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Old 02-12-2013, 02:02 PM  
Cave Johnson Cave Johnson is offline
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Pussy Control Issues

After a good long dating career, I may have had my last piece of strange. Met a girl at a SB party who's a solid 8.5 (minimum), younger, fun, educated, good job, same values, etc. She's on a 6 month lease, which creates some implications for moving in down the road.

The problem is her cat, pictured below. It was an ill advised gift from an ex (who I'd now like to kick in the balls). Apparently he's destructive, neurotic, eats uncontrollably, and emphatically does not like my dog. This is not my dog's fault, who's pretty mellow and enjoys licking/humping cats. She's attached to it and feels guilty for leaving said cat alone. Which is the natural and empathetic reaction of a well-adjusted person, but it cuts into certain activities and is generally problematic.

So, any advice you can give on dog/cat acclimation or dealing with a psycho cat in general (other than antifreeze) would be very much appreciated.

Last edited by Cave Johnson; 02-13-2013 at 10:39 AM..
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Old 02-12-2013, 02:38 PM   #31
King_Chief_Fan King_Chief_Fan is offline
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it's you or the cat.......let her decide.

If she doesn't decide now, you will find out later down the road and it might be you she kicks to the curb...best to know now.

or

You stick that cat in the suitcase that is in the picture and you send it "packing"
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Old 02-12-2013, 02:41 PM   #32
Cave Johnson Cave Johnson is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ptlyon View Post
I'm calling it right now, TV!
TV?
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Old 02-12-2013, 02:43 PM   #33
morphius morphius is offline
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You could also try the water gun technique on the cat, or train the dog to stay away from the cat. Understand that cats like attention on their terms, Dogs want attention. Cats will generally leave a situation they don't like, so make sure he can get away.
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Old 02-12-2013, 02:43 PM   #34
Dave Lane Dave Lane is offline
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I bet I know whats on the back side of your noggin!
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Old 02-12-2013, 02:44 PM   #35
Dave Lane Dave Lane is offline
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You're aware of the distinction between met and had, right?
There is one? News to me.
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Old 02-12-2013, 02:44 PM   #36
houstonwhodat houstonwhodat is offline
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Old 02-12-2013, 02:50 PM   #37
ptlyon ptlyon is offline
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TV?
A tranny Caved his Johnson! A tranny Caved his Johnson!
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Old 02-12-2013, 02:51 PM   #38
Cave Johnson Cave Johnson is offline
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Originally Posted by tooge View Post
teach your dog this trick.
That looks like my dog, but he lacks the intellectual horsepower to pull that plan off.
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Old 02-12-2013, 02:52 PM   #39
Chief_For_Life58 Chief_For_Life58 is offline
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put leather gloves on..grab it by the neck throw it in a box...drive out of the city...open the box, have your 12 gauge loaded with buck shot, shoot twice just to be sure
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Old 02-12-2013, 02:54 PM   #40
lcarus lcarus is offline
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God damn guys. How many times do I have to give out this amazing advice?!



+



=

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Old 02-12-2013, 02:55 PM   #41
Scrawny Armed Alex Smith Scrawny Armed Alex Smith is offline
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Sounds like she wont come over to **** bc she doesnt want to leave the cat alone at home.

Go to her house and ****? Make the cat watch. Flip it the bird while ****ing. Accidently finish on the cats face and call it good.
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Old 02-12-2013, 03:03 PM   #42
Cave Johnson Cave Johnson is offline
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Originally Posted by DaKCMan AP View Post
Pics or GTFO.
I know an 8.5 sounds impossible, but for those of us that aren't self-aggrandizing engineers, it's quite possible.
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Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.Cave Johnson is too fat/Omaha.
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Old 02-12-2013, 03:17 PM   #43
Nickel D Nickel D is offline
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Will give it a shot.
Now THAT's the idea!! Nighty-night, fat cat!
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Old 02-12-2013, 03:25 PM   #44
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Pics of said 8.5?
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Originally Posted by DaKCMan AP View Post
Pics or GTFO.
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I know an 8.5 sounds impossible, but for those of us that aren't self-aggrandizing engineers, it's quite possible.

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Old 02-12-2013, 03:26 PM   #45
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Buy the cat a t-shirt to wear that is not overly tight but not too loose either. This is GUARANTEED to calm the cat down as soon as it is put on. Cats do not like the restraint and it will calm it down and make it less aggressive. This is also good to make them sleep all through the night.

Also, as a bonus, it gives you an excuse to buy her and the cat something simple and she will probably love buying clothes for it.
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