Best Bar Stories Ever

[Saccopoo]

In light of actually seeing C.E. with a green rep bar, I'd figure that I'd post my recent experience of embracing a miracle as well:

So, last week Tuesday, I was at a pub-ish establishment and the 25 year old really hot niece of the corporate CEO walks in with her mother out of the blue and joins me and a co-worker for a couple of drinks.

A couple turn into 20 or so, and her mother and my co-worker leave and shit gets a little weird.

Anywho, after a good conversation about three ways with a stripper and "I'd be happy to take to to a Performing Arts Center for your first time" shit, I meet her back there the next evening with me and the same co-worker of the night before and lo and behold within 45 minutes this veritable goddess is sitting at the table right next to us by herself with a low cut sweater and huge tracts of land bursting.

For at least 45 minutes I make my best attempt to ignore her visually...go to the restroom and as I'm coming out, the busty goddess is standing in the hall waiting for me. (Seriously. I shit you not.) With nothing else coming to mind, I ask her to join us, which she does, and five or six tequila shots later we are all having a great time.

And the 25 year old is really, really, really digging her and vice versa and, well, my co-worker leaves and, yeah...

So, I'm wondering, is this my lottery ticket for life? Shit couldn't have gone down any more perfect and, so...what now?

And I mean, super hot. I ask my co-worker the next day, on a 1 to 10 scale how hot...and he says 11 or a 11.5.

So what the **** do I have to look forward to at this point? I can't imagine shit better. I still can't even think/focus/care.

What the **** am I supposed to do now?

Anyone have shit like this happen and what do I do with my life from this point on? I mean, guys buy Ferraris and yachts in the hopes of this kind of shit happening.

I'm a bit of a mess with this right now in terms of going forward.

And then the Wendler green bar.

If the Chiefs draft Geno, I'm thinking we all ascend.

[Deberg_1990]

Even Manti Te'o thinks this story has holes

[Canofbier]

You must have been wasted when you wrote that, because there are parts of that story that don't make an ounce of sense.

[Dayze]

my 21st was in Waikiki; went on a booze cruise then to several bars.
I passed out at a table in a very loud club.

Bouncer walked me out. the bar was below ground level so you had to go downa a flight of stairs to get there. we get to the stairway entrance and I stop. He asks "Hey man, c'mon. why are you stopping".

I said 'I'm waiting for that guy first"

"What guy"

"Him" (pointing"


yeah...I was pointing at a reflection of myself in a mirror.

good times.

[Buehler445]

Originally Posted by Dayze

my 21st was in Waikiki; went on a booze cruise then to several bars.
I passed out at a table in a very loud club.

Bouncer walked me out. the bar was below ground level so you had to go downa a flight of stairs to get there. we get to the stairway entrance and I stop. He asks "Hey man, c'mon. why are you stopping".

I said 'I'm waiting for that guy first"

"What guy"

"Him" (pointing"


yeah...I was pointing at a reflection of myself in a mirror.

good times.

MOTHER ****. How many million did that cost you?

[KChiefer]

This is 2nd hand but...

So we're having a streetfest last summer and there's a huge crowd. My bud sees two guys start to get in a fight and one of them throws his beer down and goes to throw a punch, then slips in the beer he just threw down and falls on his ass.

[Bo's Pelini]

Originally Posted by bevischief

This is why I don't go out late at night.

Boring.

[Cephalic Trauma]

Originally Posted by Bo's Pelini

Boring.

Everybody knows ginger clubs are hopping!

[Gonzo]

Bars in Omaha are pretty boring I guess. The rowdiest thing I've seen recently is some douche getting thrown out by a bouncer and his shoe thrown at his head.

Lumpy and I went to an Irish pub the other night that can get a little rowdy but all in all not much happens. Just the usual D&D bullshit.

[Saccopoo]

Originally Posted by Canofbier

You must have been wasted when you wrote that, because there are parts of that story that don't make an ounce of sense.

A little bit wasted, but it's pretty much truth.

I could go on about the time that I was in Miami in 2000, got crushed, crashed a party, tipped over an entire table of drinks and an ice sculpture, had the hotel security (two of them) escort me back to my room, drop a cocktail on the floor splattering glass everywhere, clean that shit up, shower, go back out to the hot tub area (after the security guys leave - ****ers stayed outside my door for at least 45 minutes), hook up with some girls there, mess around, go back to my room - shower again, dress up, start to wander about South Beach, casually walk by CroBar and start to talk to some dude out front, he takes me in, gives me the grand tour (as he's one of the owners - as I find out during the tour), get into the VIP room, have drinks with Tim Hardaway (who is playing a game the next day btw) and dance with Naomi Campbell. Go back to the hotel after some weird shit that I'm not going to divulge and wake up and do the sales meeting, training, seminar shit the next day.

So there is that.

[Bo's Pelini]

Originally Posted by Gonzo

Bars in Omaha are pretty boring I guess. The rowdiest thing I've seen recently is some douche getting thrown out by a bouncer and his shoe thrown at his head.

Lumpy and I went to an Irish pub the other night that can get a little rowdy but all in all not much happens. Just the usual D&D bullshit.

Youve obviously never partied with bugeater and livesteam