It's a simple formula really.

Post Count + (Time Here - Time Spent Trolling)
Real Life Annual Income - Lies Told

Sofa King needs to pay off all of my debts and my family's debts with his annual income now!

God ****ing damn it. It ****ing refuses to rain. SON OF A BITCH.

frickin' flatheads must be on nest .. no frickin' fish on me lines .. frick frick frick .....

Put your special sauce on the bait boog and you'll have more fish than you know what to do with!

Sometimes I am a stupid ****ing dumbass that does really ****ing stupid ass things.

Ooooh I hate people who been deliver bad news worth a smile. Worthless ****s.

People that don't like being reminded of their age but then get upset if you forget their birthday.

asset tags suck, especially when some show up missing during an audit.

I really wish I had a punching bag right now. Just a lot of pent up frustration. I need to go off, and punching and kicking the shit out of a bag would help.

A bags nice, but punching a screaming toddler is always a good release.

I just realized the classes I have been taking through MCC don't count for dick towards a Bachelors degree. I feel like choking something.

people who walk around the office with bluetooth headsets, or on a cell phone; pacing, wandering, and talking loud. irritating.

Hey smokers, you need to realize that world is not your effin ashtray. If you smoke keep your butts in your own effin car and throw them out when you get to the closest trashcan. Don't thow them out while driving or while at a stoplight.

Attorney calls to schedule a mediation at our office:

Attorney: I'd like to schedule a mediation for such-and-such date at such-and-such time
Me: Alright, what's the case name? (All I need is the case name and the attorneys involved)
Attorney: Uhhh...Hold on just a minute.... (under his breath) What did I do with that file?

HOLDING

Attorney: Can I call you back?


OR

Anyone: Can I get so-and-so's email address?
Me: Sure. It's...
Anyone: Oh, hold on just a minute. I need to get a paper and pen.


REALLY???

**** the month long pink uniform bullshit. One week is enough! It's a good cause... I guess... However, breast cancer gets more money than any other cancer and it is one of the most curable types. Why not make it about all cancer? Oh yeah, it's because people aren't sympathetic to tabacco users.

**** BREAST CANCER AWARENESS MONTH!!!!

ok my company does not want us to have individual printers in our office, so most of us use a common printer. For one thing they are always being used, another thing is they are a combination of a printer, fax machine, copier ect. The problem is the damn thing is always being used, or gets overwhelmed and breaks. I went to 6 rooms with these cluster****s of a machine before I finially found one that was working and not being used. Much better problem to have then not having a job at all, as they are trying to cut costs this way instead of cutting jobs, but still a ****ing irritation.

**** pregnant women. They are ****ing miserable and they want you to be miserable. It is ****ed up. Bitch, I didn't knock you up!

this really irrates me. When I ask smokers why they do this they say "it is nasty and it smells up my car"....

what?

Meh I dump my bong water at red lights all the time

that really does stink up your car. And I figure its good for the environment, riiiight??

I just discovered somebody keyed my car over the past couple days. I don't know if it happened at Arrowhead, or one of the little neighborhood hoodlums did it. But it's completely down the driver's side. Shit man, the car has 210K on it and the barely runs. The body was the only thing that was still in decent condition. What drives people to do dickhead stunts like that? That's one of the most chicken shit things a person can do.

I'll give you 10 reasons/Fat Scott

I just moved out of my apartment and had topay 450 ****ing dollars to move out because of things like micrwave cleaning then my wallet got stolen, a friend of mines brother killed himself, Upgraded myphone and the stupid ****er deleted all my contacts, got a ticket for expired tags cuz the ****ing state didnt send me a renewal i work 45 hours a week go to school full time (15 hours) have 0 time to go to the tag office so i just got ticketed $220 for expired tags, come home and my pup chewed up half my ****ing carpet ****

The good news is that you can fix most of this.

