Famous Flatulii

**Bob Dole** · 09-17-2001, 11:07 AM

Bob Dole has previously posted about Bob Dole's encounter with Joe Montana in the men's room at Tom Fooleries on the Plaza in KC. Though uneventful, it's been a fairly decent story for quite a few years.

Until today, Bob Dole didn't really think much about the circumstances, but now Bob Dole is concerned that perhaps some sort of strange karma-thing is making itself felt.

Bob Dole was in the men's room across the hall from Bob Dole's office about 10 minutes ago, disposing of the last 2 pots of black coffee. A typical run-of-the-mill everyday occurance that Bob Dole is certain many of the people on here have in common.

Anyway, as with the Joe Montana story, the door opens and Bob Dole turns to look (without coughing, thank you) and Ross Perot strolls in and steps up to the urinal next to Bob Dole.

This makes 2 urinal encounters, and Bob Dole is wondering WTF is up with that?

Besides the connection with the previous encounter, this story is only bettered by the fact that Mr. Perot proceeded to do his best impression of General Colon Bowel barking out orders. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, even the very wealthy are apparently afflicted with flatulence now and again.

Unbelievable.

(And if anyone has any thoughts on why Bob Dole seems to be destined for a life of strange urinal encounters, feel free to jump in and explain...)

**Phobia** · 09-17-2001, 11:11 AM

I had every opportunity to become a public figure and I've rebuked each one.

I've long had an aversion to having my bodily functions discussed anywhere outside my presence - and this is a prime example of why I chose the lesser known path.

Shame on you, Bob Dole. Can't a man flatuate in privacy without it appearing in the headlines?

Betcha you could make $1000 by selling this story to the Globe....

NaptownChief · 09-17-2001, 11:12 AM

That is a great story...

Is he as whimpy looking in person as he looks on TV?

Baby Lee · 09-17-2001, 11:15 AM

So you were on "pee row" with Mr. Perot?

Did he 'bark out orders' with the same annoying insistence and Texas drawl as he displayed while debating Gore in Larry King.

Back in college, I submitted a cartoon to the school's underground paper. Pretty good likenesses of Gore outside a stall knocking and Perot inside 'taking care of business.' The title was 'the debate continues' and Perot's speech ballon said "will, you let me finish. . Can I finish. . etc."

Joe Seahawk · 09-17-2001, 11:16 AM

You have actually smelled a Ross Perot fart...Congrats...

Colonel Bowel...LOL

Baby Lee · 09-17-2001, 11:19 AM

BTW Bob - did you thank him for costing you the election in '96 and relegating you to keeping your dog from jerking off to Britney Spears commercials?

**ChiefGator** · 09-17-2001, 11:19 AM

I hope once he was done flatulating that you said "Hey! That sounds like Ross Perot squeeking!"

::chuckle::

- Mark
One of the 20% to vote for him the first time and 8% to vote for Ross the second time.

BroncoFan · 09-17-2001, 11:21 AM

looking forward to an encounter with mr. dole at one of the urinals i frequent.

Baby Lee · 09-17-2001, 11:23 AM

Quote:

looking forward to an encounter with mr. dole at one of the urinals i frequent.

Funny BroncoFan - I figured you for more of a 'glory hole' kind of guy. Just Kidding.

[opps sorry, no teeth]

Radar Chief · 09-17-2001, 11:31 AM

Hey now, I just got through eating lunch and don’t care to taste it a second time.

BigOlChiefsfan · 09-17-2001, 11:33 AM

Another Bob Dole/Perot confontation:

Ross:
Urrrrr...Bob Dole....Here's the deal (Brrrrrrrrrrrrap!) just noticed I'm outta terlet paper over here (ffffrrrrrp!) Bob Dole, got any terlet paper (ffrrrrt!) on your side of the stall?

