[blaise]

Originally Posted by CosmicPal

How the ***** did this book get a movie deal?

You know what though- ladies and gentlemen of the planet- THIS SHOULD BE YOUR INSPIRATION. If there was ever a classless rambling lying piece of shit ever penned and published- it is this book. And now that someone, quite possibly drugged and tied to a chair by midget hookers and given blowjobs until he was blue in the face so that he would agree to produce and sell the rights to a movie deal- this ought to tell every clueless slacker out there in this great world of ours that opportunities, as rare as they may seem, truly do exist.

If you have an idea, a story, a painting, a song, a handbasket you weaved, or anything of any intrinsic creative value sitting around with nothing to do- I can assure you it is worth far more than this dribbling pile of crapola from Tucker Fake. That fumbling Bic marker drawing you did of the horsie in the meadow should be hanging in the Metropolitan Museum of Art now that this book was ever published and made into a movie. That piano recital you did when you were sick as a dog in heat would have made Bach weep for joy compared to this book now turned movie.

There you have it folks, we are now all artists. Splat your hand down on the piece of paper, trace your fingers, and give us your turkey- 'cause that hapless drawing is a work of art that deserves to be displayed in the Nelson-Atkins Museum of Art. This book in no way deserved to be published, and it sure as shit on my heels didn't need to be made into a movie.

I now shall retreat to my den, where I will doodle my masterpiece with crayons.

I agree.