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Old 12-13-2012, 05:55 PM   #3
Rausch Rausch is offline
Mindful Taoist German
 
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Join Date: Aug 2000
Casino cash: $8081662
Quote:
Originally Posted by KurtCobain
My mom is a former abused teen parent/turned good mom/turned lesbian crackhead/turned straight methhead/turned prisoner/turned recovered lonely addict who loves god and life and is very sweet and nice now.

She is a stupid ho. The kind that breaks into her kid's apartment, cleans it, and charges him 50 dollars.

Her long time boyfriend finally just got some decent time in the slammer and she's given up. So she's just great now. No mo ho. But she's lonely. And she's 49. I told her once she hits fifty, she's going to probably be alone forever, so she's freaking out about that.

Anybody want to bang her? Let me know.

How the **** does this not make top 5, easy?...
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Quote:
"He had no teeth, and he was slobbering all over himself. I'm thinking, 'You can have your money back, just get me out of here. Let me go be an accountant." I can't tell you how badly I wanted out of there."
Denver rookie QB John Elway, on Jack Lambert, after Lambert and the Steelers knocked Elway out of his first game as a pro (1983).
Quote:
Originally Posted by rico
I wish I always ended up at gay bars.
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