Life Why do British people talk like idiots? - Page 2

**RealSNR** · 10-12-2014, 07:03 AM

Yes, I know standard American English isn't perfect. And by "talk like idiots" I'm not talking about stupid people who speak English. I'm talking about how normally intelligent British people CHOOSE to talk like idiots.

For example, here's what one of my Facebook friends from London said in a status: "Gods, tonight's 'Doctor Who' was patchy twaddle."

Patchy twaddle, eh? I'm pretty sure you just made that crap up, as if there aren't hundreds of words you could use to mean "bad." It's the words they choose, as well. They seem to fancy themselves as a literary culture, so they choose words that sound fun. All the baby talk crap we use in Standard American English like "wibbly-wobbly" and "bibbity-boppity" had to have come from the brains of these ****ing weirdos.

And yes, I'm aware that Shakespeare invented hundreds of words used by all speakers of English to this very day. But I don't think he went around using all the new words he invented on the street. They were adapted into the daily use over time.

They didn't zoomy-woomy so quackadilly that before they could say "Bob's your uncle!" that people couldn't bloody cochleante a blimey word they was articulating!

**LoneWolf** · 10-12-2014, 07:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dunerdr

Chalupa batman...

Meaty clackers...

TLO · 10-12-2014, 07:51 AM

Here's a nice list.

http://www.effingpot.com/slang.shtml

**Baby Lee** · 10-12-2014, 07:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Smoke

I can't think of any examples off the top of my head, but I always think the guys on Top Gear say some funny stuff. I like how they use the word cock more often then we do.

Like sipping syrup off Keira Knightley.

Direckshun · 10-12-2014, 08:04 AM

The head of the Nobel Peace Prize committee is actually named Thorbjorn Jagland.

That's his real name.

That's honestly what we should be talking about, here.

DrunkBassGuitar · 10-12-2014, 08:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Simply Red

just some old school English touches. Sometimes they're adding their slang words to a speaking moment.

But overall-->

I actually think they speak better English than the USA - no offense SNR - I certainly get what you're saying w/ their unorthodox style and some additions that make you say 'WTF does that even mean??!!'

But IMO their language is more complete than the English of the USA and more efficient.

eh, I don't think any group can really speak "better" English than any other group. English is a dirty whore of a language. It's not like French or Italian where there is some governing body on the language. English just picks up words from where ever anyway. Your typical english speaker knows thousands of french words without actually knowing how to speak french.

Kidd Lex · 10-12-2014, 08:29 AM

Me thinks the talley whackers seem nice

DrunkBassGuitar · 10-12-2014, 08:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Baby Lee

The only one the truly befuddles me is pronouncing aluminum 'Al-U-Minny-um.'

I guess they hang their hats on the periodic nomenclature, Thorium, Rhobidium, Plutonium, etc.

both are acceptable (per the naming body for chemistry) but aluminium is more common outside of the US.

Lonewolf Ed · 10-12-2014, 08:32 AM

I find British slang and improper accents, such as the Brumie or general northern bastard to be hilarious! That annoying viagra commercial played over and over and over on TBS during the games, for example, would be a riot if some Cockney tart was pitching it instead of the woman that is doing it now.

Oi! Ga' a problem wif the willie, eh? Cont get any starch inna ol' sails? Well, bollocks to that lot! 'Ere is this littul blue pill and it will make you a right terror between'a sheets again! Now Oi'm randy, so come on, throw a leg ovah, ya dirty wee bastard!

Saccopoo · 10-12-2014, 08:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Baby Lee

Quote:
fort·night
ˈfôrtˌnīt/Submit
nounBRITISH
noun: fortnight; plural noun: fortnights
a period of two weeks.
informal
used after the name of a day to indicate that something will take place two weeks after that day.

DrunkBassGuitar · 10-12-2014, 08:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lonewolf Ed

I find British slang and improper accents, such as the Brumie or general northern bastard to be hilarious! That annoying viagra commercial played over and over and over on TBS during the games, for example, would be a riot if some Cockney tart was pitching it instead of the woman that is doing it now.

Oi! Ga' a problem wif the willie, eh? Cont get any starch inna ol' sails? Well, bollocks to that lot! 'Ere is this littul blue pill and it will make you a right terror between'a sheets again! Now Oi'm randy, so come on, throw a leg ovah, ya dirty wee bastard!

That would be the greatest commercial ever.

bdj23 · 10-12-2014, 08:43 AM

U wot m8?

Wallcrawler · 10-12-2014, 08:46 AM

I have a British girl that works for me. She's pretty cool to have around just to listen to her talk.

The one thing that always gets me is the "TH" being pronounced with an "F".

Three becomes free, months becomes monfs, think becomes fink, etc..

Dilly-dally gets thrown around the place quite a bit, and "numpty prat" has become my new call-sign after repeated pranking.

The best mixup in translation from British to American was the other day.

She comes up to me in front of several customers and asks me if I have a spare rubber she can borrow. We all look at her funny, and it takes her an awkwardly long amount of time to get across that she was actually looking for an eraser.

Apparently erasers are called rubbers in England, and condoms are called "Johnnies".

