Quote:
Originally Posted by patteeu
It doesn't seem very useful to me. In fact, it sounds like he tells her that both actively trying to make it happen and passively waiting for it to happen are the wrong choices, but then he goes on to suggest passively waiting for it to happen. I guess that maybe he's saying be passive but put finding someone completely out of her mind, but to me that seems almost impossible to do without just giving up like he did.
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That's actually not what I said.
My advice, actually, is that she should get out more, meet more people, and stop getting stuck on the idea of having to land some specific guy (whether that means a particular person she has in mind at the time, or a specific archetype that she thinks is "right" for her). I think it's a pattern of behavior that sets her up for failure from the start and that might be causing a lot of stress in her life. I think it might be beneficial for her to try and break it. Other that that, I think she should just have fun, live her life, try to stop stressing so much about this, and be open to whatever or whoever crosses her path. And most importantly to stop overthinking/overanalyzing herself and her relationship situation. I would guess she's causing herself a lot of stress, which isn't good for her own health, and is probably something that other people can pick up on when they meet her. When I say she needs to relax and just live her life, that's what I'm referring to.
Aside from that, she should probably be cautious about getting comfortable too quickly, as well.
And yes, I am admittedly a funny source for advice on this subject. And I think I've hit my quota on relationship discussion for the first quarter of 2013.