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Reload this Page Life Just hooked up with an Aussie chick. (My cool story, bros.)
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Old 05-20-2012, 02:34 AM  
Dante84 Dante84 is offline
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Just hooked up with an Aussie chick. (My cool story, bros.)
an' she tolked loike this!

'ello! Moi name's Jane. Oi'me in Austin for the weekend as Oi travel through the stoites.

We were in Vegas yestah-day, and we will be going to New Orleans Mohn-day noight.

Moi friend ova they-ah is mackin' out with some bloke she met. I reckon we should do the same.

(She was probably a 6/10. Blonde, moderately skinny, decent face. But the accent sent me from six to midnight faster than a woman ever had before. Her friend was super skinny, with a Megan Fox face. The other guy lucked out hard.)

Anywho, they were staying at a Travel Lodge and we grabbed a cab with her, her friend, and this random other guy. We went back to their room, and me and this random guy just sat there awkwardly while the girls went in the bathroom. I said, "Man. Aussie chicks are so hot." He said, "Dude, I know." Then we giggled like little school girls. His chick came out in t-shirt and thong, and my chick just left the door cracked asked me to come "help her with something."

An hour later, I went to the lobby, hopped in a cab, and came back home. After some non-answered phone calls to my amigos, I hopped on CP to share my tale.

I love this city, I love Australia, I love blowjobs, and I love Chiefsplanet.

G'noight!
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Old 05-20-2012, 02:56 PM   #46
Dante84 Dante84 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cornstock View Post
Not saying this was the case, but have you considered the possibility that you may have been duped by a convincing Aussie accent? I wouldn't put it past an intelligent six to improve her stock by playing that up. I've played off the Aussie accent straight up Barney Stinson style. It was legen...wait for it...dary!
Since women are inherently not funny, she would have failed hard had she been trying to pull a fast one. And I quizzed her on the limited bit of Aussie knowledge I had. And then I also remembered that a girl wanted to make out with me, so I stopped caring.

Hell I would have gone with it if she were pretending, anyways.
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Old 05-20-2012, 02:58 PM   #47
Dante84 Dante84 is offline
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Originally Posted by PostRockPablo View Post
Spit or swallow?
Open mouth, four inches away. She did the handy work.

My hands were in the air like I was on the Mamba at Worlds of Fun.
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Old 05-20-2012, 03:05 PM   #48
WV WV is offline
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So did you get to see her nude or just get the ol knob bobbed?
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Old 05-20-2012, 03:13 PM   #49
Dante84 Dante84 is offline
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So did you get to see her nude or just get the ol knob bobbed?
Got her down to her britches.
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Old 05-20-2012, 04:12 PM   #50
stevieray stevieray is online now
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cool story, bro.

did you use "that's not a knoife, THIS is a knoife?"
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Old 05-20-2012, 06:26 PM   #51
boogblaster boogblaster is offline
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kool .....
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boogblaster 's adopt a chief was Sabby Piscitelliboogblaster 's adopt a chief was Sabby Piscitelliboogblaster 's adopt a chief was Sabby Piscitelliboogblaster 's adopt a chief was Sabby Piscitelliboogblaster 's adopt a chief was Sabby Piscitelliboogblaster 's adopt a chief was Sabby Piscitelliboogblaster 's adopt a chief was Sabby Piscitelliboogblaster 's adopt a chief was Sabby Piscitelliboogblaster 's adopt a chief was Sabby Piscitelliboogblaster 's adopt a chief was Sabby Piscitelliboogblaster 's adopt a chief was Sabby Piscitelli
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Old 05-20-2012, 06:43 PM   #52
CrazyHorse CrazyHorse is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante84 View Post
an' she tolked loike this!

'ello! Moi name's Jane. Oi'me in Austin for the weekend as Oi travel through the stoites.

We were in Vegas yestah-day, and we will be going to New Orleans Mohn-day noight.