First off you dnt have time for a dog,let alone owning one. The rest of your story. Meh

got him before i decided to go back to school but yes i agree i do not

I trusted a good friend to pay me back for breaking a lease. 4 months later and he hasn't paid more than a quarter of it back and hasn't tried to pay me back since September.

But he does have money to get wasted at bars and go to restaurants that require reservations with women who aren't his girlfriend.

So now I have to figure out where to move whilst finish up school work in the next 24 hours.

I guess I deserve trusting a shitty person and that means I'm doubly as shitty a person.

LMAO

That about sums it up.

If you trusted RaiderRoomate you have no one to blame but yourself.

Never trust anyone, even good friends, with anything money related.

I know, I am wise beyond my years.

Hey lewdog, can you float me a C-note until Christmas? I promise I'll pay you back.

Oh for sure Bug. You seem like a decent guy. I will get that out tomorrow!

I have paypal, you can hook me up now!

Ok cool! My paypal account username is frEmoney4y'all.

Aaaaaaaand today I learned people actually take note of my posts.

Sweet! I'm going to go watch my email and I'll let you know when it comes in.

You're well on your way to the Inner Circle.

Dear, unethical **** bag that wasted my time today,

It was my pleasure busting my ass on getting you an estimate and preparing your rush order for production! No, seriously! It's not like I had any other orders to complete! Thanks for taking your business elsewhere! I hope they realize their error in pricing and charge you out-the-ass!

Oh, and good luck with the zombie apocalypse tomorrow, you cum-dumpster!

:cuss:

a guy that sits very near me at work, has his cell phone volume on; and each time he gets a text/email, it says "Captain...Incoming Message" in a Darth Vader-like voice.

all
****ing
day

Take it from him and give it to me. I need to break something! :#

**** this ****ing snow and ****ing ice and ****ing cold and **** winter and why do I ****ing live here.

Don't you bitch whenever it's hot, too? :p

Anyone else seeing the ghost shift?

I ****ing hate the fact i was banned from starting threads. I may be a little off but i dont post crap like some people do and yet i'm the bad guy in this **** that shit. I gonna say stop the hate. Let me post a thread please.

Next summer when it's 100° and I'm bitching about the heat, remind how much I hate this bullshit.

reported.

Damn, I thought I was the only pissed off person today. LMAO

Btw, I just finished shoveling snow and now my back is killing me. Yes, I was SHOVELING. We own a damn corner lot, yet we don't own a snowblower.

WTF sense does that make? None. :banghead:

How much snow did you get?

It sounds like you need a tractor.

Buy a snowblower?

I don't own one either. I have too damn many other machines to store and maintain, I don't want another one around that I only really need 2-3 times a year.

Around 6-8" here. It's hard to really tell when it's drifted all to hell, and the first couple inches were basically slush that instantly froze once the snow above it was removed. 'Twas a nasty one this time.

**** this storm. It cancelled my good friends flight which stopped the entire trip.

Why couldn't that just wait a week or at least until tonight. ****ed up all kinds of plans

WTF else do you have to take care of? Mower, Weedeater.....Hedge Trimmers?

Last year my buddy bought one. I stacked the shit on him because it NEVER snows much here. If it does it is light and shitty and won't work well for a snowblower.

Then it promptly snowed 18 inches of heavy ass snow. I'd have been ass****ed without it. It probably paid for itself between my driveway, his driveway, my grandma's, and his grandmas. If we wouldn't have had it, I would have had to go get the tractor and a loader and it would have been horrible.

It's worth it. Even if you just used it once.

Yeah, we had massive wind here too. I bet it was blowing 60. We only got an inch, and the slushy stuff I was excited about because it stuck in the fields and didn't blow away.

A tractor would be nice.

We got 5-6 inches, maybe? The problem is it rained before it snowed yesterday. Then, of course, the sun was out earlier today and I couldn't get to shovel until the sun was down. There was a lovely sheet of ice on top of the snow.

