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Airports are the worst. Water invariably shoots right up my ass and my sphincter closes like a time lock at the bank. All I can think about is what is laying eggs inside me during the flight home.
"Well, Donger, you seem to be infected by a Peruvian Anal Slug! You didn't actually take a shit at the airport, did you?
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I think the young people enjoy it when I "get down," verbally, don't you?
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