Other Sports Gladiator 2018 - Round 1, Match 17 - Pasta Giant Meatball versus cabletech94

**Rain Man** · 07-09-2018, 10:17 AM

Vote for the person that you think would win this match in a battle to death or submission. As background, assume that prior to the tournament you received 10 minutes of training on every weapon. The time listed is the amount of time before the match where you learn what the weaponry and venue is.

Venue - Inside a giant hamster ball that is rolling down a 1 degree slope
Starting Distance - 4 feet

Pasta Giant Meatball

Main Weapon - Pilgrim-style blunderbuss with supplies for three shots (first shot is loaded)
Backup Weapon - None

Prep Time - 3 Minutes
Special Factors - A drunk average-sized college guy will help you, though he's unarmed and is having trouble standing.

cabletech94

Main Weapon - Sling shot with 20 golf ball-size stones
Backup Weapon - Shiv fashioned from a toothbrush and a wooden chair leg

Prep Time - 43 seconds
Special Factors - None

**The Franchise** · 07-09-2018, 10:25 AM

Should be a pretty quick match. PGM can shove the drunk college guy into cabletech and then shoot him in the head with the blunderbuss that's already loaded.

**Dartgod** · 07-09-2018, 10:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pestilence

Should be a pretty quick match. PGM can shove the drunk college guy into cabletech and then shoot him in the head with the blunderbuss that's already loaded.

If he somehow misses though, he's toast.

**Dartgod** · 07-09-2018, 10:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pestilence

Should be a pretty quick match. PGM can shove the drunk college guy into cabletech and then shoot him in the head with the blunderbuss that's already loaded.

If he somehow misses though, he's toast.

ModSocks · 07-09-2018, 10:32 AM

Going Cabletech.

That rolling hamster ball is going to be like trying to fight in a dryer once their weight starts shifting and getting it moving. The first thing Cabletech will do is try and grab the blunderbuss so PGM can't shoot it. The drunk guy will be a floor obstacle, neither contestant will be able to stand upright.

The shiv is the best weapon here, because unlike the gun, it can be used over and over and over again while they're being turned around and upside down.

TLO · 07-09-2018, 11:00 AM

What's the average reload time on a blunderbuss?

Also, I can't imagine it's all that accurate.

This is a bit of a thinker.

**Rain Man** · 07-09-2018, 11:04 AM

This is a tough one. Pasta gets an initial shot at very short range, but I suspect that cabletech can knock away the gun barrel. He's at a disadvantage because he's going to have a drunk frat guy pawing at him, but I agree with the assertion that the shiv then becomes the best individual weapon.

However, I then remembered that the blunderbuss isn't just a shooting weapon, but it's a pretty good club. With the help of the drunk college guy, I think Pasta ends up doing some sort of mafia bludgeoning with the gun butt to take the win.

**Rain Man** · 07-09-2018, 11:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TLO

What's the average reload time on a blunderbuss?

Also, I can't imagine it's all that accurate.

This is a bit of a thinker.

I would assume that we're talking at least a minute under normal conditions, but it would be much harder inside the rolling ball.

Graystoke · 07-09-2018, 11:11 AM

So the shiv is a sharpened toothbrush?

I mean stabby is stabby and in this case stabby wins.

Why Not? · 07-09-2018, 11:32 AM

Gotta go shiv here

Sofa King · 07-09-2018, 12:20 PM

Blunderbuss

MagicHef · 07-09-2018, 12:25 PM

Can I have weight and dimensions on the hamster wheel? I'd like to try to determine how fast it will roll and how well they will be able to affect its movement by shifting their weight.

**Rain Man** · 07-09-2018, 12:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MagicHef

Can I have weight and dimensions on the hamster wheel? I'd like to try to determine how fast it will roll and how well they will be able to affect its movement by shifting their weight.

I would presume that it looks like this, but that it's a 9 foot diameter or thereabouts.

Pablo · 07-09-2018, 12:41 PM

pasta's gonna miss and blow a hole in that hamster ball right away. It's gonna deflate and they'll be trapped in a deflating plastic prison where shanks rule the day. cable stabs him and the drunk guy to death and then cuts his way out.

TLO · 07-09-2018, 12:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pablo

pasta's gonna miss and blow a hole in that hamster ball right away. It's gonna deflate and they'll be trapped in a deflating plastic prison where shanks rule the day. cable stabs him and the drunk guy to death and then cuts his way out.

