Who is the hottest dude on the team?

[ThaVirus]

For the purpose of this exercise, we’re only using current Chiefs players or those who may possibly or are likely to return (ex: MVS is out, Hardman is in). STDs are nonexistent and no baby trapping allowed! This is purely based off of who you think the hottest dude on the team is.

This is totally not gay, by the way, I promise. A conversation about the Elvis Grbac ‘Sexiest Athlete Alive’ cover in the Mahomes thread spawned this idea.

This is a safe space for you to get out all of your gayness. No one will ever judge you.

[RealSNR]

Originally Posted by Womble

I'm not a fan of the thread title and options because they are inherently a bit gay. I will therefore include all Chiefs cheerleaders in the "who would you most like to bang" question.

Given that I'm not gay, I'm going to take a hard pass on our ugly cheerleaders and go with Kelce.

You're British. You're already the gayest poster in this thread.

[ThaVirus]

Originally Posted by RunKC

I bet Noah Gray pulled a lot of pussy at Duke before he got tied down

You’re probably right but he did slip my mind. He’s got a bit of a beak on him but overall he’s more handsome than not, I’d say. It seems women are a bit more forgiving of men’s over exaggerated facial features than the other way around so I’m sure he did fine with the ladies.



When I was Googling him, Wikipedia shows that he’s only 24. Wtf? I feel like dude’s been here forever. I would have guessed he was at least 26.

[lewdog]

Originally Posted by ThaVirus

Excuse me, have you SEEN Mike Pennel?!?

In all seriousness, I think those three would get the most votes from the general population.

McDuffie’s pretty as hell and I think he’s got grey eyes or something, Kelce is obviously tall and probably the most classically handsome on the team, and Butker’s look and style is always well put together.

Though I did see a video of Pacheco on Facebook during the playoffs and was surprised by the number of middle aged Midwestern moms who were thirsting over him. He is a handsome dude and his skin is basically perfect, nary a blemish on his face. Smooth as a baby’s bottom.

My mom is 70 years old, white and thinks Pacheco is VERY cute.

I wouldn't have put him on the radar.

[ThaVirus]

Originally Posted by RealSNR

You're British. You're already the gayest poster in this thread.

****ing flamed him

[ThaVirus]

Originally Posted by BWillie

McDuffie or Kelce I would imagine.

Definitely isnt Mahomes

But its difficult to judge guys looks if ur not a polesmoker

*judges guys*

*says only gay dudes judge guys*

Lolllllllll

Originally Posted by lewdog

My mom is 70 years old, white and thinks Pacheco is VERY cute.

I wouldn't have put him on the radar.

Of all the social media posts I’ve seen about Mahomes, I’ve never seen that level of thirst. I’m sure he’s not upset but I’m assuming most women just don’t find Patty all that attractive.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by ThaVirus

I think this puts you at greater risk of cordyceps driving you around like a meat suit.

I’ll be keeping my eye on you.

I had to look that up, but it seems like maybe we should all cultivate a few cordyceps on our body.

https://www.healthline.com/nutrition...OC_TITLE_HDR_8

[Pablo]

Originally Posted by lewdog

Mine said the same.

Yep. There wasn't really any hesitation either.

Oh, and virus....

[JimNasium]

Other: I don’t find men attractive.

[ThaVirus]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

I had to look that up, but it seems like maybe we should all cultivate a few cordyceps on our body.

https://www.healthline.com/nutrition...OC_TITLE_HDR_8

You may have seen them on Discovery Channel. It’s the fungus that takes over ants and other insects in remote jungles like Borneo and stuff. They slowly feed on and replace the host’s cells, all the while commandeering the body and driving it around like a meat puppet. It’s really creepy.

That’s actually really interesting, though. I had no idea they had medicinal uses.

Apparently fungus can’t reproduce inside a host with an internal temperature higher than 94 degrees. So you’re safe… for now.

[GabyKeepsMeWarm]

You guessed it...

Frank Stallone.

Oh, and seriously Virus, just go to a bathhouse or something and get this shit out of your system, or use it to finally be the person you were meant to be.

[Why Not?]

Originally Posted by ThaVirus

Sounds like something a gay dude still in the closet would say to avoid rousing suspicion

****! Busted. I’ve been beating off to the list since it was posted.

[ThaVirus]

Originally Posted by Pablo

Yep. There wasn't really any hesitation either.

Oh, and virus....

Is my Matrix glitching or did you make a ‘two wolves’ joke at some other dude’s expense recently as well?

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by ThaVirus

You may have seen them on Discovery Channel. It’s the fungus that takes over ants and other insects in remote jungles like Borneo and stuff. They slowly feed on and replace the host’s cells, all the while commandeering the body and driving it around like a meat puppet. It’s really creepy.

That’s actually really interesting, though. I had no idea they had medicinal uses.

Apparently fungus can’t reproduce inside a host with an internal temperature higher than 94 degrees. So you’re safe… for now.

It sounds like I need to drink more hot chocolate.

[kysirsoze]

Originally Posted by JimNasium

Other: I don’t find men attractive.

Thanks for chiming in!!

*Cups hands around mouth*

CONFIRMED STRAIGHT GUY OVA HERE!

;-)

[The Franchise]

Don’t sleep on Justin Reid.