Women: Lean In and Poop at the Office, Already

[listopencil]

Originally Posted by theelusivedeucedrop

New mission: poop weighing

I got 1.3 pounds this morning. I just bought a new digital scale.

[Baby Lee]

Originally Posted by listopencil

I got 1.3 pounds this morning. I just bought a new digital scale.

And your first thought was to poop on it?

[listopencil]

Originally Posted by Baby Lee

And your first thought was to poop on it?

No. I'm a scientist. I made careful observations and recorded my results. Then I pooped on it.

[Dayze]

Originally Posted by listopencil

I got 1.3 pounds this morning. I just bought a new digital scale.

pffff. don't waste money on a scale.
I 'm pretty damn accurate in measuring weight in my hand when making hamburget patties.

I'm going that route, and spend the money on save on Natural Light.

[Iowanian]

This reminds me of a story my friend who was/is a custodian. When he told it, he was pretty traumatized from the previous night's events.

He was cleaning the ladies room toilets and was in a stall doing what he did when the door was thrown open and a burly lady attorney barreled into the room, kicked open the door and was blowing mud....violently....as she sat.

She acknowledged him being there during the act.


Also.....this article is false. Talk to any custodian or any bar tender and the'll tell you that women destroy the work shitter all of the time and are filthier pigs than men in the rest room.

[Amnorix]

Well, the story is true for some women at least, though. My wife for one. She absolutely does NOT use public restrooms to the extent possible, and for pooping -- forget it.

[Beef Supreme]

When I was about 13 years old I went on a hiking trip to Philmont Scout Ranch. After 10 days of hiking in the mountains we returned to the base camp. I walked into a stall to do my business and there was a turd sitting in the bowl that was as big as my forearm from elbow to wrist. I was an athletic 155 lbs at the time, not some scrawny kid. This thing would not flush, and I was actually compelled to go bring others in to take a look at it.

Not exactly on topic, but I just had to share.

[Iowanian]

I once wrote an ode to lady dumps

Originally Posted by Iowanian

She placed some calls to Guiness
To see what the feat was worth..
While she hadn't measured the cable yet
She assumed it had a record Girth.

A lady doesn't crap and tell
but sometimes she just must
She birthed a brown so big around,
she thought her pelvis would bust.

She has an horseman there to verify,
the cable when it lands
He tipped his hat and said
"by gawd, I think your brown is 19 hands".

Ripley sent the cameras
Guiness sent the measure tape,
Her landlord brought a shovel
For the skidmarks left to scrape.

She feels her face a flushing
as every one who takes a peek...
laughs at her new fortune
that with Ripleys now she seeks

So get a ticket to stand in line
To get yourself a look...
Or look for the record cable
In this years' Guiness book.

[ChiefaRoo]

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[Dayze]

There Once was a Woman from Nantucket,
and she shit like a horse.


I'm not very good at poems or limericks.

[Iowanian]

Let me try to help

There once was a woman from nantucket
and she shit like a horse
with no effort she filled up a bucket
stunk out the office without remorse

[ChiefGator]

Originally Posted by Iowanian

Let me try to help

There once was a woman from nantucket
and she shit like a horse
with no effort she filled up a bucket
stunk out the office without remorse

You are a modern day Longsworth...

[bevischief]

.

[bevischief]

..

[frankotank]

"Still, women are widely believed to experience greater pooping anxiety than men."

DUH! men don't give a shit! (pun intended)
if ya gotta poop...ya gotta poop.
my office has the mens and womens restrooms directly next to cubicles! I mean, like, there's a cubicle with an employee working in it about 8 feet from the door of each restroom. now me personally....if I'm in a stall and someones leaving, I'll wait until the door closes to engage in audible dookage. but some dudes...I swear they must wait for that door to open and PLLLLLLLLLL (is that how you spell a fart/poop noise?) I mean sometimes it's so damn bad. and you KNOW those people sitting right outside the door gotta be like.....DAAAAAYYYUMMM!