Cockamamie Hog Shit that Pisses You Off

['Hamas' Jenkins]

I had to buy a new battery, which normally isn't such a big deal. However, when I went to pop it out at the store (to avoid the core charge) the nut on the negative terminal was rounded off and I didn't have the tools to cut it off.

I get home and let it go for a few days, because I didn't feel like ****ing with it.

Just went outside and managed to get the 10mm rounded nut off with an 11/32 socket (didn't have to use the Dremel to cut it off, fortunately), but the metal strips that secure the battery down from the top are inveterate ****ing ****s, particularly the back strip, which is secured by a foot long rod with a hooked tip.

Trying to fit that mother****er into the back slot made me feel like one of those Apple slaves that launch themselves from the top of the factory into a better life. Of course, every time you try to tighten the front screw it moves the back post and nothing short of a ****ing voodoo spell was going to get that mother****er in.

That's the part that pisses me off about car repair. The job itself is never particularly difficult, but there is always one asshole mother****er of a fastener, nut, or screw the ends up taking 20 times longer than the ****ing job itself.

Am I the only one so enraged by such stupid shit?

[notorious]

Originally Posted by Prison Bitch

Someone who texts you, you call them right up, they won't answer.

Yep.

[SAUTO]

Originally Posted by Buehler445

I was looking through some old pictures on my phone and remembered this thread. Everybody REP THIS MAN. Holy ****ing hell. I can get that oil filter off in about :45 now (after I find all the damn tools).

Anyway, here is the proof.

The requisite tool.



You can see a Standard 1-1/4" socket would be too blasted tall. Moreover, you can't get a goddamn extension in there because of the stupid motor mount frame. So you have to have a u-joint mother****er to get it around the corner




Who would have thought that you would need not 1 but 2 special goddamned tools to change the stupid oil.



And lookie here. Stupid Deere that I hate so much has a similar filter on their tractors and they can seem to engineer it to get a ****ing tool on there. Excellent work GM, you are stupider than Deere. Excellent work.



Anyway, send JASONSAUTO Some goddamned rep ASAP. Many thanks bud.

Lol, glad to be of service man.

Funny thing is I see this thread and even look at the date and thought it was a couple days ago, so I read you post again and typed out almost word for word the exact same response again and it hit me that I had told you about it before,

[Earthling]

I had a 10 min. job once of putting a rubber washer in my shower to stop a small leak. Once the handles were removed I noticed it had been dripping down the drywall behind the wall tiles. I ended up ripping the tiled walls out and at that point noticed that the floor had been getting the drip-down as well. I had to take out the tub and toilet and had to replace the sub-flooring plywood. My 10 min. job took me three or four days overall.

[-King-]

Originally Posted by O.city

Adults that freak out about the dentist/being at the dentist.

I realize you had a bad experience as a kid, we all had shitty things happen as children. Youre now 40, grow up and let's get this shit done.

And yes, because you were scared of the dentist and didn't go for 25 years, you're now going to get to spend alot of time and $ with one. That's not the dentist fault, it's not my fault you can't perform basic oral hygiene

Are bad experiences at the dentists normal? I've gone every 6 months since I was a child and I have no bad experiences. I always wondered why people on tv shows would hate going to the dentist so much.

[rockymtnchief]

Originally Posted by -King-

Are bad experiences at the dentists normal? I've gone every 6 months since I was a child and I have no bad experiences. I always wondered why people on tv shows would hate going to the dentist so much.

Ditto. I even dated a couple of the gals that cleaned my teeth.

I didn't get my wisdom teeth pulled until I was 32. I went in, had them pulled, and went back to work. I had a little discomfort, but nothing too bad.

[O.city]

Originally Posted by -King-

Are bad experiences at the dentists normal? I've gone every 6 months since I was a child and I have no bad experiences. I always wondered why people on tv shows would hate going to the dentist so much.

Apparently. I never had a bad experience and I had alot of work done as a kid/teenager.

But in the old days, apparently anesthetics weren't often used and people freek out about needles and shit

[Lzen]

Originally Posted by Buehler445

This is why I'm a shit mechanic. Dad is a ****ing wizard at making shit like that work.

I can make spreadsheets do amazing things, but can be brought to my knees by a ****ing fastener.

