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Old 01-15-2013, 04:13 PM  
gblowfish gblowfish is offline
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This Week's Important Florida News!

Two Boffo Stories:

Story One: Man arrested for giving wicked wedgies, or snuggies, or melvyns, or whatever you call pulling the underwear over a nerd's head.

Story Two: Fifty Year Old School Teacher Gets Tanked on Cheap Wine, wrecks her van, offers to blow the cop if he lets her go.

Florida, I love you. You're just so fun!

Story #1:
Charles Ross is known for orchestrating outrageous pranks and posting them to Youtube. But this time, the 18-year-old prankster may have gone a step too far.

Ross was arrested for battery Sunday night after he allegedly gave a series of wedgies to moviegoers outside the Carmike Royal Palm 20 in Bradenton, Fla., while a friend filmed the prank, the Bradenton Herald reports.

The underwear prank, which Gawker calls a "wedgie spree," ended badly for Ross when a 20-year-old male victim reported to authorities that Ross grabbed him "by the back of his pants and pulled them up hard," according to the Smoking Gun. Although other victims of the schoolyard prank also came forward, the 20-year-old is the only one seeking charges.

On his Youtube channel, Ross has uploaded video footage of him performing a variety of pranks -- from doing handstands over people to trying out pick-up lines -- but the latest in his compilation is by far one of his most hands-on public displays.

According to the police report obtained by the Smoking Gun, Ross challenged the male victim following the wedgie, "asking if he wanted to hit him."

The Mantee County Sheriff's Office arrested Ross and detained him overnight. He was released on $750 bail, records show, and his court date is set for Feb. 14.

Though Ross' wedgie spree was meant in jest, this is not the first time someone has been arrested for doling out the uncomfortable underwear gag. In 2006, an Albany, N.Y., teacher was arrested for endangering the welfare of a child after allegedly giving a 10-year-old student a wedgie during summer school.

http://www.manateesheriff.com/Public...px?ID=10125392

Story #2:
'A' for effort?
Middle school math teacher Mary Maloney allegedly offered oral sex to a police officer after being nabbed for a hit-and-run in Palm Beach County, Fla.

Maloney, 53, was arrested Sunday after she crashed her van into a pickup truck around 8:35 p.m., then took off, according to an arrest report obtained by the Sun Sentinel. A witness to the crash tracked Maloney's car to a parking spot and then called police.

The arresting officer said he found an empty gallon jug of wine behind Maloney's driver's seat and "immediately smelled the strong odor of an alcoholic beverage emitting from her person," according to WPTV. The report states that her eyes were glassy, bloodshot, and partially closed.
The officer that drove Maloney to the police station noted that she asked him "How much do I need to pay you to just let me go? Don't you understand I am a school teacher?"

She then allegedly offered to perform oral sex on him and allow him to fondle her breasts.

Maloney was charged with driving under the influence, leaving the scene of a crash with damage, resisting an officer without violence, driving with a suspended license and attempted bribery of a public servant.
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Old 06-17-2015, 04:43 PM   #436
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Someone lock my parents up for life:

http://insider.foxnews.com/2015/06/1...ard-90-minutes
And they say kids don't play outside like they used to. No shit, parents would be arrested everywhere!!
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Old 06-17-2015, 08:11 PM   #437
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They could arrest half my block, the other half don't have kids.
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Old 06-18-2015, 09:58 AM   #438
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MIMS, Fla. — Police say a man who was checking to see if a bullet was still in the chamber of a pistol has died after he put the gun to his head and pulled the trigger, accidentally shooting himself.

Authorities say 49-year-old Charles Cooper shot himself at 1:50 a.m. Sunday during a weekend fishing trip and a cookout in Mims.

Police say Cooper had been drinking beer. At one point during the gathering, he retrieved a handgun.

Cooper's friends told investigators that after he removed the magazine from the gun, he asked if there was still a round in the chamber.

Cooper then raised the gun to his head and pulled the trigger, discharging a round.

He was pronounced dead at the scene.

Read more here: http://www.bradenton.com/2015/06/15/...#storylink=cpy
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Old 08-16-2015, 10:45 AM   #439
scho63 scho63 is offline
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South Florida couple accused of turning teen into sex slave

Sick bastards!

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2015/08/13...nto-sex-slave/

A South Florida couple allegedly turned a teen into their sex slave and sealed her off from the outside world for more than five years, police said.

Rob Johnson, 44, and his wife, Marie Johnson, 43, of Port. St. Lucie, were arrested on Tuesday and charged with felony sexual assault.

The Port St. Lucie Police Department said the girl was sent to live with the Johnsons at age 13 after her mother died, and was told she could only be part of their family if she agreed to have sex with them. She was told to call Rob Johnson “master,” investigators said in an arrest affidavit, and Marie Johnson pushed her against a wall and held her by her throat until she agreed to the sexual demands.

The girl, who isn’t identified in police filings, was beaten when she didn’t follow the couple’s directions or complete her chores. The girl said the abuse continued for more than five years. All the while, Rob Johnson held Sunday school classes for his family at their home, invoking Old Testament passages to justify the actions, according to the arrest affidavit.

