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View Poll Results: Based on the available data, has my wife been replaced by an alien? | |||
Yes, she has definitely been replaced. You have incontrovertible evidence. | 20 | 46.51% | |
Maybe. Try applying some sort of high voltage to her as a test. | 12 | 27.91% | |
No, she has not been replaced. Aliens wouldn't miss this type of clue. | 6 | 13.95% | |
You need to track the data over a longer period of time before posting a thread like this. | 5 | 11.63% | |
Voters: 43. You may not vote on this poll |
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07-03-2019, 04:49 PM | Topic Starter |
NFL's #1 Ermines Fan
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: My house
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VARSITY
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I'm a little worried that my wife has been replaced by an alien.
I've been married for 20+ years, and when my wife sneezes, she always sneezes three times. Always. Every single time. Whenever I would be talking and she'd start to sneeze, I would just wait until the third sneeze because she always sneezed in three-sneeze patterns.
That has been the case for over two decades. However, about a month ago, she sneezed, and the third sneeze never came. She only sneezed twice. I was stunned. In the past month, it's happened a couple more times. She is now sneezing in a two-sneeze pattern. All other behaviors are consistent with past patterns. If aliens were to replace a person, this is exactly the type of small missed detail that would give away the ruse. It's a behavior that occurs at random intervals, and infrequently enough that they likely wouldn't have the observational data to build it into their android. If anything, they would default to a commonly observed human behavior, which is a two-sneeze pattern. Should I be concerned? |
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07-03-2019, 04:51 PM | #2 |
Bono & Grbac wasn't enough
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Sioux City, IA
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I think she's just getting better at sneezing
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07-03-2019, 04:54 PM | #3 |
MVP
Join Date: Jun 2004
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It's a result of watching Mahomes. She used to check down into three little sneezes like Alex, but now she takes two bigger ones and the third one isn't needed.
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2 0 |
07-03-2019, 04:52 PM | #4 |
Needs more middle fingers
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: San Diego
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Early signs of menopause.
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07-03-2019, 05:05 PM | #5 |
Sprinkle in some Mahomes
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Butte Montana
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Aliens never sneeze, They have a high pitched screech in a morse code pattern.
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07-03-2019, 05:05 PM | #6 |
Supporter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Scott City KS
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Best to embrace your alien overlord.
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07-03-2019, 05:09 PM | #7 |
Banned
Join Date: Jan 2013
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My ex always sneezed 3 times. Always.
Turned out she was just a ****. |
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5 0 |
07-03-2019, 05:31 PM | #8 | |
On one quarter
Join Date: Jul 2005
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Casino cash: $2917111
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Quote:
...sneezing in multiples, not being a ****
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07-03-2019, 05:45 PM | #9 |
Replaced by a future HOFer !!
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: donkey land
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Apparently you believe in aliens?
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Posts: 27,021
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07-04-2019, 03:43 AM | #10 |
Supporter
Join Date: Aug 2000
Casino cash: $6838598
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If your romantic liaisons involve **** sneezes, you might want to hasten to the free clinic.
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07-03-2019, 05:11 PM | #11 |
Starter
Join Date: Dec 2009
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It's finally time to breakout the alien anal probe bitchez!
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07-03-2019, 05:14 PM | #12 |
MVP
Join Date: Aug 2011
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I also dated a three sneezer.
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Posts: 12,642
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07-03-2019, 05:22 PM | #13 |
I'll be back.
Join Date: Nov 2002
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07-03-2019, 05:46 PM | #14 |
Supporter
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Who knows?
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07-03-2019, 05:53 PM | #15 |
On one quarter
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: I play all day
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A person who has been [ideologically] demoralized cannot assess true information. the [demoralization] process is complete and irreversible. -Yuri Bezmenov on Soviet Subversion |
Posts: 6,137
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