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View Poll Results: What's the best thing about Friday night?
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Driving around and reporting drivers that I think might be drunk.
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0 |
0% |
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It signifies the end of another week of huge success and accomplishment.
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3 |
6.98% |
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Frozen yogurt machine at the mall’s food court gets cleaned on Thursdays
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0 |
0% |
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More time to go to the park and throw Frisbees at dogs.
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2 |
4.65% |
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Two days coming up where I can post on chiefsplanet for 10+ hours.
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1 |
2.33% |
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The sun goes down later on Fridays, which keeps the extremity-eating night demons away.
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1 |
2.33% |
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Better selection of hookers down on the corner.
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1 |
2.33% |
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Better selection of johns when I’m hooking down on the corner.
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1 |
2.33% |
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I get to catch up on my Crazy Horse sculpture
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0 |
0% |
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I get to crossdress and go out to the bars to destroy the psyches of unobservant men.
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1 |
2.33% |
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Police patrols decrease.
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0 |
0% |
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Lots of extra time to pleasure myself.
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0 |
0% |
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All those people I watch through my binoculars seem to be having lots of fun.
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0 |
0% |
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My spouse performs a certain sexual act tonight if I take her out to dinner.
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1 |
2.33% |
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The kids next door are more likely to throw their ball in my yard, which means I get a free ball.
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1 |
2.33% |
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I can really explore the question, “Who IS Mike Catapano, really?”
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2 |
4.65% |
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If it’s the 13th I can go out and kill people as long as I’m wearing a hockey mask.
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0 |
0% |
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One week closer to parole.
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2 |
4.65% |
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I go out to the disco and I dance with total abandon, just like Travolta did in Grease, Saturday Night Fever, and Pulp Fiction..
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0 |
0% |
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The scorchingly hot ABC Friday night TV lineup.
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0 |
0% |
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Two straight days of In-A-Gadda-Da-Vidda
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0 |
0% |
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I can take time to really read and carefully consider all of the poll options.
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2 |
4.65% |
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I get to take the t-tops off, let my mullet flow, and drink Pabst out in the parking lot.
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0 |
0% |
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The magic wallaby appears on Fridays to take me to his mystical land.
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0 |
0% |
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It’s only three days until Monday, when I can start another work week!
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0 |
0% |
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Rape (SNR option)
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1 |
2.33% |
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More time to continue my search for Mr. Blond.
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1 |
2.33% |
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I have an excuse for humming that Rebecca Black song all day.
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0 |
0% |
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I get to take the clothespins off my nipples.
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1 |
2.33% |
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It’s payday, which means that I can keep the bookies from breaking one or more bones for another week.
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0 |
0% |
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When I get quietly and desperately drunk, I don’t have to get up early the next morning.
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2 |
4.65% |
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I get to make International Date Line jokes whenever people mention that it’s Friday.
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0 |
0% |
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Gorillas in the mist.
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0 |
0% |
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It’s Offal Night at the fish market.
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0 |
0% |
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Two days is just enough time to jet to Paris.
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0 |
0% |
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Gives me time to consider whether Fisher or Albert should play the left side.
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0 |
0% |
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More time to spend in my Lamborghini with my beautiful porn star girlfriend/wife
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1 |
2.33% |
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I can count one more week where I didn’t snap.
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6 |
13.95% |
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The Night Lights.
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0 |
0% |
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Key party down at the Denny’s.
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1 |
2.33% |
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The clothes spinning at the laundromat have a pleasurably hypnotic effect.
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0 |
0% |
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I can get into my video collection and watch reruns of the Chiefs’ 2012 season over and over and over.
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0 |
0% |
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For two days I’m a child again, wading in creeks and climbing trees and camping.
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1 |
2.33% |
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Everyone else goes home at 5 giving me more quiet time at the office.
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0 |
0% |
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Strippers seem to have more verve on the weekends.
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1 |
2.33% |
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It’s one day closer to the sweet release of death.
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3 |
6.98% |
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It’s Housecleaning and Heroin night.
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2 |
4.65% |
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Gives me more time to write that novel that I have in my head but not yet on paper.
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1 |
2.33% |
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I use an eight-day calendar, so Fridays are only special once every seven weeks.
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0 |
0% |
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There’s really nothing special about Fridays
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4 |
9.30% |
05-03-2013, 07:38 PM
VARSITY
What's the best thing about Friday night?
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