The girl, now 21, was homeschooled, not allowed to use the phone and forced to rehearse what to say to doctors if she was asked about sexual activity, according to police.

The girl eventually was able to leave the home after her grandmother purchased a plane ticket to bring her to Ohio, the police said.

The Johnsons were freed on bail later Tuesday, the St. Lucie County Sheriff's Office said, after each posted $60,000 bond. No attorney was listed for them.

Port St. Lucie is on Florida's Atlantic coast, about 115 miles north of Miami.



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Old 08-16-2015, 02:56 PM   #440
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Quote:
Originally Posted by scho63 View Post
South Florida couple accused of turning teen into sex slave

Sick bastards!

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2015/08/13...nto-sex-slave/

A South Florida couple allegedly turned a teen into their sex slave and sealed her off from the outside world for more than five years, police said.

Rob Johnson, 44, and his wife, Marie Johnson, 43, of Port. St. Lucie, were arrested on Tuesday and charged with felony sexual assault.

The Port St. Lucie Police Department said the girl was sent to live with the Johnsons at age 13 after her mother died, and was told she could only be part of their family if she agreed to have sex with them. She was told to call Rob Johnson “master,” investigators said in an arrest affidavit, and Marie Johnson pushed her against a wall and held her by her throat until she agreed to the sexual demands.

The girl, who isn’t identified in police filings, was beaten when she didn’t follow the couple’s directions or complete her chores. The girl said the abuse continued for more than five years. All the while, Rob Johnson held Sunday school classes for his family at their home, invoking Old Testament passages to justify the actions, according to the arrest affidavit.

The girl, now 21, was homeschooled, not allowed to use the phone and forced to rehearse what to say to doctors if she was asked about sexual activity, according to police.

The girl eventually was able to leave the home after her grandmother purchased a plane ticket to bring her to Ohio, the police said.

The Johnsons were freed on bail later Tuesday, the St. Lucie County Sheriff's Office said, after each posted $60,000 bond. No attorney was listed for them.

Port St. Lucie is on Florida's Atlantic coast, about 115 miles north of Miami.



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Old 08-17-2015, 06:39 AM   #441
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Driver Crashes Car, Tells Police To Arrest Her Dog

http://news.yahoo.com/driver-crashes...074721049.html

----------------------------------
A woman who crashed her car into an apartment building tried to shift the blame onto her pet dog, telling police she wanted the animal arrested.

Christina Anne Marie Lamoreaux got out of her car when she hit the complex in Florida and fled the scene, heading back to her home.

Unfortunately for the 33-year-old, she was seen by witnesses who told the police what they had seen.

Officers who arrived at her apartment admitted to driving into the building but insisted her dog was to blame.

Lamoreaux then told them that the dog should be arrested instead of her, adding that she only drove away because she was always going to pay for the damage.

Police didn’t buy her story and arrested Lamoreaux, who apparently smelled of alcohol and appeared “confused”.

She refused to take a sobriety test, and was duly arrested, according to Daily Commercial.

Lamoreaux was charged with DUI and resisting arrest.

It is not clear what her pet dog was supposed to have done to have caused the crash.

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Old 08-17-2015, 06:52 AM   #442
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Originally Posted by Coochie liquor View Post
And they say kids don't play outside like they used to. No shit, parents would be arrested everywhere!!
The neighbors need to be punched in the face. If your so concerned about the child's welfare, do the neighborly thing and invite the child in your house until the parents arrive.

I just moved into a townhouse. First thing I did? Introduced myself to the neighbors, and gave them my phone number should they see something with my kids, or I see something with theirs.

Self-policing is non-existent these days, and it's truly sad.
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Old 08-27-2015, 08:02 PM   #443
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Man tries to drive SUV off flatbed tow truck

http://kstp.com/article/stories/S389...html?cat=12157
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Old 08-29-2015, 05:08 AM   #444
Coochie liquor Coochie liquor is offline
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http://www.nbc-2.com/story/29893142/...sievers-murder

Wow, this is just ****ing crazy. I know Wayne Wright, he's married to a very good friend of mine. He was down here jus after the murder happened. It's very difficult to believe. I'm sure there's something to it since he's being charged with second degree murder. The Doctors husband is like his brother. I know his wife must be going crazy right now. I can't wrap my hea around this yet. Just ****ing WOW!!
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Old 08-29-2015, 06:41 AM   #445
Al Bundy Al Bundy is offline
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Man tries to drive SUV off flatbed tow truck

http://kstp.com/article/stories/S389...html?cat=12157
How ****ing stupid do you have to be...
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Old 08-29-2015, 06:42 AM   #446
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How ****ing stupid do you have to be...
Getting your car towed is where you start.
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Old 08-29-2015, 08:10 AM   #447
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Hey baby....

Story Two: Fifty Year Old School Teacher Gets Tanked on Cheap Wine, wrecks her van, offers to blow the cop if he lets her go.

Holy hell, no.

"Lemme gum on ya with this face and breff that reeks of cheap wine and Liggett Light 100s..."
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