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View Poll Results: What attributes will my new neighbor(s) have? Check all that apply.
Will be “distant friendly”, waving but seldom chatting 18 36.00%
Will be a Chiefs fan 3 6.00%
Will be a cult 7 14.00%
Will be a member of Chiefsplanet 1 2.00%
Will be a recluse, never leaving the house 5 10.00%
Will be a stoner 17 34.00%
Will be a vegan 10 20.00%
Will be an avid Broncos fan 24 48.00%
Will be retired 3 6.00%
Will be swingers who propose wife swapping 7 14.00%
Will be the Barney and Betty to my Fried and Wilma and we'll do everything together 2 4.00%
Will be very interested in unexplained phenomena like Bigfoot and UFOs 6 12.00%
Will be Von Miller 6 12.00%
Will be more than 15 years younger than me 14 28.00%
Will come into my house unannounced and take food out of my refrigerator 6 12.00%
Will contain a registered sex offender (not a teacher who scored with a student) 9 18.00%
Will contain a registered sex offender who is a teacher who scored with her student. 7 14.00%
Will contain an adult child who never launched 10 20.00%
Will eventually hop a freighter to Venezuela with me 3 6.00%
Will give out amazing candy at Halloween, like 16 ounce Hershey bars 4 8.00%
Will grow large quantities of marijuana in the house 9 18.00%
Will hang out on my porch with me, drinking Pibb Xtra and commenting on pedestrians 3 6.00%
Will have a constantly barking dog 13 26.00%
Will have a Duggar-like family composition 3 6.00%
Will have a scorchingly hot college-age daughter 5 10.00%
Will have a telescope pointed toward my window 8 16.00%
Will have a weird tech job that I can't even make conversation about, so I can only nod when they tell me 5 10.00%
Will have awesome Christmas lights 3 6.00%
Will have weird and dull hobbies that don’t interest me at all. 10 20.00%
Will include an attractive mature woman who does naked yoga 5 10.00%
Will include at least one nude sunbather woman 3 6.00%
Will invite us onto their yacht for epic adventures 1 2.00%
Will let me play with their cat. 4 8.00%
Will like my wife, but not me. 11 22.00%
Will maintain a world-class yard 2 4.00%
Will move out again within two years 8 16.00%
Will mow their lawn in Bermuda shorts and sandals with socks 6 12.00%
Will never acknowledge my existence 7 14.00%
Will not speak English 6 12.00%
Will own a loud motorcycle that they rev early in the morning 6 12.00%
Will paint their house in zebra stripes or camo 3 6.00%
Will put out planters that are made from old tires or barrels 7 14.00%
Will regularly bring me delicious homemade pies 2 4.00%
Will rent out an AirBnB room 6 12.00%
Will restore my faith in humanity with their kindness 1 2.00%
Will shovel my walk of snow just to be nice 1 2.00%
Will sit on a couch on their porch, wearing a wife beater shirt and glaring at me 11 22.00%
Will take issue with our fence placement 11 22.00%
I think the house will sit vacant and never be occupied. 2 4.00%
I think your neighbors are imaginary and you really live next door to an empty lot. 4 8.00%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 50. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 05-25-2018, 12:32 PM   Topic Starter
Rain Man Rain Man is offline
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My neighbor is moving.
I've lived in my house for 23 years, and I've always had the same two next door neighbors. Now one of them is going to move and I'm going to have to break in a new neighbor. I don't like the pace of change that I'm seeing.

I don't know what to expect. What will my new neighbor be like?

Poll coming in a moving van that will park in front of my house.
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Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-25-2018, 12:36 PM   #2
Halfcan Halfcan is offline
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I think they made an Academy Award Winning movie about your situation?
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Halfcan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Halfcan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Halfcan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Halfcan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Halfcan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Halfcan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Halfcan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Halfcan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Halfcan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Halfcan is obviously part of the inner Circle.Halfcan is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-25-2018, 12:39 PM   #3
Graystoke Graystoke is offline
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The best way to break in new neighbors is show them who is in charge.
I suggest the day they move in, show up with homemade cookies. Right when they reach for the cookies hit them on the head and say "Bad Neighbor!"
Tip: Rolled up newspaper is a good object to use as the hitting device.
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Old 05-25-2018, 12:45 PM   #4
Rain Man Rain Man is offline
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I like the rolled up newspaper idea. I need to make sure that they know I'm in control of the block.
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Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-25-2018, 12:47 PM   #5
loochy loochy is offline
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1. buy the old house

