Where does an Irish man take his family on vacation?
To another bar....

What does an Irish man consider for a seven course meal?
A six pack and a potato...

Did you hear about the two gay Irishmen? Gerald Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzgerald.

And for the kids out there.. a clean one..

Why is Ireland the richest country in the world?

Because its capital is always Dublin.

Is that Chase Daniel on a box of Lucky Charms.

From "Foreigners Around the World" by P.J. O'Rourke during his 1970s National Lampoon days:

IRISH

Racial Characteristics:
Pie-faced, neckless, bandy-legged sots who almost never ****. Ignorant and superstitious, they are in utter thrall to the vile, conniving priests of their dark and barbarous religion. Their women have their legs on upside down and no man in the country eats anything but potatoes, and only eats them when is out of strong drink. The principal delights of the Irish are in quarreling and fighting and killing each other with bombs. They can be trained to do nothing useful that a dray horse can't accomplish in half the time, and they spew out a continuous stream of mumbles and grunts which they fancy to be "poems." They sell their children for whiskey.

Good Points:
Many Irish are dead.

Proper Forms of Address:
Bogmouth, peat-face, Mr. Potato Head, nun-buns, dumb Mick.

An Anecdote Illustrating Something of the Irish Character:
There once was an Irishman who got so drunk while he was in Rome that he kissed his wife and beat the Pope's foot to a pulp with a coal shovel.

irishjokes.com

DAMN YOU KEG!!!!! (Wee bit anyway)

well hells bells, I'm way late....but I was looking for the clean jokes thread and stumbled across this. I can't BELIEVE this one isn't in here...

An English man, a Scottish man and an Irish man all order a Guiness.
there is a fly in each one.
the English man pushes the beer away and orders another.
the Scottish man plucks the fly out of his beer and takes a drink.
the Irish man grabs the fly, starts pounding on it's back yelling.....
spit it out ya sonofabitch, SPIT IT OUT!

Irish buddy showed us a drinking game a few years back.

Pick a card out of a deck. Whatever you pull, drink that many beers. Repeat.

Too soon.

I told this one at the family dinner table for Easter. My Dad was the only one who laughed, (he's from England), the rest thought it was vile or didn't get it.

My Dad = LMAO

FYP.







OK your joke was amusing. :)

Here's a good Irish joke:

Manti T'eo