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Old 10-18-2018, 08:04 AM  
rico rico is offline
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A Funny Thread About Chiefsplanet on Patsfans.com Forum

So the Pats fans from the patsfans.com forum have a somewhat lengthy thread about their observations of Chiefsplanet and it is funny as hell reading how they perceive CP. It is a thread titled, "Some Light ChiefsPlanet Reading for this Fine Monday Morning" and it consists 8 pages of them generally discuss how mortified they are by us inbred Midwesterners.

https://www.patsfans.com/new-england...rning.1145743/


I've probably spent 10X as much time reading forums of other teams this year, for a lot of what I have come across has actually been funny/entertaining for me to read compared to previous years. I don't know if it's the Mahomes excitement or what, but other forums have been more pleasant for me to read than usual. Stuff like reading the Bears forum melting down when Mahomes burst on the scene and Trubisky was struggling because they were upset that they selected Trubisky instead of Mahomes in the 2017 draft. Seeing the same Alexsexuals that infested our board, infesting the Extreme Skins Redskins forum and thinking to myself, "holy shit...this is for real. There literally is a cult following for Alex Smith who follow him from team to team and obsess over and make Alexcuses for him on forums of whatever team he currently plays for. I still can't believe these people exist." I mean, part of me during the entire Alex era thought those Alexsexuals were all trolls who were simply just trolling us the entire time...like they couldn't possibly be for real. Holy shit they are real...they are very, very real... and it's funny watching another fanbase get stuck with them and be forced to interact with them. Reading the exchanges between our very own Sandy Vagina (as Sandy Monk) on Extreme Skins going on his strange Alex-obsessive rants and proceed to talk to these guys on that forum about how his posting (and survival) on CP during the Alex era basically made him the equivalent of a Holocaust survivor due to all of the extreme abuse he endured here...that was inadvertent comedy gold. I've visited the Mange a few times to see if they have finally started giving us some ****ing respect or if they are at least, shook up about what appears to be a promising long term future for the Chiefs...most of them are still the same old hatin' Donk fans, in denial.


And now this... a discussion about our very own planet...ChiefsPlanet being discussed and observed by a bunch of smug and prissy Bostonians as if we are some sort of display at a zoo. Some pretty funny stuff.


A couple observations:


- To start, Billay has become a running joke there and it is funny as hell to me. Some of them are genuinely creeped out by him. They know him as his current username, "Titty Meat" and it is hilarious to them that there is a Chiefs fan who they assume is an inbred Midwesterner that goes by the self-applied name of "Titty Meat" and acts like, well Billay...a poster that I personally think is funny as hell and don't think CP would quite be the place it is without him. Also, wasn't "Titty Meat" a name that a mod gave him and/or changed his name to as a joke? It's funny that when they read his posts, they probably imagine some fat hill-rod with a mullet and a jackolantern mouth sporting a cutoff shirt and a dirty hat, with a big dip oozing out of his mouth with his butt crack bursting out for the entire world to see... and he is screaming, "**** you piece of shit trash ass mother ****er I hope you get blown up at the next Boston Marathon. **** Boston **** The Patriots and **** New England fans!" That's our Billay!!! He is a hot topic there!!!


- They don't find some of the humor/inside jokes here to be funny and basically think we are a group of crazy, roadkill eating, armadillo ****ers. It's like a culture shock for them to read the musings of what they consider to be the smelly armpit of the country. Comments like:


"What is hot molten lava cum?!?!?"

"Fans like that -- no matter whom they root for -- creep me the hell out."

"Pretty sure that guy is inbred."

"A thread started by 'Titty Meat.' Chiefs Planet appears to be comprised of 14 year old kids."

"I've noticed that ChiefsPlanet posters are much more unhinged compared to the average NFL fanbase, and also more openly bigoted. The Philly forum is up there as well."

"That Chiefs forum reeks of backed up trailer park septic tanks and meth."

"On the whole, I've found kc fans to be a chill down to earth bunch irl." (HE SEEMS NICE).

"I thought this idiot was a 15 y/o pimple face punk but look at his stats. Member since 2002 and closing in on 200,000 posts. Must be lonely out there in the midwest!" (2 pages in and they are already hatin' on Clay! )

"Chiefs fans deserve no success. Their fanbase is one of the most vile groups I've ever seen right up there with the Iggles, Jest, and Donkeys." (Well, at least they acknowledge that Donk fans are generally vile, but it sucks to be lumped together with them).

