Misc Hey Hootie!! I need some relationship advice! - Page 5

Saccopoo · 06-25-2015, 07:53 PM

Hoots, I'm going to lay out a situation. Tell me what you'd do.

It's been about 2.5 years since I've been laid. Basically because I don't care. Animals screw. It's just a base physical act that tends to complicate things in general. And I know. I've been laid plenty prior.

However, this past week, some of my co-workers and myself went out for some drinks to blow off some steam after a brutal couple of weeks and I proceeded to get pretty freaking drunk. Subsequently, I was told my no less than three girls that night that they had crushes on me. Probably something you don't want to tell a guy who hasn't been laid in two and a half years who's been drinking hard for four hours. Anyway, I now have naked pictures on my phone of four women (aged 19, 23, 38, 47) and I kinda made out that night with another one who is best friends with the 38 year old who is dating one of my good friends. (Who has subsequently asked me if I wanted to take her swimming while her boyfriend was at work.)

Also, I might or might not have had sex with the 23 year old in the back seat of a guys car who was the designated driver that night while he was driving us home.

So, what would you do in such a situation? I ask you because I'm looking for some solid, objective advice versus some horrible moralistic bullshit that I know I'm going to get from some of the other dudes around here. And it sounds like a situation you would have put yourself in at one time or another. Help me out bro.

Dayze · 06-27-2015, 08:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stop, Chiefs

Titty Meat · 06-27-2015, 08:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hootie 2.0

You think I use condoms?

Saccopoo · 07-01-2015, 08:30 PM

Hey Hootie - what's the best way to shut down the hot streak?

It's getting a little out of hand.

I just had one of the gay guys at work hand me his phone number yesterday. I'm not really gay, so it's not going to do me any good and it's getting a little weird.

Any help would be appreciated.

Titty Meat · 07-01-2015, 08:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Saccopoo

Hey Hootie - what's the best way to shut down the hot streak?

It's getting a little out of hand.

I just had one of the gay guys at work hand me his phone number yesterday. I'm not really gay, so it's not going to do me any good and it's getting a little weird.

Any help would be appreciated.

Just get your dick sucked dude. A mouth is a mouth.

Hootie · 07-01-2015, 08:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Billay

Just get your dick sucked dude. A mouth is a mouth.

This.

**J Diddy** · 07-01-2015, 09:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Saccopoo

Hey Hootie - what's the best way to shut down the hot streak?

It's getting a little out of hand.

I just had one of the gay guys at work hand me his phone number yesterday. I'm not really gay, so it's not going to do me any good and it's getting a little weird.

Any help would be appreciated.

You sure you want to wait another 2.5 years just because the current mouth that desires your penis has hairy lips?

Take one for the team!!!! VIVA LA STREAK!

**Bufkin** · 07-01-2015, 09:21 PM

Did you show these bad bitches some of your mock drafts and online scouting reports?

**J Diddy** · 07-01-2015, 09:25 PM

You know how I get my women?

I show them a pic of my 11 inch cock. I mean, sure, it's hard to photograph the ****ing chicken because it's so quick but I manage. Most the women I show it to know their way around a kitchen.

BigCatDaddy · 07-01-2015, 09:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bufkin

Did you show these bad bitches some of your mock drafts and online scouting reports?

" Well ladies, let me take you to a little place I call Draft Planet"

Saccopoo · 07-01-2015, 09:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bufkin

Did you show these bad bitches some of your mock drafts and online scouting reports?

No Bufkin, I typically don't associate my on-line personae with my job personae. It's hard enough being a Prince of the Universe without throwing out draft theory to festering dickfaced noobs. (Trust me, I know.)

However, oddly enough, one of the women was apparently impressed by some inane ramblings I mused upon that night regarding Russell Wilson and the Seattle Seahawks after I found that she was a fan of that team. She took offense that I called him an average dude with no upside greater than he's achieved right now and will most likely see a large decline in his overall production due to the modern age of free agency and salary cap, yadda, yadda, yadda. Something about a modern equivalent to Terry Bradshaw without the size advantage and a three year window for success...

Apparently that gets you an argument and then boob pics just minutes later that she took while in the ladies room.

Nightfyre · 07-02-2015, 08:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Saccopoo

Hey Hootie - what's the best way to shut down the hot streak?

It's getting a little out of hand.

I just had one of the gay guys at work hand me his phone number yesterday. I'm not really gay, so it's not going to do me any good and it's getting a little weird.

Any help would be appreciated.

Are you saying you are just sort of gay? NTTAWWT

**RealSNR** · 07-02-2015, 09:11 AM

Next time you're going through one of your cold streaks, just masturbate in a Chuck E. Cheese bathroom. I hear it's just as good as the real thing.

06-25-2015, 07:53 PM
Saccopoo Kindness in words... Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Zion Casino cash: $10025483	Hey Hootie!! I need some relationship advice! Hoots, I'm going to lay out a situation. Tell me what you'd do. It's been about 2.5 years since I've been laid. Basically because I don't care. Animals screw. It's just a base physical act that tends to complicate things in general. And I know. I've been laid plenty prior. However, this past week, some of my co-workers and myself went out for some drinks to blow off some steam after a brutal couple of weeks and I proceeded to get pretty freaking drunk. Subsequently, I was told my no less than three girls that night that they had crushes on me. Probably something you don't want to tell a guy who hasn't been laid in two and a half years who's been drinking hard for four hours. Anyway, I now have naked pictures on my phone of four women (aged 19, 23, 38, 47) and I kinda made out that night with another one who is best friends with the 38 year old who is dating one of my good friends. (Who has subsequently asked me if I wanted to take her swimming while her boyfriend was at work.) Also, I might or might not have had sex with the 23 year old in the back seat of a guys car who was the designated driver that night while he was driving us home. So, what would you do in such a situation? I ask you because I'm looking for some solid, objective advice versus some horrible moralistic bullshit that I know I'm going to get from some of the other dudes around here. And it sounds like a situation you would have put yourself in at one time or another. Help me out bro.
Posts: 15,450

07-01-2015, 08:30 PM	#63
Saccopoo Kindness in words... Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Zion Casino cash: $10025483	Hey Hootie - what's the best way to shut down the hot streak? It's getting a little out of hand. I just had one of the gay guys at work hand me his phone number yesterday. I'm not really gay, so it's not going to do me any good and it's getting a little weird. Any help would be appreciated.
Posts: 15,450

07-01-2015, 09:25 PM	#68
J Diddy Don't Be A Dick Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Joplin Casino cash: $6957192	You know how I get my women? I show them a pic of my 11 inch cock. I mean, sure, it's hard to photograph the ****ing chicken because it's so quick but I manage. Most the women I show it to know their way around a kitchen.
Posts: 33,636