Home Mail MemberMap Chat (0) Wallpapers
Go Back   ChiefsPlanet > Hall of Classics

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 07-04-2003, 03:43 PM  
Bwana Bwana is offline
GONE FISHING
 
Bwana's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Billings, Montana
Casino cash: $9180
The Score Has Been Evened.......For Now.

So I'm sitting here minding my own business, relaxing when I start hearing explosions over the top of my house. Aww yes, the unmistakable sound of bottle rockets. There is one rental house in my neighborhood, two houses down across the alley. It seems to attract loud music playing hell raising punk types. In any event, I get pissed off when this keeps up and go out into the backyard. I find several Bottle Rocket sticks. At this point I am left with three choices...

1.) Go to their back gate, call one of them out, beat his ass. This one is more my style and I would have enjoyed it the most hands down, but I would likely end up in the big house for the night and my wife would not be pleased when she had to come and bail me out.

2.) Call the cops and report the little fuggers. This one is just to easy and I'm not the nark type.

3.) It seems I have a few "bird bombs" left over from "the day." For those of you who do not know what these masterpieces are, they are in a 12 gauge shotgun shell and are basically an M-80 that zips through the air when you fire it out of the shotgun. They go about 100 feet before they explode. These are used by ranchers to run off the geese when they land in the wheat fields and are VERY loud.

I grab the 12 gauge, crack one of my house windows, line it up over the fence and let it rip. The next few moments were priceless! All you could hear were gems like "Jesus Christ!" "Where did that come from?!!"What the fug was that!!! Oh my God!" It seems I still have 24 rounds left if the little cockroaches start again. Bonus......I know as a fact they have no clue where it came from.
Posts: 47,783
Bwana has disabled reputation
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-05-2003, 03:35 PM   #91
jettio jettio is offline
MVP
 

Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Kansas City
Casino cash: $5000
Quote:
Originally posted by Bwana


Trust me numbnuts, the little pricks knew exactly where the bird bombs were coming from when it was all said and done last night.

Paint the picture any way you see fit, whatever makes you feel warm and fuzzy. If being the champion of meth monkeys gives you that warm glow inside, knock yourself out strokestick.
Well, if you did let the meth heads in on your secret, Bully for You.

I guess you realize that I was right about how your story did not make sense.

Maybe you could have just said that you realized it instead of letting Brock, Logical, goad you into their stupid name calling act.

You should be proud. Be sure to tell all of your other neighbors and the Police about your activities.

Maybe I was wrong about that you only did something you wanted to do and created a false justification for it.

Tell you what, if you were right to do it. Keep on doing it. Keep firing off your no longer secret gay bird bombs and keep the Planet updated. You owe it to your fans.
__________________
Where Ignorance is Bliss, 'Tis Folly to be Wise.

__
Posts: 6,968
jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-05-2003, 03:38 PM   #92
Nelson Muntz Nelson Muntz is offline
Ha Ha
 
Nelson Muntz's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2000
Casino cash: $5000
God I love bird bombs

Reminds me of the time I set one off with a fuse and a cigarette to get even with a lady that lived by the place I used to work. By the time it went off I was 10 minutes out of town. From what I heard later, there were 3 city cops, 1 sheriff, 2 firetrucks, and an ambulence, because people thought a bakery was exploding or that someone shot themself.
Posts: 1,012
Nelson Muntz is a favorite in the douche of the year contest.Nelson Muntz is a favorite in the douche of the year contest.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-05-2003, 03:41 PM   #93
jettio jettio is offline
MVP
 

Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Kansas City
Casino cash: $5000
Quote:
Originally posted by Skip Towne
What did you shoot?
Embarrassed to say. On the Planet golf outing thread, I posted about how I had shortened the shafts and regripped the clubs.

Well, I hit the ball sweet the next time I played, but lost about 2 clubs distance per club. So, I learned how to reshaft them back to standard length and did a hack job of bending the lie angles without measuring them.

Have been playing bad since. I am going to have to get a bending vice, bending bar, and the loft-lie angle measure from Golfsmith, so that I can get the clubs back to where I can play well with them.
__________________
Where Ignorance is Bliss, 'Tis Folly to be Wise.

__
Posts: 6,968
jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-05-2003, 03:43 PM   #94
chief52 chief52 is offline
Veteran
 
chief52's Avatar
 

Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: NoCal
Casino cash: $5175
Quote:
Originally posted by jettio


Well, if you did let the meth heads in on your secret, Bully for You.

I guess you realize that I was right about how your story did not make sense.

Maybe you could have just said that you realized it instead of letting Brock, Logical, goad you into their stupid name calling act.

You should be proud. Be sure to tell all of your other neighbors and the Police about your activities.

Maybe I was wrong about that you only did something you wanted to do and created a false justification for it.

