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Old 04-11-2016, 07:15 PM  
Strongside Strongside is offline
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I am moving to the suburbs. What do I need to know?
So my wife and I are urban yuppies and have lived in some sort of urban core / downtown for over 10 years now. We have just purchased a very nice home in Lenexa, KS and are leaving our loft in the River Market for a bigger yard (or just a yard, period), more square footage, and more rare police sirens and gunshots. We are anticipating children in the next few years, which is the main reason for our move.

What do I need to know? How do I make my grass look good? What do I need to do to my wardrobe so that I fit in with all of the other dads? What is the best lawnmower? What's the best brand of pool table? What do I do when I've had too much to drink and can't drive home? What time do I need to stop being loud on my deck and go to bed? Where can I get a legit beard trim and haircut by a real barber? Where is the best place to get a latte? How do I handle my road rage during a long commute?

Thanks in advance, old white dudes.
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Old 04-12-2016, 05:39 PM   #136
mdstu mdstu is online now
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In the city of Kansas City, since you pay earnings tax (1% of your income to KCMO) the only real perk you get for that is free city trash pickup.
The Cincinnati suburbs are the same way, they get me for 1.5%.
On top of the trash service, they have free yard waste removal (Leaves/Tree branches).
They also will deliver all the free mulch you want, you just call or email and they will come and dump it in your driveway.

Another interesting perk, you can reserve the city dump trucks for renovation/junk waste removal. They will park it in your driveway on Friday evening, you fill it up over the weekend and they pick it up Monday morning and dump it for you in the landfill.
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Old 04-12-2016, 05:43 PM   #137
Ming the Merciless Ming the Merciless is offline
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aerator / dethatch/ weed n feed (sounds like you can afford landscaper tho)

go with a sears craftsman lawnmower

dunno about pool tables but im assuming used is the way to go

uber fo shiz

10pm dial it back to a low roar and turn down the tunes a lil

i dunno im still looking for a damn barber

mcdonalds 1 dollar coffee drive thru

get a huge bazooka tube and blast some old school mega bass rap
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Old 04-12-2016, 05:58 PM   #138
Bugeater Bugeater is offline
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aerator / dethatch/ weed n feed (sounds like you can afford landscaper tho)

go with a sears craftsman lawnmower

dunno about pool tables but im assuming used is the way to go

uber fo shiz

10pm dial it back to a low roar and turn down the tunes a lil

i dunno im still looking for a damn barber

mcdonalds 1 dollar coffee drive thru

get a huge bazooka tube and blast some old school mega bass rap
Oh god...no...no...NO. It's bad enough we have people recommending Toros in this thread.
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Old 04-12-2016, 06:13 PM   #139
Pablo Pablo is offline
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Your lawn is now your child.
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Old 04-12-2016, 06:13 PM   #140
Meatloaf Meatloaf is offline
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Oh god...no...no...NO. It's bad enough we have people recommending Toros in this thread.
FWIW, Consumer Reports recommends 4 or 5 models of Honda mowers as their top mowers. I think there's a Toro model thats also recommended, but it appears that Honda is the way to go.

BTW, I would highly recommend Art's Billiard Supply (it's over near Independence Center) if you're looking for a pool table. It's a family run business in pretty good sized store. Lots to choose from. Very nice folks too.
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Old 04-12-2016, 06:13 PM   #141
Pablo Pablo is offline
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I went suburban last year. Got myself a man cave. Now we're having a baby and my wife can't wait to put kid shit down there.
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Old 04-12-2016, 06:14 PM   #142
lewdog lewdog is offline
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I went suburban last year. Got myself a man cave. Now we're having a baby and my wife can't wait to put kid shit down there.
Does she already have two black eyes?

If not............
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Old 04-12-2016, 06:18 PM   #143
Pablo Pablo is offline
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Does she already have two black eyes?

If not............
She's pregnant now. I figure I'll wait until the baby is out before I give her the St. Joe eyeshadow.
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Old 04-12-2016, 06:21 PM   #144
eDave eDave is offline
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She's pregnant now. I figure I'll wait until the baby is out before I give her the St. Joe eyeshadow.
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Old 04-12-2016, 07:48 PM   #145
Buzz Buzz is offline
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Old 04-12-2016, 07:55 PM   #146
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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I've got a man cave.....complete with walk in gun vault and animal mounts on the walls........and I never go there because it looks like a bus full of barbi dolls crashed into a bunch of #superherolivesmatter interstate blockade down there now....and I doubt anything other than some Disney channel has been on my tv since December.


I'm never giving up my man room.
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Old 04-12-2016, 08:06 PM   #147
Easy 6 Easy 6 is offline
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You're having kids.

That's a kids cave. Complete with crayon and spilled food covering your nice couches and chairs.

Enjoy.
lets just call it what it is / will inevitably become... and thats as it should be

Go get' em, Strongside
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Old 04-12-2016, 08:14 PM   #148
SAUTO SAUTO is offline
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Enjoy the shit ass commute into downtown if you have to deal with rush hour travel. The city's worst drivers can be found from 7-9am and again at 4-6:30 pm on I-35 between Lamar and 119th street every day of the work week. Avoid 435 if at all possible during those times as well.
ill attest to this.


I made this drive today in fact.


Bunch of dumb ****s
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Old 04-12-2016, 08:21 PM   #149
SAUTO SAUTO is offline
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Small town Louisiana, bud. We pay two separate companies for water and power. I guess it's possible that it's part of our power bill.
Small town here too. Mine is through the water bill
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Old 04-12-2016, 08:22 PM   #150
stevieray stevieray is offline
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ill attest to this.


I made this drive today in fact.


Bunch of dumb ****s
It's horrible.
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