For clarification, how dark is the grey? I just Googled "dark grey" and some of those are pretty close to black.. and the closer they get the less they'll match.

You may just have to go with the black loafers anyway, though. I don't think white shoes are a good choice in a formal setting and, really, your only other option would be some variation of brown.

Yeah. Listen to this guy. He knows more about that stuff than me.

WHERE'S SR WHEN WE NEED HIM MOST!?

The black loafers wouldn't look ok with dress pants, a shirt, and tie? Its not extremely formal...think church-ish.

The boot looking things on the left, are they nice or hideous? Im clueless with this shit.

The one's on the right are loafers? They look like ladies cowboy boots or some shit.

I wouldn't wear them with ANYTHING, let alone a suit. :D

Using THIS image as a guide (I just noticed you posted more than one).

http://s30.postimg.org/uxfw5c8cx/20140326_162206.jpg

Wear the ones with the silver buckle, on the left.

Its pretty dark...close to black but its grey if you look close.

Manscaping:
Completely bare or closely shorn?

Ok I thought you meant left in the other picture. So these will go with dark grey dress pants even though they're black? I would buy new shoes but I rarely ever dress up. I have a court date coming up too to prevent my ex from relocating my kids to another state and plan to wear a black suit, would these black shoes with the buckle go with a suit at all or do I need to buy new shoes?

Me too. They'd go well with a dark grey suit.

LMAO That's what I was thinking.

Are those nice enough to wear with a black suit/shirt/tie?

They'd go with a grey suit just fine. What else are you going to wear? Grey shoes are kinda tacky and white shoes? Oh hell no...

Black shoes are your friend if you're wearing a neutral color like black or grey.

Thanks guys. I'm clueless when it comes to this shit, I only "dress up" once every few years. Rep.