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Originally Posted by 4th and Long

A young blond woman in Kansas City, Missouri was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the Missouri River. She went down to the river and was about to leap into the frigid water, when a handsome young man saw her tottering on the edge of the bridge, crying.

He took pity on her and said, "Look, you have so much to live for. I'm a sailor, and will be leaving off to Europe in the morning, and if you like, I can stow you away on my ship. I'll take good care of you and bring you food every day." Moving closer, he slipped his arm round her shoulder and added, "I'll keep you happy, and you'll keep me happy." The girl nodded yes. After all, what did she have to lose? Perhaps a fresh start in Europe would give her life new meaning.

That night, the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a lifeboat. From then on, every night he brought her three sandwiches and a piece of fruit, and they made passionate love until dawn.

Three weeks later, during a routine inspection, she was discovered by the captain. "What are you doing here?" the captain asked. "I have an arrangement with one of your sailors," she explained. "I get food and a trip to Europe, and he's screwing me."

"He certainly is." the captain said. "This is Harrah's Casino and we never leave North Kansas City."