So, there I was... busting the shit out of the ice and snow. All of this after dealing w/ the ignorant slutmonger client. Oh, and I wanted to fill up the tank in the Jeep, (ya know, prepare it for ramming zombies, and such), and the damn pumps were slow as all hell. I stood there for 5 minutes and only got $8 worth of gas.

This has not been a pleasant day. :mad:

I've thought about just buying a new one every fall, and selling it every spring. Even if I took a $100 hit on it, it would still be worth it.

And I have a regular mower, lawn tractor, weed eater, blower, chain saw, power washer, and three freaking vehicles. That's enough gas powered machines.

Well, shit. So much for my plan on making you feel bad for me and offering to clear our sidewalks/driveway when the next snow hits. :)

One of the reasons why we don't own one is because every POS snowblower that we did have didn't last long. Of course, they were used, hand-me-downs from my FIL. Need I say more? LMAO I also can't see spending hundreds of dollars on one when, (like you said), we only see this crap a few times.

Yeah that's a factor too, they all turn into pieces of crap after 3-4 years. A lot end up with fuel system issues from sitting around unused most of the time. That was the other reason I was thinking about the new one every year, I know the damn thing would work when I needed it to.

Smartass. LMAO

I'm just here to solve your problems.

In that case, I'll send you a list. :)

That gives me an idea, I could go buy a new snowblower now, and sell it to Lumpy in March. BOTH PROBLEMS SOLVED.

Wanna trade? We've got way more than that, and that doesn't even count the diesel motors, which we have way more of.

Grandpa had a Deere unit from the late 70s/early 80s. It was a snow eating beast and ran like a champ. And grandpa never screwed with fuel even though we rarely used it. It was sold in the estate auction in 2008, and dad missed it. He was pissed.

Anyway, if you get one that isn't a cheap POS, I think it will stay as long as you want.

:hmmm: That's just crazy enough to potato.

Yeah well you have a farm, that's a little different. My uncle has so much shit on his farm I have no idea how he keeps it all running. Guess it helps that he's retired.

It's just hard to justify a snowblower, it's not uncommon for us to have winters where you don't even need one.

We have far fewer winters that need it than you do. I think my buddies' paid for itself last year.

Well I'll say this much...they're worth their weight in gold when you need one.

Does the company that makes your lawn tractor make a snow thrower for it? That's what I have - a snow thrower for the front of my Cub Cadet lawn tractor. That way, you don't have to deal with another machine or fuel issues (just belts, if it's like mine).

Let nut have the keys to the car. Can't be any worse than Dr Johnny Fever threads.

Time to renew our insurance at work. There are three of us on a group plan. Come to find out, an individual policy for me would cost $300 less (over 50%) per month than they're paying for me on the group plan. One of the attorneys on it could save $900 per month if he goes to an individual plan. The other attorney on it has a wife that has diabetes, and that's what's driving up the cost of our group plan. Of course, he'll be slightly screwed monetarily if we all were to go to individual plans. He's fighting tooth and nail for us to stay on a group plan for one more year, since his wife's pre-existing condition won't matter after the first of the year due to new legislation. In that amount of time, I could personally save approximately $1500 during that time.

They're in there right now trying to hash things out to decide if we want to go to the individual plans. On top of the savings on just my portion, my new plan would include dental and vision. I could very easily decide to go to this individual policy regardless of what they decide. Doing so, however, would mean that they all would since there would no longer be three people on the group plan. Without three people, we can't have a group plan. Are they asking me my opinion on this? No, of course not. It's still an option, though. Do I go with the individual plan regardless, even if it means possibly pissing off one of my bosses?

I guess this is in the rant thread because listening to them talk about it right now is because I'm frustrated. I'm sorry you're losing the $2500 you've already paid to your HSA, but losing $2500 probably doesn't affect you nearly as much as making $1500 more affects me. ASK ME WHAT I THINK!