Tell you what, if you were right to do it. Keep on doing it. Keep firing off your no longer secret gay bird bombs and keep the Planet updated. You owe it to your fans.
Damn, it must suck being you. Does everything piss you off? Have a nice weekend
Posts: 3,100
chief52 is not part of the Right 53.chief52 is not part of the Right 53.chief52 is not part of the Right 53.chief52 is not part of the Right 53.chief52 is not part of the Right 53.chief52 is not part of the Right 53.chief52 is not part of the Right 53.chief52 is not part of the Right 53.chief52 is not part of the Right 53.chief52 is not part of the Right 53.chief52 is not part of the Right 53.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-05-2003, 03:44 PM   #95
Phobia Phobia is offline
Together is Powerful
 
Phobia's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: KCMO
Casino cash: $5147
Quote:
Originally posted by Slim_Shady
God I love bird bombs

Reminds me of the time I set one off with a fuse and a cigarette to get even with a lady that lived by the place I used to work. By the time it went off I was 10 minutes out of town. From what I heard later, there were 3 city cops, 1 sheriff, 2 firetrucks, and an ambulence, because people thought a bakery was exploding or that someone shot themself.
- I remember that story.

Careful, though. Jettio is starting an anti birdbomb movement. He's calling it BBOOB.

I'll let somebody more creative than I complete the acronym.
Posts: 55,733
Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-05-2003, 03:46 PM   #96
jettio jettio is offline
MVP
 

Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Kansas City
Casino cash: $5000
Quote:
Originally posted by Phobia


Oh, he didn't play. He just goes to the golf course to hide in the bushes and blow airhorns at golfers in their backswing.

Wouldn't that be ironic?


I tried some of those soynuts as a snack at the golf course, but found out that it makes the foghorn too loud a couple of holes later.
__________________
Where Ignorance is Bliss, 'Tis Folly to be Wise.

__
Posts: 6,968
jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-05-2003, 03:47 PM   #97
Talisman Talisman is offline
Start 'em young
 
Talisman's Avatar
 

Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Des Moines, IA
Casino cash: $5531
Quote:
Originally posted by jettio
Well, if you did let the meth heads in on your secret, Bully for You.

I guess you realize that I was right about how your story did not make sense.

Maybe you could have just said that you realized it instead of letting Brock, Logical, goad you into their stupid name calling act.

You should be proud. Be sure to tell all of your other neighbors and the Police about your activities.

Maybe I was wrong about that you only did something you wanted to do and created a false justification for it.

Tell you what, if you were right to do it. Keep on doing it. Keep firing off your no longer secret gay bird bombs and keep the Planet updated. You owe it to your fans.
Why can't you just agree to disagree and stop with the holier-than-thou attitude? At first I thought you had just had a bad day, but now you're coming off as a pompous jerk. Is this issue really that important to you?
Attached Images
File Type: jpg rainonparade.jpg (18.0 KB, 300 views)
Posts: 6,544
Talisman is not part of the Right 53.Talisman is not part of the Right 53.Talisman is not part of the Right 53.Talisman is not part of the Right 53.Talisman is not part of the Right 53.Talisman is not part of the Right 53.Talisman is not part of the Right 53.Talisman is not part of the Right 53.Talisman is not part of the Right 53.Talisman is not part of the Right 53.Talisman is not part of the Right 53.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-05-2003, 03:48 PM   #98
Nelson Muntz Nelson Muntz is offline
Ha Ha
 
Nelson Muntz's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2000
Casino cash: $5000
Quote:
Originally posted by Talisman


Why can't you just agree to disagree and stop with the holier-than-thou attitude? At first I thought you had just had a bad day, but now you're coming off as a pompous jerk. Is this issue really that important to you?


Posts: 1,012
Nelson Muntz is a favorite in the douche of the year contest.Nelson Muntz is a favorite in the douche of the year contest.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-05-2003, 03:50 PM   #99
Nelson Muntz Nelson Muntz is offline
Ha Ha
 
Nelson Muntz's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2000
Casino cash: $5000
Quote:
Originally posted by Phobia


- I remember that story.

Careful, though. Jettio is starting an anti birdbomb movement. He's calling it BBOOB.

I'll let somebody more creative than I complete the acronym.

I couldn't remember if i had told it or not. oh well, i still laugh my ass off when thinking about it.


Jettio's probably just pissed cuz his mommy wouldn't let him by any snap-n-pops this year
Posts: 1,012
Nelson Muntz is a favorite in the douche of the year contest.Nelson Muntz is a favorite in the douche of the year contest.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-05-2003, 03:51 PM   #100
LVNHACK LVNHACK is offline
MVP
 
LVNHACK's Avatar
 

Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Baghdad
Casino cash: $5000
Quote:
Originally posted by jettio


Well, if you did let the meth heads in on your secret, Bully for You.

I guess you realize that I was right about how your story did not make sense.

