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I know this won't be a popular response but FWIW it is okay to hate the bitch and still be a great father to your son. And hate can be healthy. If she had any respect for you IMO she would have never deceived you to the point of you having to catch her with the dude. She should have come to you prior to moving on to a physical relationship with another person. Was the deceit a fall back plan in case it didn't work out with the other guy considering she knew his past history. She sounds like a typical selfish person to me.
I'm not in the camp that it is okay to stray from a relationship if two parties are willing to work it out when the consequences from that infidelity come to light. That is a have your cake and eat it mentality. A mentality that usually does not stand the course of a lifetime required in a healthy marriage. Best advice to give is to move on physically and mentally. Become an advocate of yourself and your son. Do not consider her feelings any longer. And enjoy the rest of your life like a ****ing rock star.
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