You have to do what's best for you. And I don't know your financial situation, but $100+ a month is a lot of money for many. But realistically, how much do you like your job? You're likely going to paint a target on your back by the one attorney.

I would talk to them about it. They may further subsidize your plan.

This.

Lay the numbers out in front of them. Inform them of the savings that you're looking at....but you're willing to see what they can do to help you and still keep you on the group plan.

The same agent is working with all of us on individual plans. They know how much they pay for mine, and that they would be saving on what they pay on mine. I pay anything over $400 per month. They would each save half on what they pay for their portion of my insurance, plus I would no longer have to pay anything.

Argggh...this whole car buying bullshit is driving me ****ing nuts. I emailed a guy four ****ing days ago about a car that's exactly what I ****ing want, and still no reply and his ****ing ad is still up. Do you want to sell the goddamned thing or not?

Then I call another guy about another vehicle today that I'd like to look at, and he tells me to call back tomorrow after noon because he has someone coming to look at it in the morning. What the hell ever happened to first come, first served? Plus if the other idiot doesn't show up or buy it he could potentially miss a sale because he put me off. ****ing stupidity across the goddamn board.

I'm sitting here with fistful of ****ing cash and no one wants it.

I hate yuppie bitches.

So I'm driving the truck down the highway with the sprayer on the back. Sprayer has 10' wide wheel stance so it's a wide load. Anyway, the highway is a 2 lane with a short shoulder. If I put one side on the yellow the other side will be right on the white, so I'm using the whole lane. So 3/4 of a mile out of town a cop has a pickup pulled over. They are mostly in the ditch, no big deal. Well there is oncoming traffic, so I slow down, hit the hole in traffic and swing wide to give the cop plenty of room.

So right after I get around the cop, this ****ing assbag in a bitch ass minivan freaks out and passes the car behind me and me in my big ass truck. There is a pickup oncoming that has to slow down for this douche-mobile. Well, he gets around me and immediately has to slow down for town. So by the time the lane split, the douche-mobile was about 100 feet in front of me. I figure he was 100 feet behind me when it freaked out, so the douche-mobile gained himself 200 feet by pulling a ****ing stunt and making the oncoming car slow down.

Really? 200 mother****ing feet? 200? Jesus ****ing Christ.

I'm sure the douche-mobile was cussing me because I didn't feel like waxing a cop.

The hell of it is that it was a car from the next town over. Had to know where the cop was in relation to town, and he had to know what I was doing. You'd think most people in the area would exercise some common sense. The level of stupid in this world is mind boggling sometimes.

The general public. I've never seen so many useless, god damned heathens in my life. When you shop for Tide, do you REALLY have to pick up the ****ing box/bottle to make the call? Are you going to take a ****ing test-sip of the shit or something? When choosing a box of Kleenex, is it REALLY necessary to dig through every box until you find a color pattern that suits your dumb ass? IT'S TISSUE, MOTHER****ER! You're not choosing a new goddamned doctor or HMO!
Sonofabitch...I have a small part time retail gig for extra money, I can not BELIEVE how many stupid mother****ers are roaming this earth. You know what I do when I shop? I make a list, and I go buy the shit I need. And I don't stand in the aisle with my thumb up my ass making international peace talks over Charmin vs Quilted Northern. Oh, and I don't CALL the ****ing store to do my shopping either. I get my ass in the ****ing car and GO THERE. I'm selling $1600.00 worth of furniture to customer who had the decency to come down and work face to face with me, and YOU want to pull me away from them so you can find out over the phone if the latest foam ass-pads have come in yet? Get the **** off my phone. Ugh.
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****

JFC. I'm bad at a lot of shit but come the **** on.

My god. This is how you get people to hate you. Like really hate you. Not just angry. Hate.

You have to be the most worthless **** that has ever crawled this earth. **** you.

Sorry. Had to get that out somewhere without making anything worse.