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Hammock Parties 07-21-2012 02:57 AM

The Declaration Of Independence, MO - The People vs. Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel
The Declaration Of Independence, MO

The People vs. Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel

When in the course of football events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the fandom bands which have connected them with a Quarterback, and to assume among the Powers of the NFL, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Football and of the NFL's Goodell entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all Quarterbacks are not created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain Unalienable Talents, that among these are Arm Strength, Accuracy and the Pursuit of Championships.

That to secure these talents, Quarterbacks are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the Consent of the Fanbase, That whenever any Form of Quarterback becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Quarterbacks, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Attendance At Arrowhead and Hope For A Championship.

Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Quarterbacks Long Established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably The Same Offense evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to Throw Off Such Quarterbacks, and to provide new Guards (however, neither left nor right) for their Future Rooting Interests.

Such has been the patient sufferance of these Chiefs Fans; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Offense. The history of the present Quarterback is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an Absolute Run-First Offense over the State of Missouri.

To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.

Cassel 3:16


Playoff Teams Beat Cassel At An Alarming Rate


Winning Teams Beat Cassel At An Alarming Rate


Cassel Lacks Deep Passing Ability


Cassel Makes Offensive Linemen Worse


Cassel Struggles Against Good Defenses At An Alarming Rate


Cassel Struggles Against Elite Quarterbacks At An Alarming Rate


We, therefore, the Representatives of the United States of Chiefs Fans, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme GM of Arrowhead for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Chiefs, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Chiefs fans are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent of Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel.

That they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the Patriot Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of New England, is and ought to be totally dissolved.

And that as Free and Independent Chiefs Fans, they have full Power to levy Boos, conclude Peace, contract Alliances with Dwayne Bowe, establish Commerce with Top Five Picks, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent Fans may of right do.

And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Playoff Fortunes and our Sacred Fandom.


This post made possible by SNR, Coogs and The Gang Of 14.
Statistics compiled by ESPN, PFF and PFR

Dedicated to 'Hamas' Jenkins, our Patrick Henry, who said "Give Me Sanchez, Or Give Me Death."

For further details, please review The Pioli Facts.

The Declaration has been updated with statistics from 2012 and FINALIZED. Remove Matt Cassel from Kansas City. FOREVER.

|Zach| 07-21-2012 03:02 AM

Holy shit you have no life.

Chief_For_Life58 07-21-2012 03:06 AM

Chief for life approves this message

Hammock Parties 07-21-2012 03:08 AM


Originally Posted by |Zach| (Post 8757275)
Holy shit you have no life.


Munson 07-21-2012 03:29 AM

There is so much Cassel fail in this thread that I can't even wrap my mind around it.

F*** YOU PIOLI! :banghead:

Bane 07-21-2012 03:45 AM

If Pioli watched that and didn't hang himself I'd shit bricks!

kcxiv 07-21-2012 03:52 AM

lol, Everyone needs to tweet this shit out to Anyone thats in the media. haha

Munson 07-21-2012 04:00 AM

This is the greatest anti-Cassel manifesto ever written in the history of the world. :clap:

BigMeatballDave 07-21-2012 04:09 AM

So, Cassel sucks?

Brand new information.

Hammock Parties 07-21-2012 04:16 AM

Also, Barret got this ball rolling.


Originally Posted by Barret (Post 8753487)
Is there a chance that someone could come up with a sticky post that lists ALL the damning evidence against Matt Cassel so we can have it in 1 area? This way if someone has to educate the brain dead minions out there we can just link that and be done with it.

Thank you in advance if someone steps up to the plate and completes such a thing.

kcxiv 07-21-2012 04:29 AM

Only thing missing is the matt in the hat gif. That was total ****ing failure against the Chargers. lol

threebag02 07-21-2012 04:50 AM

I ****ing hate you Matt Cassel.

Ace Gunner 07-21-2012 05:30 AM

hahahaha Brilliant W. (name withheld)

-King- 07-21-2012 05:35 AM


Originally Posted by Dave (Post 8757284)
So, Cassel sucks?

Brand new information.

Pretty much.
Posted via Mobile Device

BoneKrusher 07-21-2012 05:52 AM

i only have one question after looking at this thread.
how can Pioli or any GM in the league say Matt Cassel is our starter?

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