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View Poll Results: Who would win in a fight to the death between Simply Red and Zach?
Zach 7 14.00%
Simply Red 32 64.00%
They kill each other 11 22.00%
Voters: 50. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 12-08-2012, 09:16 PM  
Branden Albert's Huge Balls Branden Albert's Huge Balls is offline
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH
 
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Who would win in a fight to the death between Simply Red and Zach?
The setting:

Small, enclosed arena with no exits. Enough room to maneuver, but not quite enough room for someone just to run away from their opponent.

The weapons:

Each contestant is armed with a heavy rubber mallet and a small flask of hydrochloric acid.





The rules:

There are no rules.

A small crowd of CP spectators watches through mirrored windows.
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Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.
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Old 12-08-2012, 09:33 PM   #31
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$500.
Just materials, or labor + materials?
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Old 12-08-2012, 09:34 PM   #32
Shogun Shogun is offline
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Old 12-08-2012, 09:34 PM   #33
KCUnited KCUnited is offline
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Soccer in the face, Red.
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Old 12-08-2012, 09:35 PM   #34
SNR SNR is offline
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In an arena that small, it becomes more about quickness and being able to quickly dodge frequent attacks from that mallet.

Simply Red has Zach beat on this. I think the hydrochloric acid is worthless, unless Zach were able to squash Simply Red on the floor and force him to drink it.

I will take Simply Red
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Old 12-08-2012, 09:35 PM   #35
Lumpy Lumpy is offline
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This is about bloodsport.
Shit. Why didn't you just say so in the OP?
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Old 12-08-2012, 09:37 PM   #36
SNR SNR is offline
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People are forgetting that this is a heavy rubber mallet.

One decent blow to the head is all it takes to at least knock the other guy out.
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Old 12-08-2012, 09:38 PM   #37
Shogun Shogun is offline
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Also, what is the weather like? Is it storming?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CHENZ A! View Post
I'm just saying there's all sorts of shit i could be doing! I could watch a movie, play a video game, rub one out, read a book, learn a foreign language, etc.. But i'm still watching the assholes because i love them, and I hate myself
- On watching the Royals.



CHRIS GETZ HITTING FOR MOAR POWER!
Posts: 9,255
Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.
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Old 12-08-2012, 09:39 PM   #38
SNR SNR is offline
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Also, what is the weather like? Is it storming?
Yes. It's a dark and stormy night.
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Old 12-08-2012, 09:40 PM   #39
DaFace DaFace is offline
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I'm gonna go with Zach. While I like SR most of the time, Zach could probably insult him in such a way that he'd run away and refuse to come back (then show back up a month or two later).
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Old 12-08-2012, 09:40 PM   #40
lewdog lewdog is offline
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Is a bathroom break involved? If not, I could definitely see piss and feces becoming a large part in this fight.
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Old 12-08-2012, 09:40 PM   #41
Lumpy Lumpy is offline
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Lumpy is obviously part of the inner Circle.Lumpy is obviously part of the inner Circle.Lumpy is obviously part of the inner Circle.Lumpy is obviously part of the inner Circle.Lumpy is obviously part of the inner Circle.Lumpy is obviously part of the inner Circle.Lumpy is obviously part of the inner Circle.Lumpy is obviously part of the inner Circle.Lumpy is obviously part of the inner Circle.Lumpy is obviously part of the inner Circle.Lumpy is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 12-08-2012, 09:40 PM   #42
Branden Albert's Huge Balls Branden Albert's Huge Balls is offline
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What about the roof? What is the shape of it? Is it supported well?
The roof is a thin mesh so that birds don't crap on competitors and some degree of stench can still escape.


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Just materials, or labor + materials?
The labor was Phobia's gift to The Chiefsplanetiseum.


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What kind of nails used to construct this room? This is key.
No nails. Phobia used industrial strength wood glue only.
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Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Branden Albert's Huge Balls has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.
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Old 12-08-2012, 09:42 PM   #43
threebag02 threebag02 is offline
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Zoccer is jacking of to his own soccer talk while giving himself an acid enema. SR can't survive the close confines and kills himself with blunt force trauma. As he falls the the ground Zoccer blows snot on SR and yells G-G-G-G-O-A-L!!!!!!!!!
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Old 12-08-2012, 09:44 PM   #44
Shogun Shogun is offline
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No nails. Phobia used industrial strength wood glue only.
My god

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I'm just saying there's all sorts of shit i could be doing! I could watch a movie, play a video game, rub one out, read a book, learn a foreign language, etc.. But i'm still watching the assholes because i love them, and I hate myself
- On watching the Royals.



CHRIS GETZ HITTING FOR MOAR POWER!
Posts: 9,255
Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.Shogun has an IQ even higher than Frankie's.
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Old 12-08-2012, 09:45 PM   #45
Iowanian Iowanian is offline
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Zach reminds me of Peta from the Hunger games book.


Does he have a chic with him that can shoot a bow in the middle of a back flip and take a testicle off of a field mouse at 150 yardss?
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