Psycho ex-stories

[mike_b_284]

I just broke up with my girlfriend this weekend and she isn't taking very well. And by well I mean with a shred of effing sanity. Some crazy shit has been going down. I think she might start stalking me. She came by to get the last of her stuff from my apartment. I went to my room to check to make sure she had everything, when I came out her and my mp3 player were gone. I went to ask for it back and she kept denying it. I wrote it off and left, happy never to talk to her again. I went and played video games at my friend's for a couple hours, then went to quiktrip for some food. While I am eating my hot dog in the parking lot, I look over and there she is. Keep in mind this is twenty minutes from where I live and from where she lives. This means she was driving around for at least forty minutes looking for me. She gets in my car and starts sobbing, telling me she can't sleep and all she can do is cry. I ask for my stuff back and she says no. I tell her to get out of my car and she says no. Finally a cop walks up and asks if everything is okay, before I can tell him to remove the bitch from my car she gets out. She called well over 20 times since then and I am starting to get a little nervous.

How about your craziest ex's? rep to the worst

[Baby Lee]

I'm setting myself to be Endo2.0, but what the hey?

This isn't so much a singular trauma as a cumulative one, in that it happened 4 different times, in almost the exact same way. Twice in HS, twice in college

Broad outlines are as follows. Me and Girl X start something up. Girl X has a good friend who is nice enough, but totally dead to me in 'that way.' A bit of a chunky gal, your typical female wing-[wo]man. As Girl X and I get more and more involved, the chunky one becomes determined that it is in fact she and I who were destined to frolick happily in bliss for eternity. Despite the fact that our interactions never went beyond "hey, what's up?" or "the gangs going to Chucky Cheese, wanna go?" things eventually esacalate to the point where the chunky wingwoman is crying on other friends' shoulder, shouting at my GF in public places, threatening suicide, etc.

Needless to say, my visceral reaction to girls of a certain somataform is . . . strained. I feel horrible about it, and strive to be a decent guy, . . and Lord knows I have no room for particularity at this point, but this just came up recently when a nice, charming, larger girl who was at a party with on New Years put out inquiries after the fact, and I had to apologetically explain my . . condition . . to mutual friends.

[chefsos]

Originally Posted by keg in kc

What about older ones with psycho baggage?

Oh wait, nevermind, you said something about horny old men being a bad thing earlier.

Carry on.

She noted, with some pride, that there were fewer and fewer of us horny old men every year. Someone needs to investigate her friend's pig farm.

[keg in kc]

You know, you might be onto something there.

And Baby Lee, I suffer from the same condition. Which is ironic, since I'm a fat, ugly bastard.

[Raiderhater]

Originally Posted by Bob Dole

JD is a girl?

What, the breasts didn't give it away?

[Jilly]

Originally Posted by Baby Lee

I'm setting myself to be Endo2.0, but what the hey?

This isn't so much a singular trauma as a cumulative one, in that it happened 4 different times, in almost the exact same way. Twice in HS, twice in college

Broad outlines are as follows. Me and Girl X start something up. Girl X has a good friend who is nice enough, but totally dead to me in 'that way.' A bit of a chunky gal, your typical female wing-[wo]man. As Girl X and I get more and more involved, the chunky one becomes determined that it is in fact she and I who were destined to frolick happily in bliss for eternity. Despite the fact that our interactions never went beyond "hey, what's up?" or "the gangs going to Chucky Cheese, wanna go?" things eventually esacalate to the point where the chunky wingwoman is crying on other friends' shoulder, shouting at my GF in public places, threatening suicide, etc.

Needless to say, my visceral reaction to girls of a certain somataform is . . . strained. I feel horrible about it, and strive to be a decent guy, . . and Lord knows I have no room for particularity at this point, but this just came up recently when a nice, charming, larger girl who was at a party with on New Years put out inquiries after the fact, and I had to apologetically explain my . . condition . . to mutual friends.

I'm not trying to generalize, yeah, but look at me do it anyways...but unfortunately, girls of a certain stature often have that same type of personality (unless they are gay), and so your reservations are probably merited. You might try counseling, maybe Oprah, you know, if she has time.

