-- This or That -- Episode#1
 

A new weekly thread where I'm entering two scenarios - and asking of you to vote on which scenario you'd prefer.

Please choose which you'd prefer out of the two options.

That is a very difficult choice.

FAX

Eh - I can deal with 50 minutes.

I'm not a huge bourbon fan - I tend to use Rye in cocktails and could use Canadian whiskey as a suitable alternative to bourbon in most mixed drinks.

But I would miss the occasional Jack and Coke. And honestly, giving up Pizza would just be damn tough because the REST of the world hasn't. It isn't as though Pizza would cease to exist - I've experienced it now and my friends/family are still gonna be eating plenty of it in my presence.

Had Pizza simply been blinked out of existence before I was born, that's one thing. But he knowledge that I'll one day be sitting with my friends and family while they're eating a Jumbo Combo from Minskeys' and I'll have to pretend that this ****ing calzone is just as good?

Nah, hard pass. I'll take the Peanut butter midget massage.

Let me see.
I like Pizza-check
I like Bourbon-check
I like Crunchy Peanut Butter-check
I like Peter Hayden Dinklage-check
I like massages-check



Going with the Massage and crunchy butter please

And can you clarify Jiff or Skippy please?
Get that Peter Pan shit outa here

I chose the massage but had to look up who that person was, as well as whom he would be dressed as. No, I am not 70 years old (save the 'OK Boomer' shit).


But I can endure practically anything for 50 minutes, so why sacrifice a two beautiful, yet simple pleasures in life just to avoid a pretentious midget's little sausage fingers working over your glutes and hammies? Take a shower, drink copious amounts of bourbon to help process what just went down, then have some pizza the next day as your hangover cure. Done-zo.

I’m NOT giving up pizza. The stakes don’t matter.

Cross Country trip in a Ford Festiva with Ubeja Vontell, or have in58men bring his bullet smoker and a 12 pack over to your place for a cookout?

It's just a plain jar and the label is simply black and white and says 'Chunky Style Peanut Butter.'

Massage... the conversation would be worth the sticky mess..

clarify...do you have to eat the peanut butter, or is the guy massaging me w/it?
sec

Massage and it's not close. I'm not even sure I understand the decision here.

Option 1: Something terrible happens
Option 2: Something kinda weird happens that will make for a great story

I bet dwarf hands are strong AF. Like getting massaged by 10 thumbs. Dinklage all day

Dwarfs are freaky strong...

he's rubbing you down in Chunky Peanut Butter.