Hilarious.

**Mr. Flopnuts** · 10-12-2014, 08:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lonewolf Ed

I find British slang and improper accents, such as the Brumie or general northern bastard to be hilarious! That annoying viagra commercial played over and over and over on TBS during the games, for example, would be a riot if some Cockney tart was pitching it instead of the woman that is doing it now.

Oi! Ga' a problem wif the willie, eh? Cont get any starch inna ol' sails? Well, bollocks to that lot! 'Ere is this littul blue pill and it will make you a right terror between'a sheets again! Now Oi'm randy, so come on, throw a leg ovah, ya dirty wee bastard!

That is ****ing GREAT!

Direckshun · 10-12-2014, 08:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lonewolf Ed

Oi! Ga' a problem wif the willie, eh? Cont get any starch inna ol' sails? Well, bollocks to that lot! 'Ere is this littul blue pill and it will make you a right terror between'a sheets again! Now Oi'm randy, so come on, throw a leg ovah, ya dirty wee bastard!

That sounds more Austrailian in my head.

Valiant · 10-12-2014, 09:03 AM

Feck off ya pikie wanka..

It is their slang, just like here in the US for the different regions.

10-12-2014, 07:03 AM
RealSNR Special Teams ACE!!! Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Where the hell is SNR Casino cash: $2350208	Why do British people talk like idiots? Yes, I know standard American English isn't perfect. And by "talk like idiots" I'm not talking about stupid people who speak English. I'm talking about how normally intelligent British people CHOOSE to talk like idiots. For example, here's what one of my Facebook friends from London said in a status: "Gods, tonight's 'Doctor Who' was patchy twaddle." Patchy twaddle, eh? I'm pretty sure you just made that crap up, as if there aren't hundreds of words you could use to mean "bad." It's the words they choose, as well. They seem to fancy themselves as a literary culture, so they choose words that sound fun. All the baby talk crap we use in Standard American English like "wibbly-wobbly" and "bibbity-boppity" had to have come from the brains of these ****ing weirdos. And yes, I'm aware that Shakespeare invented hundreds of words used by all speakers of English to this very day. But I don't think he went around using all the new words he invented on the street. They were adapted into the daily use over time. They didn't zoomy-woomy so quackadilly that before they could say "Bob's your uncle!" that people couldn't bloody cochleante a blimey word they was articulating!
Posts: 90,450

10-12-2014, 07:51 AM	#17
TLO Life is changing.. Join Date: Jul 2012 Location: NW Missouri Casino cash: $1904900	Here's a nice list. http://www.effingpot.com/slang.shtml
Posts: 38,925

10-12-2014, 08:04 AM	#19
Direckshun __ Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Springpatch Casino cash: $4363447	The head of the Nobel Peace Prize committee is actually named Thorbjorn Jagland. That's his real name. That's honestly what we should be talking about, here.
Posts: 59,270

10-12-2014, 08:29 AM	#21
Kidd Lex Veteran Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: Kansas City Casino cash: $4852608	Me thinks the talley whackers seem nice __________________ You are not your job, you're not how much money you have in the bank. You are not the car you drive. You're not the contents of your wallet. You are not your ****ing khakis. -Fight Club
Posts: 4,159

10-12-2014, 08:32 AM	#23
Lonewolf Ed Veteran Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Olathe, KS Casino cash: $10606233	I find British slang and improper accents, such as the Brumie or general northern bastard to be hilarious! That annoying viagra commercial played over and over and over on TBS during the games, for example, would be a riot if some Cockney tart was pitching it instead of the woman that is doing it now. Oi! Ga' a problem wif the willie, eh? Cont get any starch inna ol' sails? Well, bollocks to that lot! 'Ere is this littul blue pill and it will make you a right terror between'a sheets again! Now Oi'm randy, so come on, throw a leg ovah, ya dirty wee bastard!
Posts: 3,774

10-12-2014, 08:43 AM	#26
bdj23 In my youth i pray to keep Join Date: Nov 2013 Location: Clown World Casino cash: $2709850	U wot m8?
Posts: 15,738

10-12-2014, 08:46 AM	#27
Wallcrawler How tall is this thing? Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Ground 0 for enema of US. Casino cash: $4232912	I have a British girl that works for me. She's pretty cool to have around just to listen to her talk. The one thing that always gets me is the "TH" being pronounced with an "F". Three becomes free, months becomes monfs, think becomes fink, etc.. Dilly-dally gets thrown around the place quite a bit, and "numpty prat" has become my new call-sign after repeated pranking. The best mixup in translation from British to American was the other day. She comes up to me in front of several customers and asks me if I have a spare rubber she can borrow. We all look at her funny, and it takes her an awkwardly long amount of time to get across that she was actually looking for an eraser. Apparently erasers are called rubbers in England, and condoms are called "Johnnies". Hilarious. __________________ She did not open her eyes this morning. I don't know what else to say.
Posts: 6,932

10-12-2014, 09:03 AM	#30
Valiant Valiant 'The Thread Killer' Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: Kansas City Casino cash: $6402380	Feck off ya pikie wanka.. It is their slang, just like here in the US for the different regions.
Posts: 18,354