Bob Dole:
Bob Dole has toilet paper, but not much. Bob Dole has just enough TP for Bob Dole. Sorry, Ross. Bob Dole has to make some hard decisions.

Ross:
Dagnabbit, I'll remember this Bob (toot!) Here's the deal...have you got 4 singles for a $5?

**Bob Dole** · 09-17-2001, 11:41 AM

He looks pretty much like he looked on television.

Bob Dole just had to leave quickly before Bob Dole busted out laughing or made some smartazz remark. Didn't stick around long enough to sample the wind...

BigOlChiefsfan · 09-17-2001, 11:43 AM

"(And if anyone has any thoughts on why Bob Dole seems to be destined for a life of strange urinal encounters, feel free to jump in and explain...)"

It's a European thing. All the time European with the rich and famous.

seclark · 09-17-2001, 11:46 AM

did his ears wiggle when he cut loose? maybe a pie chart showing what the duck call was made up of?
sec

**Phobia** · 09-17-2001, 11:48 AM

European -

Haven't heard that joke in a LONG time....

09-17-2001, 11:07 AM
Bob Dole King Shit of **** Mountain Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Texarkana, Texas Casino cash: $71931	Brush with the Famous, Part II Bob Dole has previously posted about Bob Dole's encounter with Joe Montana in the men's room at Tom Fooleries on the Plaza in KC. Though uneventful, it's been a fairly decent story for quite a few years. Until today, Bob Dole didn't really think much about the circumstances, but now Bob Dole is concerned that perhaps some sort of strange karma-thing is making itself felt. Bob Dole was in the men's room across the hall from Bob Dole's office about 10 minutes ago, disposing of the last 2 pots of black coffee. A typical run-of-the-mill everyday occurance that Bob Dole is certain many of the people on here have in common. Anyway, as with the Joe Montana story, the door opens and Bob Dole turns to look (without coughing, thank you) and Ross Perot strolls in and steps up to the urinal next to Bob Dole. This makes 2 urinal encounters, and Bob Dole is wondering WTF is up with that? Besides the connection with the previous encounter, this story is only bettered by the fact that Mr. Perot proceeded to do his best impression of General Colon Bowel barking out orders. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, even the very wealthy are apparently afflicted with flatulence now and again. Unbelievable. (And if anyone has any thoughts on why Bob Dole seems to be destined for a life of strange urinal encounters, feel free to jump in and explain...)
Posts: 28,485

09-17-2001, 11:11 AM	#2
Phobia Together is Powerful Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: KCMO Casino cash: $2115227000	I had every opportunity to become a public figure and I've rebuked each one. I've long had an aversion to having my bodily functions discussed anywhere outside my presence - and this is a prime example of why I chose the lesser known path. Shame on you, Bob Dole. Can't a man flatuate in privacy without it appearing in the headlines? Betcha you could make $1000 by selling this story to the Globe....
Posts: 52,628

09-17-2001, 11:12 AM	#3
NaptownChief Football Pimp Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: Indianapolis,IN Casino cash: $4738	That is a great story... Is he as whimpy looking in person as he looks on TV? __________________ "We weren't worth a damn," the Kansas City Chiefs head coach said, shaking his head. "I'm not worth a damn. No one's worth a damn..." Former President of the Eric Downing Fan Club and Current President of the Kris"Secret Weapon"Wilson Fan Club
Posts: 4,346

09-17-2001, 11:15 AM	#4
Baby Lee Cake Boss!! Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: State of Sedated Bliss Casino cash: $96070	So you were on "pee row" with Mr. Perot? Did he 'bark out orders' with the same annoying insistence and Texas drawl as he displayed while debating Gore in Larry King. Back in college, I submitted a cartoon to the school's underground paper. Pretty good likenesses of Gore outside a stall knocking and Perot inside 'taking care of business.' The title was 'the debate continues' and Perot's speech ballon said "will, you let me finish. . Can I finish. . etc." __________________ Cake Boss: Oooohhh!! I hate it when people repeat what other people just said. Steven Yuen: What about Cake Boss? Cake Boss: CAKE BOSS!!
Posts: 33,887

