World's First Zombie Discovered in Ohio.
 

Living Man Told He Is Legally Dead By Court

Quick summary:

Alcoholic dad abandons his family and goes missing. After a while, he's declared legally dead so the children can get social security benefits. 19 years later he comes back, goes to court, and wants to be declared alive.

He lost. After 3 years in Ohio, you can't change a declaration of death.

Stupid thread title is stupid.

Not the worlds first zombie...

Believe I did some kind of book report\research paper or something on zombies over twenty years ago. Haitians knock people out with a drug and when they come back to reality they're usually buried alive until the haitian voodoo which doctor digs them up, which point they've suffered brain damage and are basically pseudo farm slaves. Haitians called them "zonbies" in the 1700's - twentieth century... Probably the sketchiest shit every done to somebody in the history of man kind.

Okay.

which doctor ≠ witch doctor

So does this guy get to live life carte blanche from here on out?

"I don't need to pay taxes. I'm dead."
"You can't take me to jail, I'm dead."
"How could I have banged your wife? I'm dead."
"I didn't steal those millions of dollars. I'm dead."

"You just banged me and I want to ruin your reputation -You necrophiliac! I'm dead!"

Yea. I made a typo. Got it.

Thanks for getting my hopes up for nothing!!!!

get drunk for 19 years and get declared dead then no longer have to pay taxes

win?

wtf?

They are still going to want their taxes
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and dog license fees