ChiefsPlanet - Life Women: Lean In and Poop at the Office, Already

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Women: Lean In and Poop at the Office, Already (https://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?t=272670)

Beef Supreme

05-01-2013 10:01 AM

When I was about 13 years old I went on a hiking trip to Philmont Scout Ranch. After 10 days of hiking in the mountains we returned to the base camp. I walked into a stall to do my business and there was a turd sitting in the bowl that was as big as my forearm from elbow to wrist. I was an athletic 155 lbs at the time, not some scrawny kid. This thing would not flush, and I was actually compelled to go bring others in to take a look at it.

Not exactly on topic, but I just had to share.

Iowanian

05-01-2013 10:05 AM

I once wrote an ode to lady dumps

Quote:

Originally Posted by Iowanian (Post 3136085)

She placed some calls to Guiness
To see what the feat was worth..
While she hadn't measured the cable yet
She assumed it had a record Girth.

A lady doesn't crap and tell
but sometimes she just must
She birthed a brown so big around,
she thought her pelvis would bust.

She has an horseman there to verify,
the cable when it lands
He tipped his hat and said
"by gawd, I think your brown is 19 hands".

Ripley sent the cameras
Guiness sent the measure tape,
Her landlord brought a shovel
For the skidmarks left to scrape.

She feels her face a flushing
as every one who takes a peek...
laughs at her new fortune
that with Ripleys now she seeks

So get a ticket to stand in line
To get yourself a look...
Or look for the record cable
In this years' Guiness book.

ChiefaRoo

05-01-2013 10:08 AM

Dayze

05-01-2013 10:10 AM

There Once was a Woman from Nantucket,
and she shit like a horse.

I'm not very good at poems or limericks.

Mr. Flopnuts

05-01-2013 10:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by theelusivedeucedrop (Post 9648379)

Humbled and honored. Do I send a thank you note or what?

Just break the cycle and drop that deuce. At work.

Iowanian

05-01-2013 10:12 AM

Let me try to help

There once was a woman from nantucket
and she shit like a horse
with no effort she filled up a bucket
stunk out the office without remorse

ChiefGator

05-01-2013 10:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Iowanian (Post 9648463)

Let me try to help

There once was a woman from nantucket
and she shit like a horse
with no effort she filled up a bucket
stunk out the office without remorse

You are a modern day Longsworth...

bevischief

05-01-2013 10:25 AM

1 Attachment(s)

bevischief

05-01-2013 10:28 AM

1 Attachment(s)

tooge

05-01-2013 10:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chiefs Pantalones (Post 9648429)

Most disgusting post of the year goes to luv.

Yeah, thanks a lot Luv. Here I am, 46 years old, married, and a father of two, and I now find out that women poop? It's like finding out about Santa all over again.

luv	05-01-2013 10:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chiefs Pantalones (Post 9648429)

Most disgusting post of the year goes to luv.

Oh please. I've seen you guys talk about the same stuff.

luv	05-01-2013 10:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tooge (Post 9648613)

Yeah, thanks a lot Luv. Here I am, 46 years old, married, and a father of two, and I now find out that women poop? It's like finding out about Santa all over again.

LMAO

frankotank

05-01-2013 01:46 PM

"Still, women are widely believed to experience greater pooping anxiety than men." ROFLROFLROFL

DUH! men don't give a shit! (pun intended)
if ya gotta poop...ya gotta poop.
my office has the mens and womens restrooms directly next to cubicles! I mean, like, there's a cubicle with an employee working in it about 8 feet from the door of each restroom. now me personally....if I'm in a stall and someones leaving, I'll wait until the door closes to engage in audible dookage. but some dudes...I swear they must wait for that door to open and PLLLLLLLLLL (is that how you spell a fart/poop noise?) I mean sometimes it's so damn bad. and you KNOW those people sitting right outside the door gotta be like.....DAAAAAYYYUMMM! ROFL

WV	05-01-2013 01:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phobia (Post 9648240)

I'll poop in front of anybody. Don't care. It's the wiping that gets to me. I can't do that in front of anybody.

Precisely!

listopencil

05-01-2013 01:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by theelusivedeucedrop (Post 9648396)

New mission: poop weighing

I got 1.3 pounds this morning. I just bought a new digital scale.

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