[Gonzo]

Well, BT... Reading through your posts here and my case is a bit different.

I was going to be goddamned if someone else raised my son. If you can get past the heartbreak part and think logically, you have got to do what's best for your kiddo.

Taking an autistic kid out of their routine and comfortable environment is detrimental to their well being.
I get the feeling that you've placed the pussy on a pedestal just a bit. Once you get past it, let me know if you need pointers.

The very first thing you should start doing here is documenting everything. If she's cold enough to tear your family apart, she cares little for your feelings and likely wants that child support or alimony (if applicable).
Get a ****ing lawyer, ASAP.

My case was special. She and I were together 20 years, I got majority custody but made sure he was with his mom 50% of the time. We eased him into it though.

Anyway, she and I reconciled and have been together for nearly a year now.
Just be careful man. Think with your head and not your heart.