Hypothetical: Ridding the world of evil people.

[Rain Man]

In light of your amazing contributions to a football bulletin board, you have been deemed a person with a very high understanding of humanity. (This is hypothetical if that's not already obvious.)

As a result, some higher power has approached you for help. You may assume that this higher power is someone you respect and will not turn down, whether it's God, the Illuminati, Batman, The Global Commission To Make The World A Better Place, aliens, the Teamsters, dolphins, or some other group. It doesn't matter to me.

You are given the following assignment:

1. Develop up to 10 yes/no questions that everyone in the world must answer truthfully.
2. Define a "cutoff score" where people scoring below (or above) a certain level will be categorized as non-contributing members of the world. They will suddenly cease to exist.

The rules:

A. For your ethical purposes, you may assume that some time travel or divine intervention ensures they were never born, or if you prefer ... public executions. But let's go with the most humane route that doesn't make you a mass murderer.

B. Questions may be worded any way you wish. They can be negative ("Have you ever stolen something from someone else's house?"), they can be positive ("Have you ever helped a stranger in a broken-down car?), they can be value-laden ("Do you believe in the Hindu god Vishnu?), they can be attitudinal ("Do you approve of pedophilia"?), they can be attributes ("Are you under 5 feet tall?"), they can be oddly specific ("Are you a Denver Bronco?"), they can be whatever you want as long as they're yes/no questions.

C. You can have anywhere from 1 to 10 questions. Your call.

D. People get 1 point for every yes, and 0 points for every no. You can define a minimum passing score or a maximum passing score depending on how you word your questions. For example, you can define 10 questions about positive traits and anyone getting less than 9 points is gone, or you can define 4 questions about negative traits and anyone getting more than 2 points is gone. You get to design it.

E. Recognize that once you set the scoring, the people who fail your test will cease to exist. No exceptions to the rule. If your mom fails, she's gone right along with those Taliban leaders. And if you arrange questions to save your sister the crack whore, maybe her pimp will get saved, too. This is a standardized test.

F. Recognize that you have to take the test, too.

With those rules, what are your questions, what scores will let people survive, and what percent of the population do you think will cease to exist?

[RobBlake]

You listen to Prog Rock don't you.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by RobBlake

You listen to Prog Rock don't you.

Is that one of your questions?

[Rain Man]

I'm going to start the brainstorming with a few negative questions.

1. Are you willing to personally kill someone if they disagree with your religious beliefs?
2. If you were taking money as payment from someone who has never harmed you, and they accidentally overpaid you, would you keep the money?
3. Do you enjoy hurting animals?

[EPodolak]

I prefer the fun threads where you do most of the work.

[EPodolak]

Good thread idea, I'll wrangle some energy for it later.

[RobBlake]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

Is that one of your questions?

one of my questions will be music related.. unqiue thread idea.. gotta come up with some interesting ones

[patteeu]

Originally Posted by EPodolak

I prefer the fun threads where you do most of the work.

[KC_Lee]

1. Are you willing to personally kill someone if they disagree with your religious beliefs?
- Nope, I am an atheist. Someone's religious beliefs have zero impact on my life. As long as said beliefs do not include the harming of others or animals I really don't care what you believe in.

2. If you were taking money as payment from someone who has never harmed you, and they accidentally overpaid you, would you keep the money?
- Yep, learn to count. The onus is on the payer not the payee.

3. Do you enjoy hurting animals?
- Nope, and people that do are sick and depraved. Do I think hunters are hurting animals? Nope, 99% of the hunters that I know want to make a clean and painless kill on their quarry.

[LoneWolf]

1. Do you believe all atheists are bad people? No
2. Have you ever given money/food to someone in need when nobody was watching? Yes
3. Have you ever intentionally harmed an animal outside of a hunting situation? No
4. If you found a wallet/purse that contained $500, would you attempt to find the owner and return all of their money? Yes
5. Have you ever inappropriately touched a child? No
6. If you saw someone stealing from someone you didn't know, would you attempt to stop them or call the police? Yes
7. If it was legal, would you kill someone because their religious beliefs were different than yours? No
8. Have you ever been moved to tears by a song, movie, or play? No
9. Have you ever farted inside a pen elevator full of people just before exiting? No
10. Are you a fan of the Denver Broncos or Oakland Raiders? No

The bolder answers earn 1 point. If someone scores below a 7, they are to be sent to Brazil where they have to complete what I call the Devil's triathlon. They have to swim two miles in a river, bike 30 miles through the Brazilian ghettos with $1,000 dollars taped to their body, and run 15 miles through the rainforest covered in human blood. If they survive the triathlon, they are forgiven for being an evil person and allowed to return to society.

[Hog's Gone Fishin]

#4) Would you be willing to jerk a swine snake while eating a bacon sammich ?

Cut off score , if yes then you may continue on . If no then you must take your ass back to the Middle East.

[bevischief]

Nuke it from orbit, the only way to be sure.

[Otter]

Do you love dogs?

While it's not up there with will you murder for religion I sincerely believe it has intrinsic value to gauge someones karma. And Rain Man, if you ever decide to eat mushrooms I'm only at the other end of the state. I don't want to be the focus point. Just a fly on the wall to see what comes out of that dome when turbo boost kicks in.

[bsp4444]

Originally Posted by LoneWolf

1. Do you believe all atheists are bad people? No
2. Have you ever given money/food to someone in need when nobody was watching? Yes
3. Have you ever intentionally harmed an animal outside of a hunting situation? No
4. If you found a wallet/purse that contained $500, would you attempt to find the owner and return all of their money? Yes
5. Have you ever inappropriately touched a child? No
6. If you saw someone stealing from someone you didn't know, would you attempt to stop them or call the police? Yes
7. If it was legal, would you kill someone because their religious beliefs were different than yours? No
8. Have you ever been moved to tears by a song, movie, or play? No
9. Have you ever farted inside a pen elevator full of people just before exiting? No
10. Are you a fan of the Denver Broncos or Oakland Raiders? No

The bolder answers earn 1 point. If someone scores below a 7, they are to be sent to Brazil where they have to complete what I call the Devil's triathlon. They have to swim two miles in a river, bike 30 miles through the Brazilian ghettos with $1,000 dollars taped to their body, and run 15 miles through the rainforest covered in human blood. If they survive the triathlon, they are forgiven for being an evil person and allowed to return to society.

This line of questioning won't work because if you switch the answers to #5 and #2 you still get the same score.

[stumppy]

Where are the little check boxes I can click on ?