Moi friend ova they-ah is mackin' out with some bloke she met. I reckon we should do the same.

(She was probably a 6/10. Blonde, moderately skinny, decent face. But the accent sent me from six to midnight faster than a woman ever had before. Her friend was super skinny, with a Megan Fox face. The other guy lucked out hard.)

Anywho, they were staying at a Travel Lodge and we grabbed a cab with her, her friend, and this random other guy. We went back to their room, and me and this random guy just sat there awkwardly while the girls went in the bathroom. I said, "Man. Aussie chicks are so hot." He said, "Dude, I know." Then we giggled like little school girls. His chick came out in t-shirt and thong, and my chick just left the door cracked asked me to come "help her with something."

An hour later, I went to the lobby, hopped in a cab, and came back home. After some non-answered phone calls to my amigos, I hopped on CP to share my tale.

I love this city, I love Australia, I love blowjobs, and I love Chiefsplanet.

G'noight!
Getting a blowjob from a tranny in Austrailia? Almost makes you a little homophobic eh?
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CrazyHorse has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.CrazyHorse has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.CrazyHorse has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.CrazyHorse has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.CrazyHorse has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.CrazyHorse has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.CrazyHorse has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.CrazyHorse has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.CrazyHorse has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.CrazyHorse has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.CrazyHorse has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.
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Old 05-20-2012, 07:58 PM   #53
Dragonocho Dragonocho is offline
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You just laughed and gave her a Vegemite sandwich? Is that what you did? OMG!!!!
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Dragonocho has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.Dragonocho has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.Dragonocho has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.Dragonocho has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.Dragonocho has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.Dragonocho has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.Dragonocho has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.Dragonocho has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.Dragonocho has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.Dragonocho has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.Dragonocho has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.
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Old 05-20-2012, 08:01 PM   #54
Thig Lyfe Thig Lyfe is offline
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Maybe a dingo sucked your dick.
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Old 05-20-2012, 10:02 PM   #55
Setsuna Setsuna is offline
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I thought Australia hated outsiders.....at least that what I heard. You can't try to move there for shit. They won't take you. Damn isolationists.
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Setsuna threw an interception on a screen pass.Setsuna threw an interception on a screen pass.Setsuna threw an interception on a screen pass.Setsuna threw an interception on a screen pass.Setsuna threw an interception on a screen pass.Setsuna threw an interception on a screen pass.Setsuna threw an interception on a screen pass.Setsuna threw an interception on a screen pass.Setsuna threw an interception on a screen pass.Setsuna threw an interception on a screen pass.Setsuna threw an interception on a screen pass.
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Old 05-20-2012, 10:50 PM   #56
Groves Groves is offline
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Here's what we know: You giggled with some random dude at a Travel Lodge.
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Old 05-20-2012, 11:32 PM   #57
Titty Meat Titty Meat is offline
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Dante you still doin work for Nightlife KC?
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Old 05-21-2012, 02:05 AM   #58
BryanBusby BryanBusby is offline
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Originally Posted by Trevo_410 View Post
OI CROIKEH!!!

GET THOSE CROIKADILLUHPIGS AWAY FROM SNOOP!!

OIOOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIO

(women's national team)
yo what da **** is snoop doin down under
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Old 05-21-2012, 02:24 AM   #59
KurtCobain KurtCobain is offline
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Originally Posted by BryanBusby View Post
yo I want to snoop down under on kurtcobain and give him the best handjob ever
Wow, thanks! I guess
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Old 05-21-2012, 06:16 AM
Dante84
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Old 05-21-2012, 10:52 AM   #60
Setsuna Setsuna is offline
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Originally Posted by KurtCobain View Post
Wow, thanks! I guess
Hey Kurt you want me to do your wife too or just your mom?

Oh and Dante....I think that's pathetic you make a thread about this, if/when I lose my virginity you won't see me making a thread about it. Get bent!
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