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Old 05-03-2015, 07:51 AM  
Titty Meat Titty Meat is offline
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I was raped last night
Hey gang,

I want to start with this I'd not a brag thread and probably shouldn't be shared with the public but I'm going to do it anyway.

Last night was my 30th birthday party. Naturally I got wasted.

So I'm wasted as **** walking home im at the top of the hill half a block away from my house when I shit you not this car pulls over. It's a chick and I'm wasted so naturally I talk to her right?


We randomly start making out and she says some shit in Spanish/broken English. She gets out of the car takes my hand and pulls me over by a tree. There she ****ing grabs my dick unzips my pants and starts blowing me.

Me? I'm freaked out I just met this chick 5 seconds ago. I sthumble the **** home.

My question is an I gay marriage for walking away? And do I need to get checked for an std?
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Old 05-03-2015, 08:55 AM   #31
Cmd'r&Chief Cmd'r&Chief is offline
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Originally Posted by beach tribe View Post
I remember one time I ****ed a fat chick in a similar story. I know, right? Gross.
Eeewe. Fat.
True story. I was walking home because I got so drunk that I fell off of my horse and the ****er ran back to the house without me. I was ****ing Miles from home. We weren't following a road, either. We were just riding into the night. 12 pack in each saddle bag, dime bag in each pocket.
Woke up under a ****ing hog. I can still smell funyuns and blue bell.
Man, that was another life.
Man of the city, disguised HillBilly.
There's... No way this story is true. I'm sorry.
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Old 05-03-2015, 09:27 AM   #32
Demonpenz Demonpenz is offline
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Funyons and blue bell. Must have been from st Joe Southside.
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Old 05-03-2015, 09:29 AM   #33
Chiefaholic Chiefaholic is offline
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Old 05-03-2015, 09:34 AM   #34
DJJasonp DJJasonp is offline
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If this really happened - it's probably for some foreign reality tv show.

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Old 05-03-2015, 09:37 AM   #35
Pablo Pablo is offline
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In your drunken state do you think you would have been able to hose her tonsils anyhow? Or would she just have been working your gummy worm in some strangers yard for thirty minutes?
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Old 05-03-2015, 09:56 AM   #36
Titty Meat Titty Meat is offline
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Pablo i've never came from a bj
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Old 05-03-2015, 09:57 AM   #37
TLO TLO is offline
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Pablo i've never came from a bj
Prayers sent.
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Old 05-03-2015, 09:57 AM   #38
milkman milkman is offline
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Pablo i've never came from a bj
You must be doing it wrong.
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Old 05-03-2015, 10:00 AM   #39
J Diddy J Diddy is offline
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Did you check "her" for a dick?
This.

Or at least an Adam's Apple.
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Old 05-03-2015, 10:12 AM   #40
Hog's Gone Fishin Hog's Gone Fishin is offline
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Old 05-03-2015, 10:17 AM   #41
Titty Meat Titty Meat is offline
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These tags
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Old 05-03-2015, 10:34 AM   #42
Coochie liquor Coochie liquor is offline
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Strange... My somewhat feminine looking Latino lawn guy was raped last night. He said he was driving home when some drunk gringo wandered out into the road and almost into his truck. He go out to try and yell at the guy (he speaks in pretty broken English), who then pushed him up against a tree, then pulle out a "small flaccid penis, and started rubbing one out while trying to kiss him. Pablo was able to break free, jump back into his truck pulling a trailer full of lawn equpment, and speed away before anything worse could happen. He said the guy kept saying "Happy Birthday to me", and "oh me so horny".
Coincidence??
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Old 05-03-2015, 10:42 AM   #43
Bowser Bowser is online now
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Old 05-03-2015, 10:44 AM   #44
JohnnyHammersticks JohnnyHammersticks is offline
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Old 05-03-2015, 11:00 AM   #45
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