"The whole western side of Missouri is inbred. I was at that 2014 massacre at arrowhead, those fans are absolute scum." (I was at that game as well with hometeam and mac459...we encountered a few Pats fans there and were mutually respectful to each other. Everyone we were around seemed to be the same way. I didn't witness one instance of Chiefs fans being dicks to any of them. Shenanigans must have been taking place wherever we weren't at. Either that, or this priss couldn't take the noise!)

"Other than a funny picture thread their #1 off-topic discussion is 9/11 conspiracy theories. If you want to dig around an online armpit that's a hell of every unfair stereotypes about white people made 100% true and given dial-up internet, then ChiefsPlanet is your buffet."

"It really is impressive how many light years beyond the other NFL boards this one is."

(Regarding the last two quotes...first one is 100% untrue. CP has plenty of interesting topics consisting of posts written by some of the most intelligent and witty posters I've ever encountered on any forum. After reading some of their threads the past few days, they all seem to have this "understanding" amongst each other that they are the "smartest" and "most superior" fanbase...and I don't understand how they have come to that conclusion. They aren't a dumb bunch by any means and it is interesting to read the opinions/takes of the Pats by these guys who don't have their hater-glasses on since every other fan of every other team in the NFL hates them...I mean, these guys know their Pats stuff...beyond Brady, Bellichik and Gronk and it's weird to read actual Patriots discussion that includes every one of their players and aren't littered with the stereotypical "**** Brady/**** Bellichik/etc." stuff that you read everywhere else...they know their team, for sure, but from what I've read, these fans don't stick out as being smarter or intellectually superior to any other team's forum that I've come across, especially CP. Ok, so they don't casually state that they want someone to die in an AIDS fire or drink antifreeze...however, none of their takes are by any means groundbreaking. Just an average, very ordinary, kind of arrogant, somewhat prissy group of fans of a winning team who have decent takes on topics, but nothing to write home about. They seem to have an inabiity to grasp humor that is rooted in any sort of intentional absurdity...the intentional absurdity that is a driving force here. They aren't as bad as those Redskins fans on Extreme Skins, though... holy shit, those guys are ban-happy to any user that makes an attempt at not be a boring robot. Most of the Alexsexuals are already banned from that forum! )


Anyways, I'll post a few more of my favorite quotes from that thread. It's funny to read other forums discuss CP... CP is a pretty unhinged group.
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Old 10-18-2018, 11:08 PM   #211
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Oh shit! I remember you! Your the dude who posted one of the best rants I’ve seen in months and Sauto was like, “I’m liking this guy more and more” and I responded with a Holy shit did I miss the mark! Definite misunderstanding!!! I wonder who in the hell I mixed you up with. Did one of the Pats trolls’ names start with a “D?”
There was a few of them.. Think they all have small "d"s though
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Old 10-19-2018, 01:12 AM   #212
rico rico is offline
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This dolphin rape is making me miss Sorter. If there is anything that will bring my boy Sorter back, it’s dolphin rape. No seriously...the most fun I think I ever saw the dude having at CP was a stretch where he, SNR and I went on a frenzy where we created a ton of dolphin rape memes for like a week and ’d

Last time I talked to him, he was gonna do me a solid and help set my youngest brother (graduated last year...the 2018 All Hawkeye athlete of the year) up with a wrestling workout with a couple Mizzou wrestling coaches that he knew. Plans didn’t go through for my brother decided to commit to play football instead just a couple days later. I dont recall hearing from him since then, but Sorter is cool shit.

Sorter ARE YOU OUT THERE?!?!?? WE HAVE DOLPHIN RAPE!!!! THESE DIRTY RAPIST DOLPHINS ARE CALLING FOR YOU!!!

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Look, I dress like a 50 year old lesbian.


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My 2017 Adopt a Chief: KAREEM HUNT!!!!!!!
My 2018 Adopt a Chief: DORIAN O'DANIEL!!!!
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Old 10-19-2018, 02:51 AM   #213
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tl;dr

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rausch View Post
Look, I dress like a 50 year old lesbian.