[Katipan]

Fat girls are psycho or gay?

Learn something new every day.

[Jilly]

or jolly

[Baby Lee]

Originally Posted by Mer

Fat girls are psycho or gay?

Learn something new every day.

Let the record reflect that I made the initial post, and expressed my regret over the visceral reaction I have developed. I take no responsibility for the subsequent direction this discussion takes.

[DJay23]

Wow, how appropriate this thread popped up. I've got a fresh one, happened Sunday night.

So I've been seeing this girl since the beginning of December. We'd had a few ups and downs, but after every issue cropped up, things seemed to be better afterward and we seemed to be moving forward quite well.

So Sunday night, I was in a crabby mood. Just one of those things. So she's at my place and we're settling in to watch a movie. She decides she wants some ice cream. I have a new carton of Turkey Hill Peanut Butter Cup (which is more like chocolate ice cream with huge bricks of peanut butter in). So we're scooping this stuff out, and she starts picking all of the big pieces of peanut butter out of the carton. I made a face like, "what the ****?" Finally she says, "what?" I say, "If I wanted chocolate ice cream, I would have bought chocolate ice cream." With this I give in and say, "I'm in a really bad mood, I can't do this tonight, I'm gonna take you home." So she absolutely LOSES it. She goes berserk and starts saying she's never been treated this way in her life, like some piece of shit off the street. She continued on, telling me I'm the most selfish person she's every met and I make her sick to her stomach. I'm trying to stay calm and at the same time calm her down, but she's in irrational PSYCHO mode. Eventually, she's so disgusted by my selfishness (because the jewelry and all of the dinners and countless other movies and shit that I've paid for don't COUNT) that she locks herself in my bathroom and calls her cousin to come get her, only he doesn't answer. I tell her to unlock the door, because in her state I don't trust her (hey, I've got toothbrushes and medication that could be tainted). She refuses, so I tell her I have to take a huge dump (which was true). So she comes out and in the state I'm in, I forget about the shit (I wanted to keep my eye on her). She realizes I don't have to go to the bathroom so she runs back in. I was quick enough to get over and hold the doorknob so she can't lock it and she flips out calling me all sorts of names. I ask her in a calm and rational voice to please just open the door and I won't bother her, but she won't. So I try pushing it open and she's pushing back. Now she's like 110 pounds and I'm 190. You do the math. I start to push and she starts crying like I'm coming in to beat her to death, which is the farthest thing from my mind. Eventually she gives in and lets me in. We sit there in silence and finally I say, "please just let me take you home so I can get on with my life." She agrees. As she is walking out I realize she has my thick wool socks on (I love those damn things). I ask for my socks back, I'll even give her another pair to wear home, I just want those. She tells me, "Go to ****ing hell you selfish piece of shit," while flipping me off right in my face. Finally I had to be loud, and I said, "**** you, you crazy asshole!" (Yes I am a very patient person and it takes a lot to get me to yell or call people names). She went on, in great shock that I could even think that she was crazy, to call me every name she could think of with the word, "****" in heavy rotation. I took her home, not a word was said.

All of this is the truth. I haven't spoken to her since, and I don't want to. I'm already working on my next ex.

She flips out over ice cream? What the hell?

[mike_b_284]

Originally Posted by DJay23

Wow, how appropriate this thread popped up. I've got a fresh one, happened Sunday night.

So I've been seeing this girl since the beginning of December. We'd had a few ups and downs, but after every issue cropped up, things seemed to be better afterward and we seemed to be moving forward quite well.

