Airports are the worst. Water invariably shoots right up my ass and my sphincter closes like a time lock at the bank. All I can think about is what is laying eggs inside me during the flight home.

"Well, Donger, you seem to be infected by a Peruvian Anal Slug! You didn't actually take a shit at the airport, did you?

I don't seem to have a problem at work. I'm even kind enough to give my boss an estimated time that is needed for the facilities to air-out after I use them.

Him: "Did you outgas?"

Me: "20 minutes"

Him: /doesn't use bathroom for 20 minutes

Thats one thing I love about graveyard shift. I get the whole damn bathroom to myself.

Alex Smith is a proud feminist and all of you will be on the bandwagon soon enough

I'm not shy about the pooping but if a solitary environment is available, I'll take it. My last job was in an eight floor older building. We used 2 of them regularly. That meant every unused floor had a private pooping heaven to which one could adjourn if he so desired. Except for 6. Don't use 6. That bathroom looked like someone had been murdered in it.

Not sure about ladies, but at my job, nobody is shy about pooping.