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Old 02-18-2013, 05:21 PM  
Rain Man Rain Man is offline
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My quest for the perfect birthday photo.

If you read the chiefsplanet tabloids at all, you probably know that I'm about to turn fifty.

Fifty.

It's a time of reflection. A time of taking stock. And to a great extent, it's a time of figuring out how you should celebrate surviving a half-century of life on earth, which for the most part is reserved for humans, turtles, parrots, and some mosses and large tree species.

So as my birthday's headlights began appearing over the horizon, my wife asked me how I want to celebrate it. She's older than me, and on her fiftieth we hosted a big party with all of her friends and five really awesome cakes, each decorated to reflect one decade of her life. It was a very nice party, and it made her happy to celebrate it with her friends.

She asked if I wanted to have a party with my friends, but I thought about it and said no. My fiftieth birthday should be bigger than just hanging out on Chiefsplanet for a few hours and fedexing you some cake.

What, then, should we do? I gave it some thought, but she nixed my initial suggestion of a threesome. Honestly I didn't expect that to fly anyway.

My second choice, however, did, and it became my quest. For my fiftieth birthday, I want to take a really cool and memorable fiftieth birthday photo.

After several months of planning, the process has begun. I will post pictures of my progress.

Let me begin by saying that if you fly, you should fly first class. I seldom do, but I shot up a decade or so of frequent flyer miles and got "the pod", one of those first-class seats that folds completely flat into a bed. [ferris bueller voice] If you have the means, I highly recommend picking one up on a long flight. [/bueller] Plus, you get a nice big screen with hundreds of movies and TV shows, and they give you a little bowl of cashews before every meal. Choice.
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Old 03-25-2013, 12:17 AM   #46
AussieChiefsFan AussieChiefsFan is offline
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Saw a Rainman post in the experimental soda thread and it spawned me to bump this thread. We've all been waiting for the perfect photo
This
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Old 03-25-2013, 12:43 AM   #47
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The truth is, he never got one. We're going to have to do this all over again in another 50 years. Sucks.
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Old 03-25-2013, 01:18 AM   #48
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Old 03-25-2013, 11:23 AM   #49
Rain Man Rain Man is offline
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I am indeed back. Now I just have to sort through my photos to pick my official birthday photo.

It was a good run. In 35 days, I accomplished the following:

12,200 airline miles
6,700 sea miles
400 taxicab solicitations, more or less
80 Easter Island moai, more or less
60 minutes on a submarine
50 miles driving a mini-SUV on Easter Island
40 dollars worth of various foreign currencies in my pocket that I don't think I can exchange
20+ colonial cathedrals
18 nights on a cruise ship (the Carnival Splendor)
15 really cool travel magnets for the refrigerator
6 countries (Antigua, Argentina, Barbados, Brazil, Chile, and Peru)
5th continent riding a subway, which is a world record (probably tied with a lot of other people)
3 interesting cemeteries, including Evita Peron's grave and reasonable proximity to Pizarro's grave
2 llama burgers
2 volcanic craters
1 conquistador's home
1 terrorist threat
1 subterranean catacomb
1 night at sea with 20 foot waves and 70 mph winds (but aye, she was a sturdy and solid ship)
1 cup of Argentine mate
1 police stop by virtue of being in an insanely driven taxi
1 birdman cult dwelling
1 trophy for winning the cartoon trivia contest on the cruise ship
1 bottle of Inca Kola (diet - I don't really recommend it)
1 traffic accident (minor)
1 erotic pottery display

Overall, it was a good 50th birthday.
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Old 03-25-2013, 11:41 AM   #50
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Pretty impressive travel log. How did llama burger taste?
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Old 03-25-2013, 11:50 AM   #51
stevieray stevieray is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rain Man View Post
1 night at sea with 20 foot waves and 70 mph winds (but aye, she was a sturdy and solid ship.
....does the wife know you're sharing her/your most intimate moments with CP?
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Old 03-25-2013, 11:50 AM   #52
teedubya teedubya is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rain Man View Post
I am indeed back. Now I just have to sort through my photos to pick my official birthday photo.

It was a good run. In 35 days, I accomplished the following:

12,200 airline miles
6,700 sea miles
400 taxicab solicitations, more or less
80 Easter Island moai, more or less
60 minutes on a submarine
50 miles driving a mini-SUV on Easter Island
40 dollars worth of various foreign currencies in my pocket that I don't think I can exchange
20+ colonial cathedrals
18 nights on a cruise ship (the Carnival Splendor)
15 really cool travel magnets for the refrigerator
6 countries (Antigua, Argentina, Barbados, Brazil, Chile, and Peru)
5th continent riding a subway, which is a world record (probably tied with a lot of other people)
3 interesting cemeteries, including Evita Peron's grave and reasonable proximity to Pizarro's grave
2 llama burgers
2 volcanic craters
1 conquistador's home
1 terrorist threat
1 subterranean catacomb
1 night at sea with 20 foot waves and 70 mph winds (but aye, she was a sturdy and solid ship)
1 cup of Argentine mate
1 police stop by virtue of being in an insanely driven taxi
1 birdman cult dwelling
1 trophy for winning the cartoon trivia contest on the cruise ship
1 bottle of Inca Kola (diet - I don't really recommend it)
1 traffic accident (minor)
1 erotic pottery display

Overall, it was a good 50th birthday.
This is all great and everything... but where is the ****ing picture?!!
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Old 03-25-2013, 11:52 AM   #53
Dartgod Dartgod is offline
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Originally Posted by patteeu View Post
Pretty impressive travel log. How did llama burger taste?
Must not have been too bad since he didn't stop at one.

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Old 03-25-2013, 11:57 AM   #54
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Originally Posted by Dartgod View Post
Must not have been too bad since he didn't stop at one.

Excellent point.
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