Wife's car isn't better. She has an 11 Buick Regal. I change the oil in it because I like to check things over while I'm in there (and I'm cheap). So it has an internal oil filter, which is cool. So it's got a cap on it that takes 1-1/4. No problem. I've got a socket. Mother****er it's under a bunch of shit. No problem I've got a wrench. But you can't get to it straight, and you have to run the wrench through these ****ing wiring conduits (always a good ****ing idea). So that's the best option, and you have to fight to get maybe 1/25th of a turn at a time. It takes me 8 - 10 min just to get the ****ing oil filter out. Then I have to get the bitch back on. Mother**** GM.

I'm pretty sure GM engineers smoke a lot of weed.

[Lzen]

Originally Posted by Marcellus

Pretty much everything that has to do with plumbing.

Need a new faucet? Get ready for 43 trips to the hardware store because nothing you had works with the new faucet even if they look identical.

Changing out a dishwasher? May as well buy a new house.

So true!

[Lzen]

Had to change the lug bolt on my son's 97 Cavalier the other day. Let's just say that a job that should take maybe 20-30 minutes ended up taking me probably an hour and a half. Several cuss sessions and bleeding fingers later it was done.

[Lzen]

Originally Posted by Buehler445

Were you around when we did that? I can't remember. That's the brand new combine dad caught on fire.

Uhhhh....brand new combine caught on fire? More details, please?

[Buehler445]

Originally Posted by Lzen

Uhhhh....brand new combine caught on fire? More details, please?

So my uncle has a field right next to the dealership. Dealership wants to show off latest and greatest combine, uncle doesn't want to pay to have it cut. Easy solution. Let the Deere mother****ers cut it with their machine.

There was a test plot there that we had to keep track of so dad is the first one to "demonstrate" it. I was off doing something else so I missed all the fun, but while dad and the seed guy were running it, my uncle drives by and tells him that the son of a bitch is smoking and he probably ought to quit (). So he drives it back to the dealer and tells them their fancy combine is on fire ().

I don't remember what it was, some wiring shit or something minor, but it was glorious because:

1. Not my problem.
2. Their fancy new rig can't cut 30 acres without starting itself on fire ().
3. They want $400,000.00 to burn your shit down 30 acres in.
4. It bears repeating - Not my problem.

[Buehler445]

Originally Posted by O.city

Apparently. I never had a bad experience and I had alot of work done as a kid/teenager.

But in the old days, apparently anesthetics weren't often used and people freek out about needles and shit

Dentist I had when I was a kid was rough as shit. I think he thought just because what he was doing was better than the treatment he got in the Marines in the 60s meant that it was OK.

Then I went to college and got a full time job with dental. Saw a different dentist. It wasn't awful! How is that even possible? You really don't have to bleed all over and feel like you got in a bar fight after a cleaning? Who knew? Not me, I'd always went to the mother****er. I wanted to give the man a hug and go beat the bejesus out of the guy I had as a kid.

[O.city]

Originally Posted by Buehler445

Dentist I had when I was a kid was rough as shit. I think he thought just because what he was doing was better than the treatment he got in the Marines in the 60s meant that it was OK.

Then I went to college and got a full time job with dental. Saw a different dentist. It wasn't awful! How is that even possible? You really don't have to bleed all over and feel like you got in a bar fight after a cleaning? Who knew? Not me, I'd always went to the mother****er. I wanted to give the man a hug and go beat the bejesus out of the guy I had as a kid.

Yeah, some guys are /were rough.

Sometimes with kids, you gotta do what you gotta do. Strapping them down to a papoose board is no fun (seriously, Google that shit), but when they've got multiple draining abscesses at 5, it's warranted

[Lzen]

Originally Posted by Reerun_KC

People that wont call you back...

I do that when it comes to my sister. I know when she calls she just wants something. And she's the type of person that doesn't appreciate your help like most normal people. So she calls and I let it go to voice mail. I ignore it for a few days, eventually calling her and finding out what was the purpose of her call. As an added benefit, by a few days later she usually has gotten someone else to help her.

[Lzen]

Originally Posted by Prison Bitch

Someone who texts you, you call them right up, they won't answer.

I sometimes text people because I'm about to be occupied and I figure they can text me back in their time and I will reply in my time. If I had time to talk in person I would have called. Duh.