09-17-2001, 11:16 AM	#5
Joe Seahawk This place entertains.. Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Seattle Casino cash: $47700	You have actually smelled a Ross Perot fart...Congrats... Colonel Bowel...LOL
Posts: 5,064

09-17-2001, 11:19 AM	#6
Baby Lee Cake Boss!! Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: State of Sedated Bliss Casino cash: $96070	BTW Bob - did you thank him for costing you the election in '96 and relegating you to keeping your dog from jerking off to Britney Spears commercials? __________________ Cake Boss: Oooohhh!! I hate it when people repeat what other people just said. Steven Yuen: What about Cake Boss? Cake Boss: CAKE BOSS!!
Posts: 33,887

09-17-2001, 11:19 AM	#7
ChiefGator Cautiously optimistic Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Northcentral Florida Casino cash: $28107	I hope once he was done flatulating that you said "Hey! That sounds like Ross Perot squeeking!" ::chuckle:: - Mark One of the 20% to vote for him the first time and 8% to vote for Ross the second time.
Posts: 2,432

09-17-2001, 11:21 AM	#8
BroncoFan Missed Everyone Join Date: Aug 2000 Casino cash: $1000	looking forward to an encounter with mr. dole at one of the urinals i frequent.
Posts: 2,052

09-17-2001, 11:31 AM	#10
Radar Chief 7000 RPM of tire churning fury Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: In the box. Casino cash: $85634	Hey now, I just got through eating lunch and don’t care to taste it a second time. __________________ Like "Cool Hand" Luke I'm busting rocks. __/\|_/[___] \|/ \\_\| ---OllllO _( ))~-( ))-0--))
Posts: 19,706

09-17-2001, 11:33 AM	#11
BigOlChiefsfan Certified Bourbon taster Join Date: Aug 2000 Casino cash: $50008302	Another Bob Dole/Perot confontation: Ross: Urrrrr...Bob Dole....Here's the deal (Brrrrrrrrrrrrap!) just noticed I'm outta terlet paper over here (ffffrrrrrp!) Bob Dole, got any terlet paper (ffrrrrt!) on your side of the stall? Bob Dole: Bob Dole has toilet paper, but not much. Bob Dole has just enough TP for Bob Dole. Sorry, Ross. Bob Dole has to make some hard decisions. Ross: Dagnabbit, I'll remember this Bob (toot!) Here's the deal...have you got 4 singles for a $5? __________________ A man can never own too much red wine, too many books, or too much ammunition. -- R. Kipling
Posts: 4,128

09-17-2001, 11:41 AM	#12
Bob Dole King Shit of **** Mountain Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Texarkana, Texas Casino cash: $71931	He looks pretty much like he looked on television. Bob Dole just had to leave quickly before Bob Dole busted out laughing or made some smartazz remark. Didn't stick around long enough to sample the wind...
Posts: 28,485

09-17-2001, 11:43 AM	#13
BigOlChiefsfan Certified Bourbon taster Join Date: Aug 2000 Casino cash: $50008302	"(And if anyone has any thoughts on why Bob Dole seems to be destined for a life of strange urinal encounters, feel free to jump in and explain...)" It's a European thing. All the time European with the rich and famous. __________________ A man can never own too much red wine, too many books, or too much ammunition. -- R. Kipling
Posts: 4,128

09-17-2001, 11:46 AM	#14
seclark MVP Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: nemo Casino cash: $243	did his ears wiggle when he cut loose? maybe a pie chart showing what the duck call was made up of? sec
Posts: 9,406

09-17-2001, 11:48 AM	#15
Phobia Together is Powerful Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: KCMO Casino cash: $2115227000	European - Haven't heard that joke in a LONG time....
Posts: 52,628

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