After 14 days in the hospital...
 

heart surgery, pace maker installed and various other abuses on my body, I'm going home today.

I still have a lot of recovery left and this week has been an emotional wreck, but I'm a high, high right now.

Thanks for the prayers and well wishes. They helped me through some dark times.

---Jeff

So was this one of those hospitals with hot and loose nurses that ran around in bikinis? Yeah, that could cause a heart attack. Congrats on going home.

If you get to keep the hospital gown, I'd say it was worth it.

Glad you came out ok!

There were some lookers for sure. No bigger thrill than getting a catheter removed by a super model. :D
Thanks but no thanks. I'm so looking forward to wearing a pair of jeans that encloses my ass rather than bear it to the whole world.

You'll feel better than your old self in 6 months time. Hope your recovery goes well.

Apparently you weren't overly conscious when they put it in. Foley for the aaaarrrrrggghhhh what did you just do to me?

You should of taken everything out of that room. You paid for it.

Keep the water mug and the vomit bowl. Glad you are back!

Best of luck with your recovery.

Are you allowed to use microwaves after this? I think if you stand too close to a microwave with a pacemaker, it can cause a cesium fire inside your body from the battery, and the only way to put it out is to cut you open on site. It happened to the brother in law of a friend of mine.

Give'em hell bud.

Good to hear and take care.

I haven't yet, but I sure know I will.

pace yourself...


too soon?

really glad you're doing well jeff dudey!

Rub some dirt in it you pussy...

We knew you would make it, The Lord takes care of his people! :D

Best Wishes!!

Good for you Jeff. Take it from one who's been there. If you feel weak and depressed it's all normal. It will go away.

Good luck.

did the surgeon ummm ... violate you ... you know ... anally while you were under anesthesia?




congrats

Ummm, since, I, uh wasn't awake I don't know. I've had no blood in the bum so I'm going with negative ghost rider.

Congrats man. Happy you're going home.

Congrats and keep it up!

:eek: :eek:

I had blood in mine? They told me it was from internal bleeding. :hmmm:

Did you discuss politics with the Surgeon beforehand?...

Good news buddy
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I don't know exactly where to fit it in but there has to be something that happened in mid air inserted here.


:)

I think I speak on behalf of...everyone. Stop the bloody stool talk!

Yeah.

$#it like this is why I'm ok with crawling out into the wild to die like any good Indian (sorry, Native American) with self-respect...

Get a std/aids test.

Glad you are going home, hopefully you will have a speedy recovery!

Glad to hear it Jeff. Good luck on your recovery.

Good to hear you're going home man.

:LOL:

Take away the "mid-air" crack, and I bet the rest of the sentence must have been what my doctor said while I was out.

NO, my doctor was a 'ferner' from Pakistan. :)

I thought that was tattoos that did this.

I'm glad you lived. Now I'm going to cancel that life insurance policy I took out on you and chalk it up as a poor investment.

Excellent news.

See, you got all worked up over nothing. :)

Enjoy being home, and have fun getting back into decathalon shape.

glad you are doing well now.

Grab some McDonalds on the way home.

Good to hear you're goin home man! Take care!

Exactly. I have something better. So yesterday, I finally will myself to take a shit. It was a less than spectacular, but nonetheless healthy shit. At the end of said such bowel movement, I let go with a little trickle of piss that felt different. I look down and it wasn't piss but pure blood. I freaked (as I'm sure a lot of people would do), hit the nurse light, and stood there, in the john with pp in had, until she arrived and demanded an explanation.

Turns out nothing more than a blood clot from the trauma of the catheter insertion, but scared the shit out of me nonetheless.

Could you imagine if men menstruated? The world would cease to function.

Glad to hear, JD. Keep us posted on the recovery.

Glad to hear it man. Here's to a fast effective recovery.

I remember the 2nd week after my heart surgery. I was as weak as a kitten. I had no stamina and getting up stairs would drain me. You will get strong again and after a year you will feel much better. Make sure you walk every day or your muscles will atrophy and it will become painful to do so. Food tasted like chewing on asperins for about 6 months but that passes.

Congrats to your sucessful surgery may you live a long and happy life.

Good news man. To be on the safe side avoid watching the draft.

bet you're glad that's over.

Glad to hear you pulled through some pretty serious procedures, best wishes and take it easy for a while.