beating, man.

This did not happen to me, thank God, but to one of my friends. While riding his bike down a steep street in Jeff City, he hit something that basically made the bike stop but he kept going. He was wearing shorts and shoes, and nothing else, and landed spread eagle on the asphalt, sliding a good distance afterward. The entire front of his body - face, chest, arms, legs, the whole nine yards - was pretty much turned to raw hamburger. I did not see it, and I'm glad for that. He was bandaged up like a ****ing mummy afterward.

The most interesting part - he had this one wound near the base of the palm of his hand that would not heal. Just kept oozing blood and puss. One day, in church, he was messing with it and felt something strange. He started pushing on the underside of his forearm, and eventually worked a three inch long sliver of glass out of the cut. It had been there for a couple of weeks.

Eww.

[Easy 6]

39 - can hardly complain about my childhood

[scho63]

soon to be 54

Has anyone mentioned building stuff from popsicle sticks?

How about making a clay ashtray or cups in art class?

How about old soda or beer can pull tabs and join them together?

Black light posters?

How about melting drinking straws?

[scho63]

My list: 41 items

I did make out with a super hot teacher named Miss Walsh the summer of the year I graduated. She and several other hot teachers went to a packed bar in Belmar NJ called Montego Bay. She got drunk drinking Jack and coke and during one of the slower dances we started making out. The bar was jam packed and somewhat dark so it was easy to be discreet. Then one of the other teachers finally saw this and yanked me off of her. She was around 24 at the time and I was 17.

Built a sand castle or other sand structure on a beach
Built a snowman
Camped in your backyard
Carried a lunch box to school
Eaten food cooked over a campfire
Explored an abandoned house or hobo camp with your friends
Fired a bb gun
Got into a physical fight on a school playground
Had a bike wreck
Had a crush on a babysitter
Had a line in a school play
Had an entry in a Science Fair
Had your own treehouse
Jumped off a diving board, high dive, cliff or rope swing into water
Went to Disneyland/Disneyworld/Epcot
Collected some type of sports cards or collector cards
Kissed a person (on the lips) of whatever sex you now like
Lit sparklers and carried them around
Looked at pornography
Mowed a non-relative’s lawn for money (or shoveled a non-relative’s walk for money)
Operated a lemonade stand
Owned a science kit of some sort (chemistry, electricity, etc.)
Owned an optical science tool - telescope or microscope
Owned Legos, Lincoln Logs, or an erector set
Participated in a spelling bee
Played doctor with a person of whatever sex you now like
Played in a youth sports league
Ran away from home and stayed away at least four hours
Rode a dirt bike (as the driver, not passenger)
Rode a school bus
Rode your bike to a store to buy stuff
Sold something (candy, cookies, light bulbs, etc.) as a youth fundraiser
Spent 1+ weeks at a relative’s house without your parents for no particular reason
Swam in a river or creek
Took dance lessons
Took swimming lessons
Visited a water park
Walked to/from school on your own
Went on a road trip in a station wagon or minivan
Went to a sleepover (or hosted one)
Went to an overnight summer camp

[Easy 6]

Originally Posted by scho63

soon to be 54

Has anyone mentioned building stuff from popsicle sticks?

How about making a clay ashtray or cups in art class?

How about old soda or beer can pull tabs and join them together?

Black light posters?

How about melting drinking straws?

Cant remember making anything from popsicle sticks, but I was a serious architect with some Lincoln Logs

Mom enrolled me in a pottery class one summer, that was pretty cool

I've made a pull tab necklace

Whats with the melted straws?

[Baby Lee]

Originally Posted by scho63

How about making a clay ashtray or cups in art class?

I have [well, my mom has in her china cabinet] a clay 'figurine' that should by all rights be a modern art masterpiece.

Made in 1st or 2nd grade. Supposed to by a kangaroo. Basically a craggy misshapen ball of clay about the size of a small coffee mug, with flat little feet and little T-rex arms. The head is actually pretty decent with the snout and ears [and the one way people can tell what it is by looking at it]. Then a big thumbprint indention in the middle that's supposed to be a pouch.

For some reason I painted it dark olive green before they fired it.


Ultra-hasty [from memory] rendering

[SAUTO]

Originally Posted by DJ's left nut

My bike ramp story was a ramp at the bottom of my neighbors driveway. His driveway went along the side of the house, down the hill and back behind the house where they had a big concrete pad where you turned around into the garage (lots of houses built in the 60s/70s seemed to do that; perfect spot for a basketball hoop).

I came flying down the hill and hit the ramp just as his older brother came around the corner of the garage right into the flight path. It was a completely blind corner; nothing either of us could do (well, I suppose we could not set up ramps just before blind corners but I digress). I tried to bail off the bike to keep from just plowing through him. It mostly frisbeed out from under me, I hit the ground and scraped off pretty much every piece of flesh I had from my knees to my ankles, he took the rear tire square in the neck and fell into a heap. We thought we'd killed him. He could hardly talk a week later and needless to say we were not allowed to ramp bikes anymore.

Good ol' Blue BMX; that sumbitch took a beating, man.

We had the same driveway configuration, first tie I ever rode, a motorcycle we push started it and they told me to hold it wide open until it started. I didn't ever let off, full bore into the railroad ties around the garden.

Fun times.

[Frazod]

I went berserk in ceramics class. Inspired by the recent release of the original Conan the Barbarian, I made a sword and a functional spiked ball and chain that actually survived for a couple of weeks before I swung it around once too often. After that, the teacher told me that no further weapons would be produced in his class. I assume that if somebody tried that today cops and counselors would be involved, but back in 1982 Kirksville, it was merely twisted.

Another really cool item I made was a baseball-sized Ms. Pacman - that turned out nearly perfect - yellow with big red lips and tongue and a big red bow on top. I wish I'd taken a picture of it. There was a girl we all referred to as Ms. Pacman because she was loud, blonde, and never shut up. I gave it to her more as an insult than anything else, but she was also rather dense, so she just thought it was a neat present.

[Easy 6]

Always loved picking beans and peas with Grandma in the garden, then we'd sit on the porch and snap the beans or empty out the pea pods... just simple shit like that is such a fond memory