My 2016 Adopt a Chief: NICK FOLES!!!!!!!!!
My 2017 Adopt a Chief: KAREEM HUNT!!!!!!!
My 2018 Adopt a Chief: DORIAN O'DANIEL!!!!
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rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.rico is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 10-19-2018, 06:15 AM   #214
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is online now
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those ****s are going to really hate us when we cum on their faces in January

then they will just turn into Broncos fans

"but muh lombardeez!"
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Old 10-19-2018, 07:24 AM   #215
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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I feel a little bad about last night. We're not supposed to bully people, especially those with special needs.

They have to call their team the Pats, because most of the fan base can't say the letter R. My 7 year old talked like a Patriots fan and I sent him to speech therapy.


Also. Marky Mark sucks.
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Old 10-19-2018, 08:33 AM   #216
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Chiefs Planet.

Come for the Chiefs talk.

Stay for the dolphin rape cave.
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Old 10-19-2018, 08:36 AM   #217
MahiMike MahiMike is offline
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I used to date Pats fan's mom.

She was an interesting and talented lady.

My favorite part was on rainy nights, she would turn a lamp on, set it on the floor and turn off all of the other lights as she removed her pants and ease in front of the light so I could muse at her womanly shape. Seductively, she would reach down and grab herself by the meat flaps and twist them into the most amazing shadow puppet show.

It was always impressive as she smooshed it into a turkey neck and I swear....could make a gobble sound from her south mouth. the donkey, the dolphin and the circling buzzard were also pleasing.
Maybe she worked at that strip club in Boston I went to.
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Old 10-19-2018, 08:38 AM   #218
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Old 10-19-2018, 08:40 AM   #219
MahiMike MahiMike is offline
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At the time I was dating Pats Fan mom, I had a friend who was blind.

One night I wanted to do something nice for him, so I had Ms. Patsfan mom turn on some music. As we danced I placed a blindfold on her face and laid her down on the sofa bed. I worked the combination on her panty lock and off they came. I slowly began press down on the mattress between her hairy toed feet, but I stepped back, and led my friend, the Ronnie Milsap-American into my place. He eased up, spit on his index finger and pushed it into her 2 chute clear to the top knuckle.

Suddenly, he recoiled, pulled away and sat back onto a chair. Oblivious that his finger looked like he had been tarring a roof, he reached for and gulped a glass of lukewarm water he found on the coffee table. He was pale as a sheet and looked like he was going to be ill.

He said "you know I'm blind right"
"sure man" I retorted.
"you know I can read braille"
"I assumed"

"well....when I put my finger in there, the polyps read "Tom Brady has no soul".
Gold!
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Old 10-19-2018, 08:42 AM   #220
MahiMike MahiMike is offline
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Originally Posted by Iowanian View Post
I feel a little bad about last night. We're not supposed to bully people, especially those with special needs.

They have to call their team the Pats, because most of the fan base can't say the letter R. My 7 year old talked like a Patriots fan and I sent him to speech therapy.


Also. Marky Mark sucks.
Say hello to your ma aight?
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Old 10-19-2018, 09:55 AM   #221
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those ****s are going to really hate us when we cum on their faces in January

then they will just turn into Broncos fans

"but muh lombardeez!"
They're going to wish their mother swallowed them...with her loose, hairy, asshole
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Old 10-19-2018, 09:56 AM   #222
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Old 10-19-2018, 09:56 AM   #223
dwwataz dwwataz is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Iowanian View Post
I feel a little bad about last night. We're not supposed to bully people, especially those with special needs.

They have to call their team the Pats, because most of the fan base can't say the letter R. My 7 year old talked like a Patriots fan and I sent him to speech therapy.


Also. Marky Mark sucks.
I forgot about the R thing..

What a bunch of wetodds.
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Old 10-19-2018, 10:34 AM   #224
BDj23 BDj23 is offline
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Old 10-19-2018, 10:37 AM
rico
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Old 10-19-2018, 10:41 AM   #225
rico rico is offline
ON CP YOU’RE SOMEBODY’S BITCH!
 
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Oops biffed that one!
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tl;dr

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rausch View Post
Look, I dress like a 50 year old lesbian.


My 2016 Adopt a Chief: NICK FOLES!!!!!!!!!
My 2017 Adopt a Chief: KAREEM HUNT!!!!!!!
My 2018 Adopt a Chief: DORIAN O'DANIEL!!!!
Posts: 12,548
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