I like this answer

ThaVirus · 07-09-2018, 12:44 PM

Peek gets distracted shitposting in the KnowMo thread while Tech goes Gerard Butler on his neck in Law Abiding Citizen with the shiv

View Poll Results: Who wins?
Pasta Giant Meatball	25	41.67%
cabletech94	35	58.33%
Voters: 60. You may not vote on this poll

07-09-2018, 10:17 AM
Rain Man NFL's #1 Ermines Fan Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $3338491 VARSITY	Gladiator 2018 - Round 1, Match 17 - Pasta Giant Meatball versus cabletech94 Vote for the person that you think would win this match in a battle to death or submission. As background, assume that prior to the tournament you received 10 minutes of training on every weapon. The time listed is the amount of time before the match where you learn what the weaponry and venue is. Venue - Inside a giant hamster ball that is rolling down a 1 degree slope Starting Distance - 4 feet Pasta Giant Meatball Main Weapon - Pilgrim-style blunderbuss with supplies for three shots (first shot is loaded) Backup Weapon - None Prep Time - 3 Minutes Special Factors - A drunk average-sized college guy will help you, though he's unarmed and is having trouble standing. cabletech94 Main Weapon - Sling shot with 20 golf ball-size stones Backup Weapon - Shiv fashioned from a toothbrush and a wooden chair leg Prep Time - 43 seconds Special Factors - None
Posts: 141,316

07-09-2018, 10:25 AM	#2
The Franchise Most Valuable Villain Join Date: Dec 2006 Casino cash: $3125047	Should be a pretty quick match. PGM can shove the drunk college guy into cabletech and then shoot him in the head with the blunderbuss that's already loaded.
Posts: 92,061

07-09-2018, 10:32 AM	#5
ModSocks Needs more middle fingers Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: San Diego Casino cash: $4294563	Going Cabletech. That rolling hamster ball is going to be like trying to fight in a dryer once their weight starts shifting and getting it moving. The first thing Cabletech will do is try and grab the blunderbuss so PGM can't shoot it. The drunk guy will be a floor obstacle, neither contestant will be able to stand upright. The shiv is the best weapon here, because unlike the gun, it can be used over and over and over again while they're being turned around and upside down. __________________ It's O'side or No side, baby.
Posts: 64,256	1 0

07-09-2018, 11:00 AM	#6
TLO Life is changing.. Join Date: Jul 2012 Location: NW Missouri Casino cash: $1934900	What's the average reload time on a blunderbuss? Also, I can't imagine it's all that accurate. This is a bit of a thinker.
Posts: 38,901

07-09-2018, 11:04 AM	#7
Rain Man NFL's #1 Ermines Fan Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: My house Casino cash: $3338491 VARSITY	This is a tough one. Pasta gets an initial shot at very short range, but I suspect that cabletech can knock away the gun barrel. He's at a disadvantage because he's going to have a drunk frat guy pawing at him, but I agree with the assertion that the shiv then becomes the best individual weapon. However, I then remembered that the blunderbuss isn't just a shooting weapon, but it's a pretty good club. With the help of the drunk college guy, I think Pasta ends up doing some sort of mafia bludgeoning with the gun butt to take the win. __________________ I'm putting random letters here as a celebration of free speech: xigrakgrah misorojeq rkemeseit.
Posts: 141,316

07-09-2018, 11:11 AM	#9
Graystoke MVP Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Driftless Region Casino cash: $945564	So the shiv is a sharpened toothbrush? I mean stabby is stabby and in this case stabby wins.
Posts: 8,699	0 1

07-09-2018, 11:32 AM	#10
Why Not? In Search of a Life Join Date: Apr 2013 Location: Kansas Casino cash: $3178994	Gotta go shiv here
Posts: 21,685

07-09-2018, 12:20 PM	#11
Sofa King Hello Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: South Dakota Casino cash: $1092096 VARSITY	Blunderbuss
Posts: 23,208

07-09-2018, 12:25 PM	#12
MagicHef The Seated Villain Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Seattle Casino cash: $2480247	Can I have weight and dimensions on the hamster wheel? I'd like to try to determine how fast it will roll and how well they will be able to affect its movement by shifting their weight. __________________ With a sack in 61% of his games, SB MVP Von Miller is the most consistent pass rusher in NFL history.
Posts: 10,527

07-09-2018, 12:41 PM	#14
Pablo Ultrabanned Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: KCMO Casino cash: $2039356	pasta's gonna miss and blow a hole in that hamster ball right away. It's gonna deflate and they'll be trapped in a deflating plastic prison where shanks rule the day. cable stabs him and the drunk guy to death and then cuts his way out.
Posts: 40,261	3 0

07-09-2018, 12:44 PM	#16
ThaVirus Settle this once and forever Join Date: Sep 2007 Casino cash: $2102369	Peek gets distracted shitposting in the KnowMo thread while Tech goes Gerard Butler on his neck in Law Abiding Citizen with the shiv
Posts: 44,237