The ****ening has begun! Eric Metcalf gets through a crack at the line and is gone. I'm already scared of him.
Meanwhile, the Browns defense is destroying my OL. I have absolutely no running room, and no time to throw.
Fortunately for me, my defense is playing quite well at the moment. Saftey blitz!
Offense, un**** thyself.
See? All I need is just a second after my drop is done. That's all I need. Plz, O-line. PLZ.
The Browns respond with a drive and only need a half yard to score. But I have TED WASHINGTON.
SPLAT. That was awesome. Fortunately, I am a complete ****ing moron.
That's Everson Walls picking Joe Montana. IRL he was retired, and that's one of the things I love about this roster. Still, an incredibly stupid throw. The defends holds CLE to 3, though.
Oh, Christ. I am a turnover machine. The defense holds CLE to 3. They are playing amazing. Then the Browns do the dumbest thing I've ever seen: play a Cover 3 and press the corners with 4 seconds left in the half, ahead 16-7.
Yes, that's a touchdown every time with Joe, sorry. Two-point game at halftime despite my blunders. Let's GO. I get the kickoff.
BIG HURDLE by Keith Cash, who leads the 1994 Chiefs in receptions. This leads to a one-yard TD dive by Marcus Allen. I've got the lead!
Marquez Pope pounds Michael Jackson and forces a glorious fumble. Another great trade executed by LTGIMPS, Carl Peterson. I seem to be on track for a win now, provided I avoid turnovers, but I punt, and the Browns get a field goal.
Down 22-20 with 2:38 left, I do something really dumb.
Yeah, just a total brain fart of an INT. All I needed was a FG and I've ****ed this up. The Browns line up for a FG that will force me to get a TD to win.
AND THEY SHANK IT. I start at the 41 with plenty of time and again, all I need is a field goal. I've got this.
MONTANA MAGIC! The Chiefs are going to win this game.
Ahhhh, Dale Carter with the game-ending pick. Now all I need to do is run this clock out.
OH CHRIST. WHAT THE ****. **** ME.
OH GOD. WHY DID I PLAY COVER 3!?!?
And just like that, I waste a 310 yard, 4-TD game from Montana.
Metcalf ****s me for 161 yards on 25 carries.
Owned.