2. demolish old house

3. enjoy the extra space from the now empty lot

4. profit

5. buy an apricot bmw
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loochy is obviously part of the inner Circle.loochy is obviously part of the inner Circle.loochy is obviously part of the inner Circle.loochy is obviously part of the inner Circle.loochy is obviously part of the inner Circle.loochy is obviously part of the inner Circle.loochy is obviously part of the inner Circle.loochy is obviously part of the inner Circle.loochy is obviously part of the inner Circle.loochy is obviously part of the inner Circle.loochy is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-25-2018, 12:53 PM   #6
Rain Man Rain Man is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by loochy View Post
1. buy the old house

2. demolish old house

3. enjoy the extra space from the now empty lot

4. profit

5. buy an apricot bmw
I've considered buy the house and then doing a big human-sized hamster tunnel to connect our houses. That would be fun. But I don't need the room.
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I'm putting random letters here as a celebration of free speech: xigrakgrah misorojeq rkemeseit.
Posts: 141,710
Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-25-2018, 12:48 PM   #7
Buehler445 Buehler445 is offline
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Eh. Just be hanging out in your garage with the door open when they roll up in the van. Sets the right tone.

/Takes cover for the Dongerplosion.
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Buehler445 is obviously part of the inner Circle.Buehler445 is obviously part of the inner Circle.Buehler445 is obviously part of the inner Circle.Buehler445 is obviously part of the inner Circle.Buehler445 is obviously part of the inner Circle.Buehler445 is obviously part of the inner Circle.Buehler445 is obviously part of the inner Circle.Buehler445 is obviously part of the inner Circle.Buehler445 is obviously part of the inner Circle.Buehler445 is obviously part of the inner Circle.Buehler445 is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-25-2018, 12:50 PM   #8
BlackHelicopters BlackHelicopters is offline
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Drone on constantly about your Apricot BMW to put the fear in them. Also loathing.
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BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-25-2018, 12:55 PM   #9
MarkDavis'Haircut MarkDavis'Haircut is offline
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Very enjoyable poll.

Kudos to you for my laugh of the day.
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Old 05-25-2018, 01:07 PM   #10
Rain Man Rain Man is offline
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Originally Posted by Carr4MVP View Post
Very enjoyable poll.

Kudos to you for my laugh of the day.
I'm glad you're enjoying the poll, but I'm not. Early returns indicate that my new neighbor will be a stoner Broncos fan with a yippy dog.
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I'm putting random letters here as a celebration of free speech: xigrakgrah misorojeq rkemeseit.
Posts: 141,710
Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-25-2018, 05:12 PM   #11
MarkDavis'Haircut MarkDavis'Haircut is offline
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Originally Posted by Rain Man View Post
I'm glad you're enjoying the poll, but I'm not. Early returns indicate that my new neighbor will be a stoner Broncos fan with a yippy dog.
I voted Broncos fan because that would be the nightmare scenario. You guys and Chargers fans are fun folk. Most Broncos fans, with the few exceptions here, are arrogant.
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Old 05-25-2018, 12:57 PM   #12
WhawhaWhat WhawhaWhat is offline
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If it does turn out to be a registered sex offender who is a teacher who scored with her student, please post pics so we can judge her guilt.
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WhawhaWhat has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.WhawhaWhat has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.WhawhaWhat has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.WhawhaWhat has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.WhawhaWhat has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.WhawhaWhat has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.WhawhaWhat has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.WhawhaWhat has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.WhawhaWhat has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.WhawhaWhat has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.WhawhaWhat has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.
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Old 05-25-2018, 01:08 PM   #13
Rain Man Rain Man is offline
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Originally Posted by WhawhaWhat View Post
If it does turn out to be a registered sex offender who is a teacher who scored with her student, please post pics so we can judge her guilt.
Oh, absolutely. And I'll let everyone know if she's teaching adult ed classes now at the local community college.
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Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-25-2018, 01:10 PM   #14
BlackHelicopters BlackHelicopters is offline
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Please post pics of scorchingly hot college girl.
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BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.BlackHelicopters is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-25-2018, 01:12 PM   #15
Rain Man Rain Man is offline
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Originally Posted by BlackHelicopters View Post
Please post pics of scorchingly hot college girl.
I'm rooting for twins, but I don't want to get my hopes too high.
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I'm putting random letters here as a celebration of free speech: xigrakgrah misorojeq rkemeseit.
Posts: 141,710
Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.Rain Man is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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