Quote:
Originally Posted by gblowfish
Hi Folks, Jeff Briggs, Olathe Dodge Chrysler Jeep at I-35 and 119th Street. It's Spring, and I've got a lot full of Ram Tough Trucks, Work Trucks, Crew Cabs, Cummins Diesels and a whole lot more. And I've got more Jeep Wranglers than I can swing a dead rat at….so here's the deal. You come in for a test drive today….yes TODAY…and my wife will give you a handie -with her right hand- on the show room floor. Plus get free oil changes for one year. Buy a new Ram Truck, and my daughter will blow your entire family. That's right everyone from Great Grandpa down to little Opie in middle school. And I'll throw in a spray in bed liner, and my wife will give you a SECOND handie -with her left hand- at no extra charge. Folks, I want your trade. I don't care if the car has no engine. I don't care if it has no doors or a windshield, I don't care if there's a dead Mexican in the trunk. I want your trade. So come in and take advantage of me. Seriously. Take advantage of me. You can jam a ball gag down my throat, bend me across my desk and shove a stapler up my ass, and then post pictures on You Tube. I will do ANYTHING to sell you a new Dodge, Chrysler or Jeep vehicle. And this weekend, for Easter I'll be strapped to a giant Cross on the roof of my dealership. Test drive a new Chrysler 300, and you can throw rocks at me. That's right, I said it, test drive a Chrysler 300 and you can stone me on the roof of my dealership. All my prices are out the door. We'll see you on the showroom floor, come get a handie from my wife, a hummer from my daughter, just come in... that's Olathe Dodge Chrysler Jeep!
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I swear on my Grandpa that sounds JUST like a place i used to work at, the salesmen would come up with nearly identical jokes about it... the gm would get on the roof like you're saying and have all kinds of stupid commercials and promotions.
So come on in for your chance to meet UFC champion Matt Hughes! and with any tests drive you can take a stab at my wife! we've got her spread eagle in the back of the parts truck! Ol Matts taking a shot as we speak, and boy i tell ya folks, they call him the champ for a reason!