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Old 05-19-2014, 11:46 AM  
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
**** you, asshole
 
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I'm on a mission to shit

Five days ago I had surgery.

On the first day I did not shit. This did not surprise me, as I had not eaten since lunchtime the day before.

On the second day I did not shit. This did not surprise me, as the doctors informed me that I may experience constipation.

On the third day, I did not shit. I became concerned. I began eating apples, taking a stool softener, and enjoyed a large bowl of indian beans.

On the fourth day, I did not shit. My bowels began to feel...too full. I drank two large glasses of Metamucil and two tablespoons of milk of magnesia.

It is the fifth day, and I have not shat, though farts are coming profusely and with great force. I took two tablets of Senokot (recommended by my doctor) and downed a large bowl of Kellog's Fiber Plus about an hour ago.

I'm on a mission. To shit.

Please, God. Let me shit.
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Old 05-19-2014, 04:45 PM   #151
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
**** you, asshole
 
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USUL HAS CALLED A BIG ONE

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Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 04:47 PM   #152
booger booger is offline
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Man up a push that sucker out sugar tits!
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booger is too fat/Omaha.booger is too fat/Omaha.booger is too fat/Omaha.booger is too fat/Omaha.booger is too fat/Omaha.booger is too fat/Omaha.booger is too fat/Omaha.booger is too fat/Omaha.booger is too fat/Omaha.booger is too fat/Omaha.booger is too fat/Omaha.
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Old 05-19-2014, 04:48 PM   #153
OnTheWarpath15 OnTheWarpath15 is offline
HIS TURN
 
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I'm not sure why I keep checking this thread - I'm genuinely concerned I'm going to scroll down and see a pic of a bowl so full it's drydocked.
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OnTheWarpath15 is obviously part of the inner Circle.OnTheWarpath15 is obviously part of the inner Circle.OnTheWarpath15 is obviously part of the inner Circle.OnTheWarpath15 is obviously part of the inner Circle.OnTheWarpath15 is obviously part of the inner Circle.OnTheWarpath15 is obviously part of the inner Circle.OnTheWarpath15 is obviously part of the inner Circle.OnTheWarpath15 is obviously part of the inner Circle.OnTheWarpath15 is obviously part of the inner Circle.OnTheWarpath15 is obviously part of the inner Circle.OnTheWarpath15 is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 04:50 PM   #154
Rams Fan Rams Fan is offline
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Do you have a large collection of magazines to read while thy almighty shit is passed?
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Rams Fan is too fat/Omaha.Rams Fan is too fat/Omaha.Rams Fan is too fat/Omaha.Rams Fan is too fat/Omaha.Rams Fan is too fat/Omaha.Rams Fan is too fat/Omaha.Rams Fan is too fat/Omaha.Rams Fan is too fat/Omaha.Rams Fan is too fat/Omaha.Rams Fan is too fat/Omaha.Rams Fan is too fat/Omaha.
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Old 05-19-2014, 04:50 PM   #155
bevischief bevischief is offline
....
 
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VARSITY
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Originally Posted by Count Zarth View Post
USUL HAS CALLED A BIG ONE

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Old 05-19-2014, 04:55 PM   #156
Pasta Giant Meatball Pasta Giant Meatball is offline
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A midget came out of his arse!!!
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Pasta Giant Meatball is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Giant Meatball is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Giant Meatball is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Giant Meatball is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Giant Meatball is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Giant Meatball is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Giant Meatball is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Giant Meatball is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Giant Meatball is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Giant Meatball is obviously part of the inner Circle.Pasta Giant Meatball is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 05:00 PM   #157
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
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nope, just a spice dream
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Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 05:00 PM   #158
Holladay Holladay is offline
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I wouldn't want to be around when he blows/pops. I would suggest to go to a public restroom. It's gonna sound like you dropped a watermelon in the toilet. Also, you don't have to clean up the mess
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Old 05-19-2014, 05:01 PM   #159
RealSNR RealSNR is offline
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Miralax
Yep
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Old 05-19-2014, 05:06 PM   #160
RealSNR RealSNR is offline
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RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 05:07 PM   #161
htismaqe htismaqe is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SNR View Post
Yep
No!

Miralax might make it worse. At the very least, it takes 2-3 days to work.

Never fear though, he drank an entire bottle of magnesium citrate. This will all be over shortly.
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Old 05-19-2014, 05:08 PM   #162
booger booger is offline
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That thing is really gonna stretch your star fish
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booger is too fat/Omaha.booger is too fat/Omaha.booger is too fat/Omaha.booger is too fat/Omaha.booger is too fat/Omaha.booger is too fat/Omaha.booger is too fat/Omaha.booger is too fat/Omaha.booger is too fat/Omaha.booger is too fat/Omaha.booger is too fat/Omaha.
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Old 05-19-2014, 05:11 PM   #163
Chief Pote Chief Pote is offline
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I call bullshit. I had to drink a gallon of that lemony shit, 30 minutes tops and you're shitting your pants.
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Old 05-19-2014, 05:13 PM   #164
htismaqe htismaqe is offline
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I call bullshit. I had to drink a gallon of that lemony shit, 30 minutes tops and you're shitting your pants.
It could take up to 2 hours.
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Old 05-19-2014, 05:15 PM   #165
SAUTO SAUTO is offline
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Originally Posted by htismaqe View Post
No!

Miralax might make it worse. At the very least, it takes 2-3 days to work.

Never fear though, he drank an entire bottle of magnesium citrate. This will all be over shortly.
My daughter takes miralax and shits very soon afterward.


It works or her like a champ
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