[Eleazar]

Jameis Winston threw 18 picks last year. Imagine sitting in a war room and saying to yourself, “Well, he threw 18 picks last year in an abominable conference. And he derped all over the Rose Bowl. And he stole crab legs. And he got suspended for doing the Tosh Serenade at the school cafeteria. And every other NFL fan will root for him to fail. And he may have raped a woman. And he couldn’t even show his face at the ****ing draft because he knew he’d be booed for possibly raping a woman. LET’S TAKE HIM FIRST.”

The most amazing thing is that the Bucs, like every authoritative body at FSU, were covering for Jameis even BEFORE they were stupid enough to draft him. They had to lay an intricate groundwork of rose-colored bullshit:

“To me, I think he’s told us an awful lot with how he’s handled it,” Smith said. “It’s not like he’s getting ready to go into the NFL and scrutiny is coming his way.”

Yes! In that way, I’m GLAD he was accused of rape! Really steels you for the rigors of pro football. If only EVERY prospect were accused of rape. It’s the Oklahoma Drill of legal entanglements. TOUGHENS THE BODY AND THE MIND.

Of course, now that the Bucs have procured Winston, they’re taking it one step further by trying to change the narrative and paint him as some kind of mutant football savant. He’s a sponge! He studies a lot! They aren’t using training wheels! His football IQ is wayyyy higher than his criminal IQ! Essentially, they’re telling you that his football output will be so good that you will have no choice but to put the rest of Jameis’ baggage out of your mind. Not only is this cynical—even craven—but it could also all be a pack of lies. Let’s see that gif one more time…



That’s against Oregon, mind you. Oregon doesn’t even play defense. Don’t try to sell me on this lumbering turnover machine before I’ve seen his fat ass play a single down. **** you for openly trying to polish that turd in front of America.

You can't talk about JaJamis that way!


http://deadspin.com/why-your-team-su...ers-1718991122