I think they already have one of these. It's called the sybian.

"The finest trick of the devil is to persuade you that he does not exist."

Is that the saddle looking thing with the remote controlled dildo?...

I didn't mention which kind of dysfunction.

So I don't understand why someone wouldn't just sit in their house and keep the button depressed for eternity.

Women get bored more quickly than cats...

We have more shit to do than cats.
I always fall asleep right after.
Like, RIGHT after.
No cuddling.
Go watch TV.

Yeah.

Other than the fact we'd never get along long term and we agree on almost nothing you're PERFECT!

Yes. I wonder if those things are as good as they seem (based on internet pron which, of course, I have never actually watched).

They were like $5,000 in the early 90's.

Er....so I hear.

I'd like to think they're much more affordable now.

It'd make my sundays a breeze...

It would be one helluva 12 to 14 minutes.

If I take a hydrocodone first I can push it to 50.

Well, I'm not sure if its just that, the beer, or a combination of both but **** it.
Spin the wheel - take a ride...:)

I wonder if you could rig it up to a Madden Game where it turns on every time you score. It would be a great way to get the wife interested in gaming.

I see absolutely no reason why you couldn't.

In fact, I'm almost positive you could with a simple webcam, the right Raspberry Pi Ultimate Starter Kit, and way more time than anyone outside of Clay has...