So Sunday night, I was in a crabby mood. Just one of those things. So she's at my place and we're settling in to watch a movie. She decides she wants some ice cream. I have a new carton of Turkey Hill Peanut Butter Cup (which is more like chocolate ice cream with huge bricks of peanut butter in). So we're scooping this stuff out, and she starts picking all of the big pieces of peanut butter out of the carton. I made a face like, "what the ****?" Finally she says, "what?" I say, "If I wanted chocolate ice cream, I would have bought chocolate ice cream." With this I give in and say, "I'm in a really bad mood, I can't do this tonight, I'm gonna take you home." So she absolutely LOSES it. She goes berserk and starts saying she's never been treated this way in her life, like some piece of shit off the street. She continued on, telling me I'm the most selfish person she's every met and I make her sick to her stomach. I'm trying to stay calm and at the same time calm her down, but she's in irrational PSYCHO mode. Eventually, she's so disgusted by my selfishness (because the jewelry and all of the dinners and countless other movies and shit that I've paid for don't COUNT) that she locks herself in my bathroom and calls her cousin to come get her, only he doesn't answer. I tell her to unlock the door, because in her state I don't trust her (hey, I've got toothbrushes and medication that could be tainted). She refuses, so I tell her I have to take a huge dump (which was true). So she comes out and in the state I'm in, I forget about the shit (I wanted to keep my eye on her). She realizes I don't have to go to the bathroom so she runs back in. I was quick enough to get over and hold the doorknob so she can't lock it and she flips out calling me all sorts of names. I ask her in a calm and rational voice to please just open the door and I won't bother her, but she won't. So I try pushing it open and she's pushing back. Now she's like 110 pounds and I'm 190. You do the math. I start to push and she starts crying like I'm coming in to beat her to death, which is the farthest thing from my mind. Eventually she gives in and lets me in. We sit there in silence and finally I say, "please just let me take you home so I can get on with my life." She agrees. As she is walking out I realize she has my thick wool socks on (I love those damn things). I ask for my socks back, I'll even give her another pair to wear home, I just want those. She tells me, "Go to ****ing hell you selfish piece of shit," while flipping me off right in my face. Finally I had to be loud, and I said, "**** you, you crazy asshole!" (Yes I am a very patient person and it takes a lot to get me to yell or call people names). She went on, in great shock that I could even think that she was crazy, to call me every name she could think of with the word, "****" in heavy rotation. I took her home, not a word was said.

All of this is the truth. I haven't spoken to her since, and I don't want to. I'm already working on my next ex.

She flips out over ice cream? What the hell?

Welcome to my world. the effing planets must be in some kind of psycho bitch alignment...rep

[Bob Dole]

Originally Posted by DJay23

Wow, how appropriate this thread popped up. I've got a fresh one, happened Sunday night.

So I've been seeing this girl since the beginning of December. We'd had a few ups and downs, but after every issue cropped up, things seemed to be better afterward and we seemed to be moving forward quite well.

So Sunday night, I was in a crabby mood. Just one of those things. So she's at my place and we're settling in to watch a movie. She decides she wants some ice cream. I have a new carton of Turkey Hill Peanut Butter Cup (which is more like chocolate ice cream with huge bricks of peanut butter in). So we're scooping this stuff out, and she starts picking all of the big pieces of peanut butter out of the carton. I made a face like, "what the ****?" Finally she says, "what?" I say, "If I wanted chocolate ice cream, I would have bought chocolate ice cream." With this I give in and say, "I'm in a really bad mood, I can't do this tonight, I'm gonna take you home." So she absolutely LOSES it.

You left out the part where you had sex just before the ice cream incident.

[B2chiefsfan]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

Cute?

c.....u.......n.......t..............

[DJay23]

Originally Posted by mike_b_284

Welcome to my world. the effing planets must be in some kind of psycho bitch alignment...rep

Thanks buddy.

Feels good to be free though. Sorry yours won't give up though, that's rough.

[DJay23]

Originally Posted by Bob Dole

You left out the part where you had sex just before the ice cream incident.

Funny you should mention that. When we were getting off the couch to get the ice cream I said, "I could go for some sex right now." As it turns out she had just put some kind of yeast infection cream in her cooter so I was out of luck. Had we had sex, I would have been in a better mood, and I'd probably still be unknowingly waiting for that bomb to go off.

[Katipan]

Originally Posted by Baby Lee

Let the record reflect that I made the initial post, and expressed my regret over the visceral reaction I have developed. I take no responsibility for the subsequent direction this discussion takes.

You're a terrible Endo2.0, babe.