Maybe you could have just said that you realized it instead of letting Brock, Logical, goad you into their stupid name calling act.

You should be proud. Be sure to tell all of your other neighbors and the Police about your activities.

Maybe I was wrong about that you only did something you wanted to do and created a false justification for it.

Tell you what, if you were right to do it. Keep on doing it. Keep firing off your no longer secret gay bird bombs and keep the Planet updated. You owe it to your fans.



And people think I'm an asshole.....................
__________________
Bleach really should be used in the gene pool

Some people grow up, some just grow old.
Posts: 13,819
LVNHACK would the whole thing.LVNHACK would the whole thing.LVNHACK would the whole thing.LVNHACK would the whole thing.LVNHACK would the whole thing.LVNHACK would the whole thing.LVNHACK would the whole thing.LVNHACK would the whole thing.LVNHACK would the whole thing.LVNHACK would the whole thing.LVNHACK would the whole thing.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-05-2003, 03:55 PM   #101
jettio jettio is offline
MVP
 

Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Kansas City
Casino cash: $5000
Quote:
Originally posted by Phobia


- I remember that story.

Careful, though. Jettio is starting an anti birdbomb movement. He's calling it BBOOB.

I'll let somebody more creative than I complete the acronym.
I am all for bird bombs. I just thought it was kind of Ted Kascynski-ish to act as if he had some kind of justification for it, and to do it secretly. While claiming that it was intended to address the fact that bottle rockets disturbed his enjoyment of his property.

I actually pointed it out in a way that did not require the conniption he had.
__________________
Where Ignorance is Bliss, 'Tis Folly to be Wise.

__
Posts: 6,968
jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-05-2003, 03:57 PM   #102
Nelson Muntz Nelson Muntz is offline
Ha Ha
 
Nelson Muntz's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2000
Casino cash: $5000
Quote:
Originally posted by jettio


I am all for bird bombs. I just thought it was kind of Ted Kascynski-ish to act as if he had some kind of justification for it, and to do it secretly. While claiming that it was intended to address the fact that bottle rockets disturbed his enjoyment of his property.

I actually pointed it out in a way that did not require the conniption he had.
He probably didn't announce that he was going to do it, cuz I'm sure the cops can find something to arrest you for when you use bird bombs in a manner other than directed.
Posts: 1,012
Nelson Muntz is a favorite in the douche of the year contest.Nelson Muntz is a favorite in the douche of the year contest.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-05-2003, 04:00 PM   #103
jettio jettio is offline
MVP
 

Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Kansas City
Casino cash: $5000
Quote:
Originally posted by Talisman


Why can't you just agree to disagree and stop with the holier-than-thou attitude? At first I thought you had just had a bad day, but now you're coming off as a pompous jerk. Is this issue really that important to you?
No, I just realized that I had posted replies to several of the morning posts and thought it disrespectful not to address Bwana's reply.

I thought he deserved a reply if I replied to the others.

I really do not care that much about it.

I am sorry that I did not agree with everyone else that thought it was a wonderful idea.

Hopefully, Bwana will ignore my lone voice and keep bird-bombing the neighborhood.
__________________
Where Ignorance is Bliss, 'Tis Folly to be Wise.

__

Last edited by jettio; 07-06-2003 at 08:33 AM..
Posts: 6,968
jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-05-2003, 04:01 PM   #104
jettio jettio is offline
MVP
 

Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Kansas City
Casino cash: $5000
Quote:
Originally posted by Slim_Shady



I couldn't remember if i had told it or not. oh well, i still laugh my ass off when thinking about it.


Jettio's probably just pissed cuz his mommy wouldn't let him by any snap-n-pops this year
__________________
Where Ignorance is Bliss, 'Tis Folly to be Wise.

__
Posts: 6,968
jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.jettio must have mowed badgirl's lawn.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-05-2003, 04:03 PM   #105
Phobia Phobia is offline
Together is Powerful
 
Phobia's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: KCMO
Casino cash: $5147
Quote:
Originally posted by jettio
I am all for bird bombs. I just thought it was kind of Ted Kascynski-ish to act as if he had some kind of justification for it, and to do it secretly. While claiming that it was intended to address the fact that bottle rockets disturbed his enjoyment of his property.

I actually pointed it out in a way that did not require the conniption he had.
Having known and read Bwana stories for ~5 years, I don't think he's the type of person to shy from a physical confrontation. Basically, you're calling him a puss because of the covert nature of his story. Hello? That's half of the reason the story is so damned funny!

You're wrong, but I don't care if you keep flipping Bwana shit. He's a big boy.
Posts: 55,733
Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.Phobia is obviously part of the inner Circle.
  Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On

Forum Jump




All times are GMT -6. The time now is 04:28 AM.


This is a test for a client's site.
A new website that shows member-created construction site listings that need fill or have excess fill. Dirt Monkey @ https://DirtMonkey.net
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.0
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.